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Bite Me: A Love Story [Hardcover]

Christopher Moore (Author)
4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (123 customer reviews)


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Book Description

March 23, 2010

The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public.

Whoa. And this is a love story? Yup. 'Cept there's no whining. See, while some lovers were born to run, Jody and Tommy were born to bite. Well, reborn, that is, now that they're vampires. Good thing theirs is an undying love, since their Goth Girl Friday, Abby Normal, imprisoned them in a bronze statue.

Abby wants to be a bloodsucking fiend, too, but right now she's really busy with other stuff, like breaking in a pair of red vinyl thigh-high Skankenstein® platform boots and wrangling her Ph.D.-candidate boyfriend, Steve (the love monkey). And then there's that vampire cat Chet, who's getting bigger and smarter—and thirstier—by the minute. Abby thought she and Steve could handle the kitty cat on their own, mais non . . .

Before you can say "OMG! WTF?" Tommy and Jody are sprung from captivity, and join forces with Abby, Steve, the frozen-turkey-bowling Safeway crew, the Emperor of San Francisco and his trusty dogs Lazarus and Bummer, Abby's gay Goth friend Jared, and SF's finest Cavuto and Rivera to hunt big cat and save the city. And that's when the fun really begins.

--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Editorial Reviews

Review

“Moore proves he has few rivals on the humour-opus front with this high-larious romp that just might have driven the final nail into old Nosferatu’s coffin.” (Ottawa Citizen on BITE ME )

“Moore’s twisted take on the undead comes as a welcome respite from the recent spate of TV, film and book offerings to bombard us.” (Edmonton Journal on BITE ME )

“Moore’s most hysterical ‘love story’ to date.” (Booklist )

“I can’t emphasize enough how funny BITE ME is.” (Bookreporter.com )

“Moore carved a niche in the horror-comedy genre, and anyone with a fiendish sense of humor will love his writing.” (Florida Times-Union on BITE ME )

About the Author

Christopher Moore is the author of twelve previous novels: Practical Demonkeeping, Coyote Blue, Bloodsucking Fiends, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, Fluke, The Stupidest Angel, A Dirty Job, You Suck, Fool, and Bite Me. He lives in San Francisco, California.

--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 320 pages
  • Publisher: William Morrow; 1 edition (March 23, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0061779725
  • ISBN-13: 978-0061779725
  • Product Dimensions: 7.6 x 5.3 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (123 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #308,998 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Christopher Moore is the author of eleven previous novels: Practical Demonkeeping, Coyote Blue, Bloodsucking Fiends, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, Fluke, The Stupidest Angel, A Dirty Job, You Suck, and Fool. He lives in San Francisco.

 

Customer Reviews

123 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
4.0 out of 5 stars (123 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

75 of 79 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Rawr is totally a thing..., January 22, 2010
This review is from: Bite Me: A Love Story (Hardcover)
Customer review from the Amazon Vine™ Program (What's this?)
In my rave review of Moore's last novel, Fool, I implied that his novels inspired by Shakespeare and the Bible are more substantive than his fluffier San Francisco/Pine Cove novels. This latest novel, Bite Me, has me rethinking that statement. Funny, it is. Fluffy, it is not. Bite Me is the third (and final?) novel in the Bloodsucking Fiends series. The first novel in a great series is always special because it's our introduction to a new world. That said, this latest installment just might be the best. What I can tell you is this: I found it to be darker, scarier, more suspenseful, and at least as funny as the previous novels. And in addition to all of the above, it's genuinely moving. These characters have been my friends for more than a decade now. I've grown to care about them.

The novel opens pretty much in the immediate wake of You Suck. The opening chapter is the first of many that are narrated by the unforgettable Abby Normal, self-proclaimed "emergency back-up mistress of the greater Bay Area night." Abby begins by providing a dizzying (and helpful) recap of the first two novels, but I'd strongly suggest you read Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story and You Suck: A Love Story before tackling this one. She and Foo Dog still inhabit the "love lair." Jody and Tommy are still encased in bronze. Chet, the huge shaved vampire cat is on the prowl. And all of our favorite San Franciscans are back: the Emperor, Bummer, and Lazarus; the Animals; cops Rivera and Cavuto; the folks from Asher's Secondhand Store; and others. And Moore fans, a beloved past character who's never shown up in San Francisco before makes an unexpected appearance in a supporting role. Be careful what you read about this novel. It would be a shame to ruin the surprise!

