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Boneyard Babies [Paperback]

Alan M Clark
5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)

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Book Description

October 10, 2010
Boneyard babies, gather round! Come suckle the Musty Cow's Teat of Death! A man searches for his lover in a medical laboratory where people are transformed into nightmarish mutants. An undead prostitute enters the underworld to face off against a jackal-headed god. A woman incarcerated for her lipstick addiction must eat her own limbs or face imminent death. A tumor recounts its life with a man named Applewide. In the morbidly surreal universe of World Fantasy Award-winner Alan M. Clark, there are only two types of people: those who are monsters, and those who are eaten by monsters. Proceed with caution.


Editorial Reviews

From the Author

The Author's Note from the front of BONEYARD BABIES:

There are two types of stories in this collection, ones that make sense and ones that do not. I'll let the ones that do make sense speak for themselves. The ones that do not deserve a little explanation and with it a little history.

I am primarily a visual artist, but in the 1970s while living and going to school in San Francisco, I began to write as yet another means of creative expression. I smoked marihuana with my roommate and then we'd tried to write bizarre stories. It was fun collaborating and laughing about what we came up with. Our tendency was to try to write a solid story with a beginning, middle and end, an antagonist, a protagonist, conflict and resolution. But being high, it was difficult for me to focus on telling a character-driven story that didn't wander off and get lost in the thick forest of my imagination. I think he had the same problem. Over time we became frustrated as the unfinished, hopeless stories piled up.

The solution was to stop making sense. Being a surrealist at heart, I believe in the power of the subconscious to offer up creative solutions. I proposed to my roommate a writing game that would prevent us from concentrating on creating reasonable story elements.

The process put us in a position of having to find a story through free-association. What we ended up with definitely did not make sense in a conventional way, but it felt like a story and seemed complete. When reading it, my imagination did it's best to assign meaning to the text, creating a surreal cartoon of sorts for my mind's eye.

Here are the rules of the game I call Bone-Grubber's Gamble:

1) Two writers each create ten partial sentences of bizarre content and then trade them with one another.
2) A simple open-ended premise for a story is agreed upon (My roommate and I decided the first one of these we wrote would be about TWO BEST FRIENDS WHO HATE EACH OTHER).
3) A coin is flipped to see who will go first.
4) The winning writer chooses one of his counterpart's sentences and begins the story. The sentence can be kept as is and completed or changed in any way or it could be just a spring board for ideas. Sentences don't have to make sense, but they should still have good structure.
When the first writer is finished, the other writer takes a turn and they alternate turns until the story finds its own end. This usually occurs within the first two pages. As the writers take turns, they keep in mind that connective tissue in the form of repeated words and concepts helps tie sentences, paragraphs and ultimately the story together and give a sense that the story is whole even if it is truly nonsensical.

Below is an example of a set of partial sentences of bizarre content that I generated this year while looking through a book on torture devices. I sent them to Eric M. Witchey to use when we wrote the story titled "Conrad's New Shoe Goo."

1) where harmless humans, roasted and boiled to little cubes
2) every apology a death penalty
3) fervent prayers became an iron gag and a drunkard of gin
4) four claws and a high-end adultery appliance
5) a heresy of corn dogs and chocolate-dipped
6) hankered after the older and more popular atrocities
8) bespectacled himself by stretching out his (censored)
7) would have four testicles instead of the usual tub of lard
9) hadn't screamed puppet warnings in over a decade
10) wake unto waist rings and pyramid points

This is not about the story. After all, some of them don't make sense. It's about how nimble the imagination is, that of the writers' combined with yours.

The table of contents is broken into three sections. The first, titled Older, more Popular Atrocities, is made up of stories that are more traditional and are not arrived at by means of the Bone-Grubber's Gamble. The second section, A Heresy of Corn-Dogs, is composed of stories that were arrived at by means of the Bone-Grubber's Gamble, but developed with an eye toward making more traditional stories. The third section is pure Bone-Grubber's Gamble. Several of these stories I wrote by myself. This required me to assemble at least twenty partial sentences and to pretend to be two writer.

--Alan M. Clark

From the Inside Flap

"If you think Alan Clark's art is darkly delightful, just wait until you read his twisted and fantastical tales. I promise it will make weird and wonderful pictures in your head. And isn't that what we all really want?" - ANN VANDERMEER, Hugo Award-winning Editor of Weird Tales

"Alan Clark has one wicked sense of humor." - ELIZABETH MASSIE, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of Sineater.

