Customer Reviews

The Big Bang: A Guide to the New Sexual Universe

5 star:		(30)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

For about six years, Nerve.com has been the intelligent person's sexual website, one of the few diamonds among the dross of commercial sexuality available on the internet. It has pictures of naked people, to be sure, but often pictured from a comic or artistic view; this is not the place to find traditional cheesecake pin-ups. At Nerve, the old excuse "I only get it for the articles" is actually credible. There are serious essays about sexual topics, historic investigations, memoirs, and hilarious investigative articles by a novice trying sexual techniques. There is a personals site with ads that are fun to look at even if you aren't in the market. For the past three years, Nerve has been where to read "The Em & Lo Down," sexual and relationship advice from Emma Taylor and Lorelei Sharkey, or, as the subscript goes, "Advice From Near Experts." Funny or serious, their counsel is always worth reading, even if they are only near experts. Now Em and Lo have produced _The Big Bang: Nerve's Guide to the New Sexual Universe_ (Plume), although the production is credited to "the writers at Nerve" and seems to have been a team effort. True to Nerve tradition, the new sex manual is practical, good looking, and fun to read.

Em and Lo cannot do anything without humor, and there is plenty here. The most serious it gets is Chapter 12, which is simply titled "Read This Chapter." It starts, "Don't even think about skipping this chapter, because whatever you know, it's not enough." It is, inevitably, about sexually transmitted diseases. There is more to sex than seriousness, Em and Lo would be the first to agree, and most of the rest of the volume is devoted to having fun. There is a great chapter on what used to be called Hong Kong honeymoon accessories, marital aids, or adult novelties, but are now simply, and with brisk appropriateness, called toys. There are pages and pages of descriptions of toys, pros, cons, and suggestions; you will even find the "Hello Kitty Vibe" featuring the mouthless visage of the kitschy cat. (_The Big Bang_ may be written by women, by the way, but the advice, just like most of the toys, can be used on both sexes.) There are simply lots of good suggestions in other chapters, given by enthusiastic authors who have obviously found their dream subject. There are many, many suggestions for couples. A great chapter on kink allows that "Just because you like to be tied up, spanked, and called 'bitch' doesn't mean you're a bad feminist." There are useful chapters on oral and anal sex, the G spot, birth control, and lubricants. A whole chapter is devoted to the importance for both sexes of doing Kegel exercises for better performance and pleasure. Yes, yes, yes.

_The Big Bang_ lacks the mass and comprehensiveness of the excellent _The Guide to Getting It On!_, but it has great humor, sound advice, and an enthusiasm for the subject that ought to be infectious. It can be enjoyed solo, but would be fine material for couples to read together. For those who value jocular, informal, and informative writing, and don't know everything about sex, this will be a delight.

em and lo have a weekly sex and relationship column at nerve.com. the big bang is an outgrowth of that work.
i have found this to be an excellent reference on human sexuality.

rufus griscom, ceo of nerve, provides a thoughtful two page introduction. the summary paragraph is quoted,

"this is all good. as individuals getting to know one another, and as a species, we need more humility.
if you embrace the absurdity of it and really, truly enjoy it, you will be the best possible lover.
if you then also employ the tips in this book-forget about it. your lover will follow you around like
a lapdog for the rest of his or her life. use your power for good."

the book has three parts.

the first section "sex for beginners,just the basics"

covers

ah...ah...ahchoooo!!! (the anti-climactic orgasm chapter)
me time (nerve's masturbation manifesto)
the niceties (foreplay is everything)
can i get a hand here? (manually stimulating your partner)
heading south (the art of oral sex)
just doing it (the ins and outs of intercourse)
doing the butt (a complete guide to anal fun)

the second section "sex for advanced swimmers, getting tricky with it"

covers

g lust and special sauce (the mysterious world of the g-spot and female ejaculation)
going deep (fisting for pacifists)
sex toys won't break your heart (plugging in your sex life)
kink, it's not what you think... (bdsm for the rest of us)

the third section "sex for winners!, safer sex and sexual fitness"

covers

read this chapter (std's you could have right now!)
putting up walls (condoms, condoms, condoms)
the choice is yours (birth control and emergency contraception)
ladie's night (beyond sugar and spice: vaginas and boobies)
self help for your peter (everything you wanted to know about penises and weren't afraid to ask)
pumping your love muscles (kegels for him and her)
wet your whistle (the importance of lube)

finally

the hipbone's connected to the...(the below the belt anatomy appendix)

a bibliography and acknowledgments and a bit about the authors.

this book is destined to be a classic reference for the next decade...

After giving it a thorough read, I purchased this book for my 16-year-old son, presenting it to him with the caveat, "This is a learner's permit, not a driver's license."

