Start reading Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story on the free Kindle Reading App or on your Kindle in under a minute. Don't have a Kindle? Get your Kindle here.

Deliver to your Kindle or other device

Enter a promotion code
or gift card

Try it free

Sample the beginning of this book for free

Deliver to your Kindle or other device

Sorry, this item is not available in
Image not available for
Image not available

Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story [Kindle Edition]

Christopher Moore
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (307 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $16.00
Kindle Price: $11.99
You Save: $4.01 (25%)
Sold by: Simon and Schuster Digital Sales Inc
This price was set by the publisher

Free Kindle Reading App Anybody can read Kindle books—even without a Kindle device—with the FREE Kindle app for smartphones, tablets and computers.

To get the free app, enter your email address or mobile phone number.

Kindle Daily Deals
Kindle Delivers: Daily Deals
Subscribe to find out about each day's Kindle Daily Deals for adults and young readers. Learn more (U.S. customers only)

Book Description

Jody never asked to become a vampire. But when she wakes up under an alley Dumpster with a badly burned arm, an aching back, superhuman strength, and a distinctly Nosferatuan thirst, she realizes the decision has been made for her.

Making the transition from the nine-to-five grind to an eternity of nocturnal prowlings is going to take some doing, however, and that's where C. Thomas Flood fits in. A would-be Kerouac from Incontinence, Indiana, Tommy (to his friends) is biding his time night-clerking and frozen-turkey bowling in a San Francisco Safeway. But all that changes when a beautiful undead redhead walks through the door...and proceeds to rock Tommy's life -- and afterlife -- in ways he never thought possible.

Editorial Reviews Review

Here's something different: a vampire novel that's light, funny, and not at all hackneyed. Between scenes of punks bowling frozen turkeys on the graveyard shift in a supermarket, or snapping turtles loose in a loft and gnawing on designer shoes, this novel has comic charm to spare. But it also packs an appealingly downbeat message about the consumer culture: Becoming a vampire has given the twentysomething heroine "a crampless case of rattlesnake PMS"--a grumpy mood in which she realizes that she can dress to the nines as a "Donner Party Barbie" and still end up disillusioned and unhappy, just another slacker doing her own laundry and watching sucky TV 'til the sun rises.

From Publishers Weekly

Horror, farce and adolescent fantasy mix with uncertain results in this latest offbeat novel from the author of Coyote Blue and Practical Demonkeeping. Attacked on her way home from work in San Francisco's financial district, sexy redhead Jody wakes up under a dumpster and gradually realizes that she has transformed into a vampire. Needing a safe place to hide from daylight and her attacker as she masters her new powers, she turns to Tommy, a 19-year-old aspiring writer from Indiana whom she's just met. Becoming lovers, the two get an apartment together where Tommy avidly studies the mysteries of both vampires and women. But Jody's vampire mentor, Elijah Ben Sapir, who's leaving blood-drained bodies all over the city, has it in for Tommy?as do the cops, who suspect the young man of the killings. With the aid of both the rebellious young misfits he works with and an eccentric homeless man, Tommy aims to vanquish Elijah Ben Sapir in order to save his beloved and himself. Moore's seemingly off-the-cuff narrative and plotting fail to deliver on an imaginative beginning. Despite offering some amusing moments, the author gives little depth to his motley cast of characters and wavers awkwardly between fable and satire.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Product Details

  • File Size: 2210 KB
  • Print Length: 306 pages
  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster; Reprint edition (December 9, 2009)
  • Sold by: Simon and Schuster Digital Sales Inc
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00309CNIA
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #53,778 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
  •  Would you like to give feedback on images?

