Big Sister Now: A Story about Me and Our New Baby [Hardcover]

Annette Sheldon (Author), Karen Maizel (Illustrator)

Book Description

Age Level: 2 and up

Kate feels left out and forgotten when her new baby brother Daniel arrives. The typical confusion and mixed feelings in sharing parents with a new and "demanding" baby trouble Kate. With her wit and resourceful nature, Kate explores her new role and achieves the confidence to embrace her little brother. Includes Note to Parents. Full-color illustrations.

Editorial Reviews

From School Library Journal

PreS—This picture book portrays a child's feelings when she is no longer the baby in the family. It's hard when she's told repeatedly to wait, for breakfast or for book time. And even though she tries to be helpful, she doesn't always succeed. Even so, her parents regularly praise her for her behavior, which allows her to say, "I don't like to wait. But I do like to feel big." In the end, she's off with Grandma to bake cookies, a job only she, as big sister, is able to do. The book remains positive even as it shows some of the struggles of this newly expanded family. The text is supported by softly colored, expressive illustrations that capture this challenging time of life; objects scattered about create a realistically messy setting. Back matter has useful advice for parents about the possible emotional responses exhibited by an older child toward a new sibling. The story is simple and relaxed, and the insight of the final pages will be welcomed.—Martha Topol, Traverse Area District Library, Traverse City, MI
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

PreS. Among the flood of titles about older siblings and new babies, this book, published under the auspices of the American Psychological Association, stands out for its appealing illustrations and direct story, which wraps a clear, comforting message. With minimal words, Sheldon zeroes in on an older child's feelings of displacement: "Always before, when Mommy and Daddy said, 'the baby,' they meant me . . . Now . . . they mean Daniel." Maizel's pencil-and-watercolor pictures show Kate, a preschooler whose confusion and resentment gradually transform. She learns to be patient during Daniel's crying jags and feedings, and she begins to relish the things older kids can do, such as baking with Grandma. Children will recognize the warmth and clutter in the cozy domestic scenes, and feel comforted as Kate's parents reassure, love, and gently guide her toward acceptance. An appended section offers parents solid ideas for helping a child adjust to a new baby. Though cataloged as nonfiction, the book will fit perfectly among fiction titles on the subject. Gillian Engberg
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

Product Details

• Reading level: Ages 2 and up
  
• Hardcover: 32 pages
• Publisher: Magination Press; 1 edition (August 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1591472431
• ISBN-13: 978-1591472438
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 10.3 x 0.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #134,139 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

114 of 121 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Please choose another! This one made me cringe!, June 29, 2006

By 

Birdy Boy - See all my reviews

This review is from: Big Sister Now: A Story about Me and Our New Baby (Hardcover)

I think the first reviewer doesn't have kids. She gave no indication. The second reviewer was dead on but she didn't give details. When pregnant with my third child, I wanted to find a good big sister book for my daughter (my second child). We loaded up on big brother books before she was born and they were a big help to my son. I NEVER read this book to my daughter because I didn't want the negative thoughts that it depicts to enter her mind. In the first pages of the book, the little girl is shown in very clearly resentful and ugly moods, looking over at the new baby with Mommy and Daddy with pure venom. Mid-book, there are several spreads dedicated to how incredibly busy everyone always is with the new baby and how big sister is made to wait frequently and for long, long, (seriously) long periods of time while baby is dealt with. She is, of course, told that it is difficult sometimes to wait but that it is part of being a big girl and that the baby can't wait for things. Then, the worst part...

"One afternoon I needed Mommy to read a book, but Daniel was crying. So Mommy had to rock him. She rocked and rocked. Daniel cried and cried." Big sister is shown on the next page waiting with the book, in three different poses, implying that she's waiting quite a while. "I had to wait. I waited and waited." On the following spread, "While Mommy rocked, I brought Daniel's new blanket" (presumably to help comfort the crying baby). The poor dear is shown coming in with the blanket and slipping on the book she wanted Mommy to read to her. She falls on the floor next to Mommy and baby in the rocking chair. Still, does Mommy get up and console her? Does Mommy invite her to join them in the rocking chair? Nope. Mommy looks sort of proud on the next page as she watches her daughter try to pull herself together while sitting on the floor nearby, "reading" the book (upside down) and sobbing by herself, drying her eyes on the blanket. Well, I'm sorry, but my two older children did not cease to be my babies too when my new babies came home and that's definitely not an image I wanted my daughter to remember when her baby brother came home.

I'm not naive. I've got three kids now. I know about resentful feelings. They will happen even when parents have the best of intentions. However, this book doesn't introduce our daughters to the idea of being big sisters with the best of intentions. Try Joanna Cole's "I'm a Big Sister" for that. I'm irked by the bottle-feeding in that book and the pictures seem outdated but the message is fantastic. It addresses waiting and crying in a MUCH more positive way. I also really liked "Hello Baby" by Lizzy Rockwell. It discusses pregnancy, in utero growth, and the baby's homecoming. It may seem too long and advanced for young children but that didn't bother me. I used it for both of my first two children and just let them look at the pictures while I modified the story to suit their respective ages. Also, if your kids are older and dealing with issues of sibling rivalry and who Mommy or Daddy loves best, I highly recommend "I Love You the Purplest" by Barbara Joosse. It gives perhaps the best lesson of all time to help parents combat resentment between children.

