Big Sister Now: A Story About Me and Our New Baby (Hardcover)

by Annette Sheldon (Author), Karen Maizel (Illustrator)

Editorial Reviews

From School Library Journal
PreS—This picture book portrays a child's feelings when she is no longer the baby in the family. It's hard when she's told repeatedly to wait, for breakfast or for book time. And even though she tries to be helpful, she doesn't always succeed. Even so, her parents regularly praise her for her behavior, which allows her to say, "I don't like to wait. But I do like to feel big." In the end, she's off with Grandma to bake cookies, a job only she, as big sister, is able to do. The book remains positive even as it shows some of the struggles of this newly expanded family. The text is supported by softly colored, expressive illustrations that capture this challenging time of life; objects scattered about create a realistically messy setting. Back matter has useful advice for parents about the possible emotional responses exhibited by an older child toward a new sibling. The story is simple and relaxed, and the insight of the final pages will be welcomed.—Martha Topol, Traverse Area District Library, Traverse City, MI
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist
PreS. Among the flood of titles about older siblings and new babies, this book, published under the auspices of the American Psychological Association, stands out for its appealing illustrations and direct story, which wraps a clear, comforting message. With minimal words, Sheldon zeroes in on an older child's feelings of displacement: "Always before, when Mommy and Daddy said, 'the baby,' they meant me . . . Now . . . they mean Daniel." Maizel's pencil-and-watercolor pictures show Kate, a preschooler whose confusion and resentment gradually transform. She learns to be patient during Daniel's crying jags and feedings, and she begins to relish the things older kids can do, such as baking with Grandma. Children will recognize the warmth and clutter in the cozy domestic scenes, and feel comforted as Kate's parents reassure, love, and gently guide her toward acceptance. An appended section offers parents solid ideas for helping a child adjust to a new baby. Though cataloged as nonfiction, the book will fit perfectly among fiction titles on the subject. Gillian Engberg
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

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Product Details

• Reading level: Ages 4-8
  
• Hardcover: 32 pages
• Publisher: Magination Press; 1 edition (August 15, 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1591472431
• ISBN-13: 978-1591472438
• Product Dimensions: 10.1 x 8.1 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars See all reviews (7 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #330,308 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

61 of 67 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Please choose another! This one made me cringe!, June 29, 2006

By	Birdy Boy - See all my reviews

I think the first reviewer doesn't have kids. She gave no indication. The second reviewer was dead on but she didn't give details. When pregnant with my third child, I wanted to find a good big sister book for my daughter (my second child). We loaded up on big brother books before she was born and they were a big help to my son. I NEVER read this book to my daughter because I didn't want the negative thoughts that it depicts to enter her mind. In the first pages of the book, the little girl is shown in very clearly resentful and ugly moods, looking over at the new baby with Mommy and Daddy with pure venom. Mid-book, there are several spreads dedicated to how incredibly busy everyone always is with the new baby and how big sister is made to wait frequently and for long, long, (seriously) long periods of time while baby is dealt with. She is, of course, told that it is difficult sometimes to wait but that it is part of being a big girl and that the baby can't wait for things. Then, the worst part...

"One afternoon I needed Mommy to read a book, but Daniel was crying. So Mommy had to rock him. She rocked and rocked. Daniel cried and cried." Big sister is shown on the next page waiting with the book, in three different poses, implying that she's waiting quite a while. "I had to wait. I waited and waited." On the following spread, "While Mommy rocked, I brought Daniel's new blanket" (presumably to help comfort the crying baby). The poor dear is shown coming in with the blanket and slipping on the book she wanted Mommy to read to her. She falls on the floor next to Mommy and baby in the rocking chair. Still, does Mommy get up and console her? Does Mommy invite her to join them in the rocking chair? Nope. Mommy looks sort of proud on the next page as she watches her daughter try to pull herself together while sitting on the floor nearby, "reading" the book (upside down) and sobbing by herself, drying her eyes on the blanket. Well, I'm sorry, but my two older children did not cease to be my babies too when my new babies came home and that's definitely not an image I wanted my daughter to remember when her baby brother came home.