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
74 of 78 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Kept me up nights... September 25, 2003
Quick personal note; My wife and I have twin 18 month old boys. I stay home with them during the day and work until 1:30 AM. Time is at a premium in my life right now. There's not much to spare and whatever spare time I can get a hold of would most likely be better spent sleeping. That being said, Christopher Moore's Blood Sucking Fiends hooked me the first night I opened the cover and kept me up until nearly 4AM.
I am a long time fan of horror and it would take quite some book to unnerve me to the point of insomnia. It wasn't a late night case of the heeby-jeebies that kept me up. It was the laughter and engaging characters. Moore has a relaxed witty style that translates to a very fast read. All of the characters in Fiends are incredibly likeable (save one) and the story is humorous and engaging. This fresh take on the joys and advantages of being a vampire set in San Franscisco made me want to walk the city and see the sites. I longed to meet a vivacious red-headed blood sucker who would set me up in an apartment and treat me like a cross between Stoker's Renfield and one of Cher's boy toys. I wanted to take the emperor to lunch with his dogs and become engaged to seven Chinese brothers so they could get their green cards. I wanted to work late nights stocking shelves in a supermarket and go bowling with frozen turkeys. (Oh, wait a sec. I have worked in a supermarket overnight and Moore knows exactly what goes on there.)
Christopher Moore weaves all of the above seamlessly and with great humor and affection to create one of the most enjoyable reads of recent memory. More Moore is on it's way to my house as we speak and I can't wait to read his advice on "Practical Demonkeeping" and see what happens in his world when a giant reptile is awakened by radioactive waste in "The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove". I may have a new favorite author.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
45 of 49 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars One of the funniest books I have ever read. January 31, 2002
This book should come with a warning label: Read this book alone! Constant chuckling and laughing out loud in public will lead people to think you are crazy!
Ostensibly, this is a spoof of a "vampire" tale. That's like saying Gone with the Wind was about farm life in the south. It utterly fails to convey the substance of the novel.
That substance is derived from the characters--the usual well defined and full blown whackos that inhabit all of Moore's novels. As with all of Moore's novels the locale is a major character as well, and while most of his work is set in small, quirky towns, this one is set in San Francisco, lending an additional element of urban wackiness to the whole thing.
The thing with Moore that most astounds is his characters are cartoons in many ways-but have no cartoonish sense about them. Instead, they remind you of all your best friends, and, like your best friends, you care about these people. That makes the story compelling and, interestingly, the humor more intense.
Make no mistake--this is light, recreational reading. But is it light, recreational reading of the highest order.
I have read all of Moore's books (save the one just issued) and while all are humorous and enjoyable, this one is his best by far.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
14 of 14 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars SWF seeks romantic nights; idle (very idle) days March 2, 1997
By A Customer
Charmingly naive young man meets, falls in love with, and then finds it's not easy living with a gorgeous vampire. Improvisation is called for in the form of window shades, freeazer chest, and ... snapping turtles??? Angered and menacing vampire gent adds another level of challenge.
Wow! This energetically hilarious story passed the ultimate test: my wife became suspicious when she heard me laughing out loud (something I do every 25,000 books or so). Then she read it and understood. Christopher Moore delivers
fast-paced supernatual hijinks, with a peppering of pinpoint jabs at the inanity of modern urban living. The dialog must be among the wittiest of any American author today. It's one thing to chuckle over a funny quote; a real treat to laugh anew when deadpan rejoinders add a whole new twist to the humor. Add a host of imaginative complications, and the reader had better hang on for this wild jaunt.
Like Moore's other novels (_Coyote Blue_ Practical Demonkeeping_) the satire is decidedly upbeat. He manages to let the redemptive qualities of his characters sneak through all the farcical shenanigans. As a result, you'll cheer for these night-shift kids as they stumble all over themselves (and a few bodies) to find true happiness. A book easily finished before sunrise!
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
25 of 30 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Love Bites. December 19, 2005
Christopher Moore wanted to write horror books; he dreamed of being the next Stephen King. Unfortunately for him but fortunately for us, people laughed when they read what he wrote. Thus was born a humorist of the caliber of Dave Barry or Christopher Buckley and some have gone so far as to say he is the next Kurt Vonnegut. Now that we know a bit about our Author, what about the book?
Bloodsucking Fiends is a glorious romp through the night. We have an office worker, Jodi, who has a 9-to-5 dead-end office job in San Francisco, and wakes up one morning under a dumpster and the sun burns her and she has super human strength. She has never watched vampire movies or read the books, so she doesn't know what to do or how to do it. She is on the hunt for the man/creature who turned her.
This is where C. Thomas Flood comes in, a beatnik author from Indiana, who works midnights at the Safeway. He falls in love with Jodi immediately, and realizes that there is something strange about his love.
Follow the humorous journey through the night, the underworld, the streets and alleys of San Francisco as Thomas tries to find a way to be with the woman he loves even if she is undead. And Jodi tries to find out what being undead is all about. Can this love survive? And if you've enjoyed this one, check out his other writings: Island of the Sequined Love Nun, or The Lusty Lizard of Melancholy Cove.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars Read It!
Very good book. Well worth the read. It's the first of his vampire books and introduces most of the characters for this series. Really comical in Moore's usual offbeat fashion.
Published 11 days ago by R. Miller
4.0 out of 5 stars thought this was a fun book to read and had been recommended by a ...
thought this was a fun book to read and had been recommended by a friend. took me awhile to get into it, due to it being a different type of writing than what i'm use to. Read more
Published 21 days ago by ms charlie denes
4.0 out of 5 stars BSF Is A Quick Read That Will Have You Laughing Out Loud
Having read the Pine Cove trilogy, the first few chapters of Sacre Bleu that were included in Stupidest Angel, and now BSF, Christopher Moore has become one of my favorite authors. Read more
Published 21 days ago by Vinny
5.0 out of 5 stars Neat and Different
An excellent, and somewhat different approach to the whole vampire genre. A very good read.
Published 1 month ago by iain777
2.0 out of 5 stars ehhh
It was just ok. I don't think I will be reading the sequel.
Published 1 month ago by weasel5626
4.0 out of 5 stars I would recommend reading it for the humor, but maybe not the lore.
I can't say that the vampire lore in this book strays from the traditional. Even the books of Anne Rice and Bram Stoker are referenced in the story. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Delta Stet
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Funny and a fun read!
Published 3 months ago by Cynthia Robinson
5.0 out of 5 stars One of my absolutely favorite authors and series
Item arrived as described. One of my absolutely favorite authors and series. The fact that it takes place in San Francisco and most of the locales referenced are actually pretty on... Read more
Published 3 months ago by Ronnie Twist
3.0 out of 5 stars Like Cheetos for the brain--you want it when you want it, but it's not...
This book was cute. Adorable. A definite beach read. Moore does well with character and dialogue. I gave it 3 stars because it didn't move me in such a way that I feel compelled to... Read more
Published 3 months ago by JulieAnn Carter-Winward
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Fantastically silly and smartly written.
Published 4 months ago by Melissa
Search Customer Reviews

More About the Author

Christopher Moore is the author of eleven previous novels: Practical Demonkeeping, Coyote Blue, Bloodsucking Fiends, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, Fluke, The Stupidest Angel, A Dirty Job, You Suck, and Fool. He lives in San Francisco.

What Other Items Do Customers Buy After Viewing This Item?


There are no discussions about this product yet.
Be the first to discuss this product with the community.
Start a new discussion
First post:
Prompts for sign-in

Look for Similar Items by Category