We live in a state where you say "bush" and people think "W." Sex education (not) is strictly limited to antediluvian abstinence-only sermons, and whether parents want to face the fact or not, that's totally inadequate. To realistically promote teen abstinence, we need to 1) promote masturbation as the physically and emotionally healthier alternative to intercourse and 2) de-mystify sex with accurate information on the mechanical and social realities about which healthy teens are naturally curious. The information in The Big Bang is balanced, accessible, clinically sound, and painfully (fisting?!) thorough. And it's presented with the same sort of hip, hilarious writing you find in The Onion (my son's favorite news source.) Frankly, I learned a few things myself.

Thanks, Em & Lo, for providing a platform from which we'll be able to launch some awkward but meaningful dialogue. My daughter will be getting a copy for her 16th birthday next year.

The Big Bang is frank, hysterical, and full of naughty pictures. It manages something I thought was impossible in a sex manual - it answers your questions without making you feel like a freak or a prude. It's an amusing and engaging read even if you're not gettin' any, and if you are, it's indispensable. This book couldn't get any cooler, not even if it came with a ray gun.

I thought this book was great. I read Em and Lo's column, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to buy the book, but I'm glad I did. It's written in the same catchy language, it's smart, I feel like it speaks to me. It's not like other sex manuals I've read that feel cold or too medical or make you feel embarrassed to be reading them. And becasue Em and Lo wrote it, I trust the info and their opinions. I love that it covers taboo subjects like anal sex and bondage with the same tone and attention that it gives to more common stuff, like STD's. And the pictures are hot!

I thought I was pretty well versed in the ways of amore, but I found quite a few new ideas in The Big Bang, including a clear explanation of the G-spot (finally!) and a new (and non-scary) approach to bondage and domination. And it's all presented in a way one would talk with one's friends: funny and lighthearted, but very helpful and insightful. I'm definitely getting a copy for my friend's bachelorette party so she can take it on her honeymoon!

I purchased this book at a wholesale discount outlet, shortly after reading Lou Paget's THE BIG O, (which I never reviewed mainly because I couldn't detract from the friend who gave it to me whose glowing review of Paget's book I could never match)and in the mood for similiar guides etc.

Immediately I was pleasantly surprised, and impressed with the book.

For one thing the first thing I noticed was the layout is the flashiness of a magazine in a book without being distracting. Each chapter has a catchy title totally relevant to the topic covered. Additionally full colour illustrations of attractive couples demonstrating techniques etc add a nice visual without being graphic or obscene.

As to the content itself, the editors state in their positioning chapter that the Kamu Sutra covers almost every position under the sun etc and THE BIG BANG isn't going to rehash previously covered techniques. In other words it is not a book about trying to be an updated version of the classic text, but rather a guide in its own right with its own voice. It is a sexual primer advertised for the millenium (or least late nineties excuse my inaccuracy as my memory isn't perfect lol) and pretty much lives up to its own hype.

There is definitely a Generation X and later tone to the writing. Topics covered may in some cases make our parents blush as THE BIG BANG unflinchingly covers the gauntlet of sexual practices including foreplay, oral sex, intercourse, anal sex, sex toys... etc you get the picture.

One of the most important and impressive parts comes near the end however as it dedicates much space to STDs responsiblity, and contraception.

What seperates THE BIG BANG from other books on the subject is probably the overall flavor of the text liberally sprinkled with wit, humour and insight aimed at a younger audience as I say I would have to say it does a excellent job as a book for its target market while still appealing to old fogies looking for the occassional tip/pointer like myself.

As a concerned scientist and married man, I find this primer to be both very informative and very entertaining. This book definitely is not for the prude or for the über-conservative, neither is for guys looking for pornographic material in books. It is, as someone mentioned, very clinical and factual yet posed in a frank and even raw manner. The pictorials are shocking and graphic, but they're so with a pourpose and for a reason. And that reason is that sex can and is one of innermost desires that conservative-minded people have tried to obfuscate for ages. We all live and breath sex. Humans are sexual beings, and any notion to the contrary is just ignorance. I don't have a teen-aged son or daughter, but if I did, I'd certainly entertain the idea of giving him or her a copy (depending on their maturity). I myself have learned many "tricks" that might have seemed obvious to me and never tried thinking that I was just being nonsensical and puerile, but have turned out to be of great satisfaction.
Further, the unassuming and candid tone of the author(s) is very artsy and literate. The only one reason I gave 4 stars is the fact that I think they went a little too far with the plethora of euphemisms for masturbation. But, with no qualms, I recommend this book to all of you (teens, adults, old-timers, etc.)

If you don't think you need this book than you need it more than you could ever realize. It's filled with great pictures, and is a lot of fun to read with your partner (it might help you talk them into something you've been wanting to try).
I'd never own Joy of Sex -- my parents probably looked at that book -- but BIG BANG will be on my coffee table for a long time. It's great. Check it out.

The Big Bang is one of the most informative and useful books that I have ever read! This book is extremely intelligent and hilarious, all while providing great basics and advanced tips. The Big Bang is by far superior to other sex/relationship books that I have read. I had a hard time getting through this one--only because my friends would swipe it from me whenever I set it down! My roommates and I read chapters aloud and then have discussions about the topics, our thoughts and our past experiences. The Big Bang should be required reading!