Customer Reviews

Booze Battle

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When I was doing alcoholism interventions in the eighties, I would buy this book by the case from Ballantine. It was a must read for family members and friends before we intervened to help the alcoholic. It is written for the lay person and is easy to read and understand. This book helps dispel the myth "You can't help an alcoholic unless he wants help". It also teaches the importance of having a professional orchestrate the intervention.

"The Booze Battle" is THE BEST book on this subject for the loved ones of an alcoholic. Ruth Maxwell, as recovering alcoholic herself, writes in very clear language, making it easy to understand not just the toll alcoholism takes on the family and loved ones, but also what it's like to BE the alcoholic. I think that section of the book was the biggest eye opener for me, because it described my husband to a "T". Part of learning to live with an alcoholic involves understanding how they see themselves and how they see the world. Before this book I took my husband's drinking very personally. This was especially so because he tried to blame me for his binges. But after reading it (over and over, believe me!) I can separate myself emotionally from the situation, see it for what it is.

I first read this book about 18 years ago. Prior to this book I tried Al-Anon (which was a waste of time for me), therapy (there's a joke - the person who is NOT sick getting the therapy), and read countless other books. But this book, and her sequel "Beyond The Booze Battle" were amazingly helpful! Did my husband stop drinking? No. But I stopped taking responsibility for it, I stopped trying to change him, I stopped covering for him, and I stopped letting the nonsense get to me. This is not the message of her book, however. She does talk about getting the alcoholic into recovery, and that seems to be the goal of this book. Her sequel is more about living with the "dry drunk." But since our family failed to get my husband to stop, even divorcing him didn't work, now we can have him in our lives and not allow him to bring us down. My kids (now grown) realize he's an alcoholic, they realize THEY may be alcoholics, and they have made commitments to not drink. We're not obnoxious about it. We just don't drink.

If you love someone who is an alcoholic and want to stop the madness in your own head, read this book.

I HAVE COME BACK TO THIS BOOK SEVERAL TIMES OVER THE YEARS,
AND OFFER IT TO FRIENDS WHO ARE FACING WHAT I FACED ALMOST TWO DECADES
AGO WITH MY WIFE, HTE ADDICTED AND ME THE ENABLIER.

THE SECTION ON PRIMITVIE DEFENSE SYSTEMS RELIEVES THE SANE AND LOGICAL
PERSON, ( IE THE ENABLER (ME) WHO IS BEAT BY THE DISABLIER THE LOVED ONE YOU CAN'T REACH)11 OUT OF 10 TIMES ) WITH A CLEAR EXPLAINATION AS TO WHY
ALL MY LOGIC, RATIONALITY, AND THREATENING NEVER MEANT ANYTHING INCHANGING HER, OR A DIFFERENCE UNTIL I UDERSTOOD JUST HOW ILL THE PERSON WAS WITH A COMPLETE AND PERFECT SYSTEM DEFENSE SYSTEM WITH RULES ONLY THE PERSON WHO NEEDS THE HELP LIVES BY.

THIS BOOK IS NOT A CURE OR THE ANSWER. HOWEVER IT GAVE INTELLIGENT INSIGHT TO PEOPLE LIKE MYSELF, TO TAKE ACTION AND FIND A SOLUTION TO
HELPING THE ADDICT OUT OF THE HOLE THEY ARE IN, AND KEEPING YOU AND I
FROM FALLING IN AND BECOMING PART OF THEIR WORLD THAT ISN'T WORKING.

ITS NOT THE "WORD" LOVE THAT MATTERS. ITS BEING ABLE TAKE THE POWER OF YOUR LOVE AND APPLY IT SUCCESSFULLY.

This is the first book I read about alcoholism, the dynamics, and how to approach it, especially as a family member or friend. It was informative and to the point. This is a handbook that can be used to actually face the disease and come to terms with it. Very valuable.

this book was a lifesaver, i lent it to a friend and my dog chewed it up but i will not dis ard it until i replace it, and i am not in an alcoholic situation now-which attests to its strength. id like to say thanks to this book but god helped also. this book was a lifesaver and it helped to keep me on track , it wont make it easy, but it will remind you of the hard work you must do. and when you forget what you are doing or why it will agian remind you. i am now looking to replace my copy. it is a small book only 150 pages and can fit in a purse but well worth the money!! good guidance never gets old or outdated. please read this if you are looking for a way out, feel alone, don't know where to turn or need help and can no longer do what you are doing.