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I guess I am a sucker for books on habits, because all of a sudden I realized I've read a lot of them. This one is unique - I wouldn't say its the best for actually forming habits, but there are plenty of valuable insights here that make it well worth the read. And its might be the first one that I recommend to anyone else who asks, because it is very accessible and relatable. The author strikes a perfect balance of information and anecdote, and you will learn a lot without even realizing it.
Things I Loved About This Book: * The 4 Tendencies: For most of this book, I thought these were not too impressive - I felt like all of them fit me somewhat. However, by the end of the book, I realized just how helpful they were. The quiz at the end to determine which tendency you fall in is very helpful, and you might want to skip ahead after the first chapter if you aren't sure what category you fall in. (I'm a questioner). * Habits are different for different people. Rubin is the first author I've read who captures this concept well, and it makes complete sense once its presented. I have a 'lightning bolt' habit approach where habits are often formed overnight, but its helpful to see that many people aren't wired that way. * Loved the section on abstinence being easier than moderation (for some people some of the time). Great insight, and a unique observation. * The loophole spotting chapter is very helpful as well. Helps correct some of the self-defeating loopholes we often build into our habits. * The danger of rewards and the benefits of treats was very good as well. External rewards that combat the habits we want to set are bad, internal treats that reinforce our habits are good. Simple . . . but hard to implement.Read more ›
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152 of 160 people found the following review helpful
I wasn't familiar with Gretchen Rubin before ordering an advanced copy of this book as part of the Vine program, but I love self-help books and thought that this book would help me with some New Year's resolutions that, two weeks into 2015, I still haven't been able to make happen. Eat better? Exercise more? Stop procrastinating on certain work projects? Cut back on my internet addiction? Yes, I have a long list of things I need to work on, and this book is a great first step in making those things happen.
The premise of this book is we can establish and then use habits to affect change in our lives. "Habits," Rubin states in the book's introduction, "make change possible by freeing us from decision-making and from using self-control." What Rubin means by this is that we can learn how to modify our behaviors so that we automatically do those things that we might otherwise not want to (like exercise, clean up after ourselves, avoid junk food, etc.). In the same way that we automatically brush our teeth without thinking about it, we can learn how to make other desirable behaviors (like eating better, avoiding time wasters, etc.) into "no brainers" that become folded into our everyday lives.
As Rubin further explains in the opening section, we have to choose strategies that will work for our specific personality type. To accomplish that, the book opens with a section that has you figure out what your main "tendency" is: are you an Upholder, Questioner, Rebel, Obliger, or perhaps a combo of these four types? From there, Rubin puts the principles in action by providing twenty-one strategies for helping you establish the habits that you want to create in your own life.Read more ›
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117 of 126 people found the following review helpful
I have mixed feelings about this book. On the upside, there are a lot of interesting insights and helpful 'customizable' frameworks that can help you build healthy habits... Such as the Upholder/Obliger/Rebel/Questioner and Abstainer/Moderator concepts. However, all this could be summed up in a dozen pages or so and the takeaway messages would be much more clear and crisp.
Unfortunately, personal examples and anecdotes are (over)used for every point. I know way more about Gretchen's life, thoughts, and feelings than I want to... In fact, sometimes it felt like I was reading her personal diary (at one point she reminded herself of her Number One Commandment: "Be Gretchen"... Come on!) which was uncomfortable and a huge waste of time... so I ultimately had to scroll through pages at a time to just get back to the core messages that could help the READER work on their habits -- and not waste time on hearing how Gretchen and her friends and family were so successful in forming/maintaining their own habits.
Not sure if I'd recommend buying the book and wasting your time reading all of it or if I'd just recommend reading reviews and articles that cut through the cr*p and just explain her basic but very helpful habit forming frameworks, which are truly insightful and applicable to everyday life.
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68 of 73 people found the following review helpful
I am a big believer in using the power of habit to effect change in my life. In Better Than Before, Gretchen Rubin takes approach she applied to happiness and discovers the secrets of creating good habits and breaking bad habits to make our lives better.
When a subject catches her attention, Gretchen Rubin first studies it, then looks for ways to apply what she has learned to her life (and, sometimes to their pleasure, sometimes not, the people around her). She knows the research and shares findings with us, but she also shares lots of anecdotal evidence of these ideas in practice.
Rubin points out that people form habits differently, and identifies four personality types: (The Four Tendencies): Obligers, Upholders, Questioners and Rebels. As she discusses various habit formation techniques, she addresses which ones may work best for each of the four tendencies. Although you may not fit neatly into one category or another (I am mostly a Questioner, but have some Upholder characteristics) you will probably identify most strongly with one of the four.
As a writer, I liked that several examples of habit formation had to do with writing habits. However, you do not have to be a writer to benefit from the ideas here. There are tips and techniques that will help you form habits related to whatever aspect of your life you want to change: eating better, exercising, getting more sleep, being more productive, even enjoying more leisure time and more.
I like Rubin's personal approach to her subject. If you liked The Happiness Project, you will probably also enjoy Better Than Before. If you didn't like it, you probably won't like this book, either. If you haven't read anything by Gretchen Rubin before, give this one a try. She might even become a habit!
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This item: Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives
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