I will say that I can see a use for this book if I had a daughter who (despite my best intentions in preparing her for big-sisterhood) was having very seriously negative feelings about being a big sister. This book could help her understand that those feeling can be normal and that things will improve with time. I wouldn't buy it until then though. I also have a Master's Degree in Social Work and I know about giving a voice to feelings. I would never discourage my children from voicing their resentment, irritation, anger, etc. about the new baby. However, I also know that children model behavior, even that which is found in the books we read to them. If you introduce them to the idea that they're going to be left out and made to wait when their new sibling comes along, they will be expecting trouble and the resentment depicted in the book will almost surely become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I absolutely believe in allowing, even ENCOURAGING, children to voice negative feelings; I just feel it's counter-productive and unnecessary to introduce them before they crop up on their own. So, to the reviewer who plans to give this book as a gift to all the expectant parents she knows, I implore you to stick to the parents' registry. It is much more respectful of their wishes to do so. Just because you think this book would be valuable for them does not mean they will agree. This book was a gift to me from someone who thought we would enjoy it and it was just a waste of money. I could really use more crib sheets though! Registry...

Also, speaking of modeling behavior... Any parent sensitive enough to be cruising Amazon looking for a good book to help a daughter prepare for her new sibling would not exhibit the kind of cruel neglect of the daughter's feelings that you see in this book. I have much more of a problem with the behavior of the parents in this book than I do with the big sister's behavior. Who can blame the poor girl for the resentment she's experiencing?

Yes, a child having a new sibling has been compared to a husband or wife bringing a new spouse home. However, it's not exactly that extreme or fewer people would do it, some several times over. Also, I don't see myself EVER frolicking with my husband's new wife in the sandbox or us happily tooling around after each other on tricycles a mere two years after our introduction. Kids adjust because we prepare them and nurture them and express to them in a myriad of ways that siblings are a gift to one another. Even if the comparison was accurate, the logical conclusion should not be to tell a child, "Oh, yeah, it's going to be wretched and you'll be second fiddle for a while but don't worry because it will get better." The solution is to prepare them with some information about the needs of new babies and then to do your absolute best to give them an abundance of love and attention once the new baby comes. I'm on my third and I truly haven't found it that big of a challenge to make time and room on my lap for my older ones--many times even while nursing the newborn. Yes, the house is in shambles sometimes and I can get pretty exhausted but the priority here is taking good care of all three of my babies.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Our Daugher & Big Sister Loves This Book, September 2, 2007

By 

E. Giromini (Chicago, IL) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Big Sister Now: A Story about Me and Our New Baby (Paperback)

Our daughter was 3 yrs & 1 week old when our son was born and we bought this book because it was about a big sister with a little brother. Our daughter loves this book and so do we. We do not think that it is negative - rather realistic in that there will be frustrations and adjustments that the older child will have to make when the baby arrives. She recites the parts about being patient and having special time with Mommy and Daddy. She has been reading the book for over 6 months now and continues to enjoy it. We really loves the illustrations - the "big sister" wears a dress-up skirt over her PJs and our daughter does this all of the time. We strongly recommend this book as our family has greatly enjoyed it.

10 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The BEST book for bringing a baby home I've seen!, July 20, 2006

By 

Sandra Warren "Parent Advocate" (Ohio) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Big Sister Now: A Story about Me and Our New Baby (Hardcover)

"Big Sister Now" is on my list of "gotta haves" and "gotta give" to all friends and friends'kids who are bringing second and third and forth babies home to older sibblings. The story is so engaging, the senarios realistic. The character gives a voice and permission to older sibblings who may not know how to positively express what they're feeling. This book is sure to delight, educate and open doors of communication between parents and the older sibbling.

For those concerned about the negative face of the character let me remind you what the noted (late) child psychologist, Dr. Hiam Ginott (Between Parent and Child)said about bringing a second baby home. He believed that is was like your husband bringing home another woman and telling you that you'll love it because she'll help with the cooking, housework and babysitting.
He believe that ALL children harbor feelings of displacement whether they appear to express them or not. The child willing to happily fetch diapers and bottles and even those expressing "I love the baby" may ONLY be doing it to please Mommy and Daddy, not because they feel that way.

The beauty in "Big Sister Now," is that through the adorable main character, children are NOT given negative ideas but rather given a VOICE and PERMISSION to express what they may really be feeling. As tough as it is for us as parents to accept, children do feel displaced, and if they are harboring feelings of resentment, it's healthier to give them a positive avenue for expression. "Big Sister Now" doesn't tell children how they should be feeling, it allows children to express what may already be inside their head.

The illustrations are amazingly fresh. The back story in all the illustrations is wonderfully clever. Anyone who is a mother can relate to the dishelveled house. So much more is happening within the illustrations than in the story itself.

"Big Sister Now" is on my "MUST HAVE" list!