Better Than Chocolate [Paperback]

Bruce Golden (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 2007 | ISBN-10: 1934135461 | ISBN-13: 978-1934135464

Noah Dane is a mid-21st Century San Francisco police inspector who, while hunting his partner's killer and investigating a pair of seemingly unrelated murders, stumbles onto a conspiracy that threatens all humanity. Noah is driven by the guilt over his partner's death. That guilt begins to eat at him, eventually rendering him impotent.
Much to his dismay, someone in the city's bureaucracy has a warped sense of humor. Noah's new crime-fighting partner is a celebudroid created to look and act like Marilyn Monroe. Comic juxtaposition ensues when her original programming seeps into her police work.
Chastity Blume is a celebrity talk show host known as America's Favorite Virgin. Her quest to find the mother she's never known uncovers family secrets she would rather not have learned, along with a sinister plot that involves her father.
Together they lead a cast of quirky characters through this science fiction mystery towards a climax of comically sexy proportions that's Better Than Chocolate.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"If Mickey Spillane had collaborated with both Frederik Pohl and Philip K. Dick, he might have produced Bruce Golden's Better Than Chocolate."
Asimov's Science Fiction"

"Bruce Golden's gonzo police procedural of the future mixes aliens, sex, and murder into a hard-punching satirical adventure that inserts its stilettos of critical wit so stealthily that you'll die laughing."
Paul Di Filippo, Hugo & Nebula Award finalist

"Its vibrant characters are both larger-than-life and true to it . . . a delicate balance of parody and punchy realism."
SFRevu

Jam-packed with double entendres, tweaked expressions, and futuristic jargon, this book is damned fun...a fast-moving, entertaining read you won't be able to put down...pure sci-fi satisfaction, living up to its title in delicious spades."
Razar Magazine

About the Author

Novelist, journalist, satirist, Bruce Golden's short stories have been published more than 90 times across eight countries.  Asimov's Science Fiction described his second book, "If Mickey Spillane had collaborated with both Frederik Pohl and Philip K. Dick, he might have produced Bruce Golden's Better Than Chocolate."  The same reviewer said of his novel Evergreen, "If you can imagine Ursula Le Guin channeling H. Rider Haggard, you'll have the barest conception of this stirring book, which centers around a mysterious artifact and the people in its thrall. Reminiscent of the work of Robert Silverberg, this planetary romance will introduce lucky readers to a world both magical and spooky, yet ultimately as tangible as your own backyard."

Product Details

• Paperback: 292 pages
• Publisher: Zumaya Otherworlds (April 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1934135461
• ISBN-13: 978-1934135464
• Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 5.9 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,689,612 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

After more than 20 years as a journalist, publishing more than 200 articles, working as a magazine editor, radio reporter, and television producer, Bruce Golden decided to walk away from journalism and concentrate all his efforts on his first love-writing speculative fiction. That's what he wanted to do when, at age 18, he decided to be a writer. But life, as it often tends to do, took him in a different direction. The jobs in journalism kept coming, and there were bills to pay. Along the way, some of the work, like writing and producing his all-original show Radio Free Comedy and producing documentaries like "Sex in the '90s," he found rewarding. He dabbled in writing science fiction and fantasy-and never stopped reading it-but the time to pursue it seemed elusive.
That all changed at the turn of the century, when decided to devote himself entirely to writing fiction. Since then his short stories have garnered several awards and more than 90 sales across eight countries. Asimov's Science Fiction described his second novel, "If Mickey Spillane had collaborated with both Frederik Pohl and Philip K. Dick, he might have produced Bruce Golden's Better Than Chocolate." His latest novel, Evergreen, takes readers to alien world full of ancient secrets and a strange intelligence, populated with characters motivated by revenge, redemption, and obsession, on a quest to find the City of God.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars GREAT SUMMER READ!, August 3, 2007

By 

Patrick W. Gallagher "Pat" (Missouri, USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Better Than Chocolate (Paperback)

If you could cross Mickey Spillane and Robert Heinlein you'd probably get a book with something close to the quick witted, hard-hitting characters moving across its bizzaro future-scape.

The lead character, Noah Dane, fits the mold of the typical detective novel hero with enough of a Heinlein-esque quirkiness to make the whacky vision of the future seem not only plausible, but too comical not to be real. Dane moves through a technologically transformed San Francisco of a not too distant future that comes to life through what seemed like thousands of novel devices and fresh witticisms. It takes a few short, jam-packed chapters to set the stage, but once I was into the meat of the story it was hard not to want to know what mutant-street urchin or sexually charged android would appear next, and what they would do--to who.

From the whimsically well-fleshed dystopia to its endearingly comical showdown, this book is just what the title says it is. Every page demanded louder to be turned until the last one put me to bed with a smile on my face.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Adventure into the future, August 2, 2007

By 

Robert E. Keesey "WC Keesey" (Harrisburg, PA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Better Than Chocolate (Paperback)

This book is truly a sexy satire using futuristic police procedures and robots to tell the story of Noah Dane. When Noah's partner is killed and the killer is the only one from the Blue Scoprs to escape his 50 caliber Desert Eagle XIX, Noah is hot on his trail. With his new partner, a robot that is a clone of Marilyn Monroe, he searches the mean streets of the San Francisco.

Bruce Golden's skill as a satirist, his imaginative depiction of the future in our law enforcement departments, and his vivid characters, intertwined with the everyday personal problems that the reader can relate to, makes for an entertaining tale.

Review by Wanda C. Keesey