I'm not naive. I've got three kids now. I know about resentful feelings. They will happen even when parents have the best of intentions. However, this book doesn't introduce our daughters to the idea of being big sisters with the best of intentions. Try Joanna Cole's "I'm a Big Sister" for that. I'm irked by the bottle-feeding in that book and the pictures seem outdated but the message is fantastic. It addresses waiting and crying in a MUCH more positive way. I also really liked "Hello Baby" by Lizzy Rockwell. It discusses pregnancy, in utero growth, and the baby's homecoming. It may seem too long and advanced for young children but that didn't bother me. I used it for both of my first two children and just let them look at the pictures while I modified the story to suit their respective ages. Also, if your kids are older and dealing with issues of sibling rivalry and who Mommy or Daddy loves best, I highly recommend "I Love You the Purplest" by Barbara Joosse. It gives perhaps the best lesson of all time to help parents combat resentment between children.

I will say that I can see a use for this book if I had a daughter who (despite my best intentions in preparing her for big-sisterhood) was having very seriously negative feelings about being a big sister. This book could help her understand that those feeling can be normal and that things will improve with time. I wouldn't buy it until then though. I also have a Master's Degree in Social Work and I know about giving a voice to feelings. I would never discourage my children from voicing their resentment, irritation, anger, etc. about the new baby. However, I also know that children model behavior, even that which is found in the books we read to them. If you introduce them to the idea that they're going to be left out and made to wait when their new sibling comes along, they will be expecting trouble and the resentment depicted in the book will almost surely become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I absolutely believe in allowing, even ENCOURAGING, children to voice negative feelings; I just feel it's counter-productive and unnecessary to introduce them before they crop up on their own. So, to the reviewer who plans to give this book as a gift to all the expectant parents she knows, I implore you to stick to the parents' registry. It is much more respectful of their wishes to do so. Just because you think this book would be valuable for them does not mean they will agree. This book was a gift to me from someone who thought we would enjoy it and it was just a waste of money. I could really use more crib sheets though! Registry...

Also, speaking of modeling behavior... Any parent sensitive enough to be cruising Amazon looking for a good book to help a daughter prepare for her new sibling would not exhibit the kind of cruel neglect of the daughter's feelings that you see in this book. I have much more of a problem with the behavior of the parents in this book than I do with the big sister's behavior. Who can blame the poor girl for the resentment she's experiencing?

Yes, a child having a new sibling has been compared to a husband or wife bringing a new spouse home. However, it's not exactly that extreme or fewer people would do it, some several times over. Also, I don't see myself EVER frolicking with my husband's new wife in the sandbox or us happily tooling around after each other on tricycles a mere two years after our introduction. Kids adjust because we prepare them and nurture them and express to them in a myriad of ways that siblings are a gift to one another. Even if the comparison was accurate, the logical conclusion should not be to tell a child, "Oh, yeah, it's going to be wretched and you'll be second fiddle for a while but don't worry because it will get better." The solution is to prepare them with some information about the needs of new babies and then to do your absolute best to give them an abundance of love and attention once the new baby comes. I'm on my third and I truly haven't found it that big of a challenge to make time and room on my lap for my older ones--many times even while nursing the newborn. Yes, the house is in shambles sometimes and I can get pretty exhausted but the priority here is taking good care of all three of my babies.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent preparation for big sister, August 16, 2006

By	Susan T. Gardner (Natick, MA United States) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I thought this book was great. I understand what previous reviewers are saying about the sister seeming to be ignored, but I think what we have to keep in mind is that she is probably not waiting as long as we think she is - the book is written from her perspective, not the parents'. If mom has to nurse for 1 more minute, it might seem like 30 to a two year old. And personally, I am not able to pour cereal while nursing so if my daughter wants some, she has to wait.

I felt like this really gave my daughter (age 3) some good preparation for what to expect when her baby brother arrived. I also think that it helped her understand that it was OK to express some resentment toward him at first. The illustrations were fantastic - I enjoyed seeing the disorganized house and harried parents.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Our Daugher & Big Sister Loves This Book, September 2, 2007

By	E. Giromini (Chicago, IL) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This review is from: Big Sister Now: A Story About Me and Our New Baby (Paperback)

Our daughter was 3 yrs & 1 week old when our son was born and we bought this book because it was about a big sister with a little brother. Our daughter loves this book and so do we. We do not think that it is negative - rather realistic in that there will be frustrations and adjustments that the older child will have to make when the baby arrives. She recites the parts about being patient and having special time with Mommy and Daddy. She has been reading the book for over 6 months now and continues to enjoy it. We really loves the illustrations - the "big sister" wears a dress-up skirt over her PJs and our daughter does this all of the time. We strongly recommend this book as our family has greatly enjoyed it.