I don't want to summarize the plot. It's too crazy, it lurches in all sorts of unexpected directions, and why should I ruin your fun? What I can tell you is that I was completely surprised by the novel's ending. Earlier I said this novel is darker, scarier, and more suspenseful. (At this point I should admit that I'm a total wuss who's afraid of horror movies and rollercoasters.) Still, characters are placed in real jeopardy. Not all will survive. And I was definitely on the edge of my seat for large stretches of the novel. That Moore can maintain this level of tension while being spit-milk-out-your-nose funny is astonishing. I didn't actually spit any milk out of my nose. I read this novel while laid up with the flu. Every time I laughed out loud it started a coughing jag. I nearly coughed up a lung, but I just couldn't put it down! If that's not a recommendation, what is?

Despite aphorisms about old dogs and new tricks, I have to say it: I think Chris Moore is getting better. I've been a hardcore fan for years, and that is saying quite a bit.
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24 of 27 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Abby-Dabba-Do!, January 30, 2010
This review is from: Bite Me: A Love Story (Hardcover)
Customer review from the Amazon Vine™ Program (What's this?)
Who, but Christopher Moore, can give you a book with both tender moments, and fart jokes? Nobody I can think of, and that's one of the things that makes him so brilliant.

In Bite Me, we return to the streets of San Francisco, (as much a character in the book as the humans ... and the various assorted other creatures), picking up where You Suck: A Love Story left off. Much of the book is told from the perspective of Abby Normal, and OMFG I LOVE HER!

I found this book to be slightly more sophisticated than the previous two. A novel you can really (ready?) sink your teeth into. And I'm not just saying that because the pun works. With all the vampire fiction out there these days, vampire lore can get really tired. There were some unique aspects in this book which really put a fresh spin on things, and frankly some fun kind of sciencey stuff that gave it some of that aforementioned substance.

Never to be taken for granted, and always worthy of mention is Moore's humor. The book started funny, it stayed funny, it ended funny. So many "comic" novels have laugh out loud starts, which sort of dwindle away as the story progresses. Not so with Bite Me. Many, many, laugh out loud moments.

Do you have to have read Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story and You Suck to read this one? Probably not, there's enough background information given, but why wouldn't you?
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars A Toothy New Addition To Moore's Slacker Vampire Trilogy, February 20, 2010
This review is from: Bite Me: A Love Story (Hardcover)
Customer review from the Amazon Vine™ Program (What's this?)
He's back! Christopher Moore returns to the city by the bay with his latest chapter of love, absurdity and vampirism in his uniquely original take on the underbelly of San Francisco. Moore's demented vision of the city he loves is a common denominator in many of his novels and several of its wacky environs wander into and out of unrelated books. But "Bite Me" reassembles all the players of his previous success stories "Bloodsucking Fiends" and "You Suck" and continues all the drama (OK, not so much), the romance (sort of) and the farce (definitely) that only Moore can deliver.

If you've read the prior books in the trilogy--you pretty much know what to expect from this lightweight comedic romp. If you haven't, however, this is NOT the place to start! Go back and sample "Bloodsucking Fiends" and proceed from there. "Fiends" set the standard for modern slacker vampire love stories and fans of that book and its sequel will surely be eager to devour (nifty pun, huh?) "Bite Me." Countess Jody, Dark Lord Tommy Flood, Goth minion Abby Normal, and all the other eccentric characters are back to do battle with a new calamity threatening San Fran. Chet, an enormous shaved vampire cat, is creating an army of hungry vampire kitties that are stalking the most vulnerable of the city's inhabitants. They've got to be stopped to keep the supernatural underworld from going public. I was going to say "in the dark" but let's not overuse those delightful puns. Adding to the problem, some previous foes also show up to keep things quiet in a most foul-intentioned way. Will our love starved heroes prevail? Will they even survive?

"Bite Me" is action packed and filled with laughs. It is ridiculous and delightful--the conception of Chet alone is worth the price of admission. "Bite Me" will breeze by as a quick and amusing read. And that's great! If you love these characters, check it out. But as I referenced earlier, this is not a starting point to new initiates of the Moore oeuvre. To enjoy all of its charms, you should start from the beginning. More comedic style than actual substance, however, "Bite Me" falls a little short of recent Christopher Moore titles. Coming off the highly ambitious "Fool" (one of my favorites of last year) and the strangely heartfelt "A Dirty Job," which shares some of the "Bite Me" characters, this is more of a throw-back to an earlier, simpler times. But that's OK--I live in a world where any Moore is good Moore!
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