"We all know Alan Clark is one hell of an artist - in fact, one of the best the imaginative field has ever produced. Turns out he's one hell of a writer, too. If that's not a one-two punch that will knock you out I don't know what is." - AL SARRANTONIO, editor of 999 and Stories (with Neil Gaiman)


Product Details

  • Paperback: 180 pages
  • Publisher: Eraserhead Press (October 10, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1936383217
  • ISBN-13: 978-1936383214
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.4 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,798,032 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Alan M. Clark grew up in Tennessee in a house full of bones and old medical books. He has a Bachelor of Fine Arts from the San Francisco Art Institute. His illustrations have appeared in books of fiction, non-fiction, textbooks, young adult fiction and children's books. Awards for his illustration work include the World Fantasy Award and four Chesley Awards. His short fiction has appeared in magazines, anthologies, and three collections. Six of his novels have been published. Clark's publishing company, IFD Publishing, has released six traditional books and nineteen ebooks. He and his wife, Melody, live in Oregon.
www.alanmclark.com

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars
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Each story is a world of imagination. Captain Satan  |  3 reviewers made a similar statement
I think this book will surprise all readers, and inspire anyone with an artistic sensibility. Michael Arnzen  |  1 reviewer made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Definitely worthwhile December 14, 2010
Format:Paperback
Alan M. Clark is well known as one of the best genre artists in the business, but what some people don't know is that he's also an amazing author. I was first introduced to his work when I read the Bram Stoker Award nominated novel Siren Promised co-written with the immensely talented Jeremy Robert Johnson, which was an amazing work of surrealism that read like his artwork brought to left. This collection of stories is no different. Each story is a world of imagination. Some of the stories are incredibly strange, and read like crazy dreams. Others are just fun, imaginative reads. Check this book out, especially if you are a fan of his artwork and want to discover what else this man's mind is capable of.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Babies That Bite April 21, 2011
Format:Paperback
In Boneyard Babies, Alan Clark, the accomplished creator of surreal,
horrific, and generally weird graphic art, has teamed up with several
of his strangest friends to produce a collection of short fictions
that share the underlying weirdness which those familiar with his
artwork have come to relish.

Boneyard Babies is an up-front work of Bizarro fiction - not stories
about Superman's cracked-mirror image, but pieces ("stories" is too
restrictive a term to describe some of Clark & Co.'s infants) born of
horror fiction, dark fantasy, black comedy, and mysterious parentages
no genrified DNA test can ever bring to justice. These are visions
seen through eyes that have watched too many B movies through too many
late nights, tales spun by imaginations that have reveled in gore,
schlock, and the sheer unseemliness of it all until a certain kind of
sense began to emerge from what was once only odd.

The book's handy, user-friendly layout begins with straightforward
narratives (straightforward narratives about really odd things, that
is), some of which partake of the spirit of "Twilight Zone" or at
least "Tales from the Dark Side" episodes. Keep turning the pages,
and the fantastic becomes more fantastical (sometimes uproariously so)
while logic, should logic concern you, becomes less of a universal
syndrome and more of a symptom specific to a particular story, or to
part of story, or to a paragraph ... Finally there are pieces that
almost, kind of make sense, in places - you think you've got it, then
the story gives a wriggle and slithers through your mind's fingers
back into the swamp.

Boneyard Babies comes complete with an explanation and even a bit of
theory - stories of a different kind that purport to tell us how the
perpetrators went about fashioning their art. Don't get the idea from
this that the book is a literary exercise, the sort of thing you read
for the good of your intellectual soul or to pad your PoMo street
cred. Far from it: Boneyard Babies is fun. You'll be entertained,
amused, threatened, and confused. What a deal.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Like Curdled Breast-Milk July 10, 2011
By JP
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
Alan M. Clark's art has been haunting me for over 20 years. From the moment I first laid eyes upon his work, the pieces burnt their impressions into my mind, giving me horrid dreams, and just plain creeping me out! And if the art wasn't terrifying enough, Alan had to go and start writing, putting his twisted creations down in words, so that they're no longer immortally trapped in a painting, now the little perverse monsters are up and lurking through page after page! But it's awesome fun! 'Boneyard Babies' is like a cold weather ride down a little dirt road through the woods with a headlight out. It's a book that catches you off guard on different levels, making you say, 'What the Hell?', and making your facial expression change from pale to sour. Alan's prose is out there in left field, and you won't be disappointed. So, for cryin' out loud, do what I did, buy the ticket and ride the ride, and replace the bulb in your nightlight!
James R. Powell
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