Customer Reviews

Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship

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Joshua Harris has grown in both wisdom and maturity between the time I KISSED DATING GOODBYE was published and BOY MEETS GIRL was published. The first book had some valid points; you should be friends with someone before you date them, you should only date someone you might want to eventually marry, etc. However, much of the book provides very little insight for people who have always dated (or courted) from a Biblical perspective. I didn't enjoy reading IKDG very much and got very little out of it. It seemed to me that the underlying message of the book was that if you "date" and don't "court" your wrong.However, BOY MEETS GIRL is different. Realizing the mistakes of his first book, Harris has written something more useful and practical. To begin with, Harris no longer makes a distinction between "dating" and "courting" as he did in IKDG. Secondly, Harris emphasizes that there is no set pattern, guidelines, or rules to follow to meet and date/court your future mate; God never does something the same way twice. Finally, and probably most importantly, Harris more clearly illustrates than he did in IKDG that as people we cannot look to another person to complete us. Husbands and wives can only complement each other, they can't complete each other, only Jesus can do that. The book also has a lot of useful hints and a few of the stories are quite amazing. A much better book than I KISSED DATING GOODBYE.

It should come as no surprise to those who have read Joshua Harris' first book, I Kissed Dating Goodbye, that Boy Meets Girl would be filled with sound, biblical advice and stories that can relate to life. Joshua Harris has once again delivered a book on a topic sorely needed by the Christian singles of this world. As an 18 year old who had been a Christian for two months, I purchased IKDG, unsure of where it would lead me. I knew my way of doing things was about to be challenged, but I didn't realize just how much. As I dove into the book, I was convicted in so many ways. God used this to really shape me and my understanding of how He wants me to be in relation to this important area of my life. As someone who has read MANY of these Christian relationship books, I can tell you that there are some good ones out there, but IKDG definitely had the biggest impact on me. However, as I continued to pray over the biblical truths that Harris focused on and how they pertained to my individual life, I (along with thousands others) had to wonder one thing - What about when I *do* find someone who I'd like to pursue a relationship with? Then what? The answer has arrived. Joshua Harris uses Boy Meets Girl to express how God has shown him that it is the state of our heart that matters most, and not legalistic boundaries. Though the book just arrived in my mailbox yesterday, I have torn right through it and been pouring over the scripture referenced that addresses so many pertinent issues. If you loved IKDG, get ready for Boy Meets Girl. Harris has so beautifully expressed the way that God has worked in his life and heart, and this manifestation is definitely something that our generation can use.

Mr. Harris is obviously a sincere Christian and a gifted writer. What impresses me the most about this book is his willingness to acknowledge that yes, people make mistakes, that no mistake is irredeemable in the eyes of God, and that life and the Lord often throws us curves we do not expect. In this respect, he's a welcome relief from what I call the "Do It My Way" writers such as Wendy Shalit and Danielle Crittenden. Most of his practical advice (restricting physical contact, being answerable to others, etc.) is excellent.

But...I still have a few issues with this book. I'm a 31-year-old Christian, happily married for the past decade to another Christian. As a 10-year "veteran" I'd like to say that Mr. Harris has a definite tendency to romanticize marriage. Yes, it is wonderful, but no matter how strong one's faith in God is, there will be in-law trouble, fights over who takes out the trash, issues with money, illness, and just about everything else. That's not to say that overcoming these problems is not one of life's greatest rewards--it is. But I wish he'd dealt a bit more with the practical issues that two people need to sort out before marriage. It's one thing to delay physical and emotional intimacy until you're ready for it, but if you get married to someone without discussing finances, caring for aging parents, child-rearing, and so forth, you are setting yourself up for a good deal more trouble than if you got carried away kissing. Also, and I suspect this is due to his youth, he doesn't seem to recognize that one needs a certain richness of life experience before one can be ready to choose a spouse. I'm not talking about sin here--just being open to the experiences God has to give us.

With this said, I must add that Mr. Harris displays an impressive amount of maturity for his age, and I wish him and his bride all the best.

Josh Harris' books (Boy Meets Girl and IKDG) have truly been inspired by God. Evidence that they "work" is seen in Josh's love and devotion to Sharon (his wife). I pray to someday have a relationship as fulfilling as theirs. As a Christian girl who lost her virginity at 18, and became pregnant, married, divorced, and a single mother this year at age 19, i needed a new, FRESH perspective on sex. It was obvious that the world's ideas were wrong... very wrong. The chapters on purity and overcoming past sins have helped me to forgive myself, AND give me something to look forward to in the future. I wish I'd read these books in highschool. So far, I've bought 2 more copies of Boy Meets Girl, and 3 copies of I Kissed Dating Goodbye. I'm lending them out to everyone i can think of, INCLUDING my ex-husband. Buy the books, Read the books, and Share the books. Stop "dating" and experience the sheer JOY of trusting in the Lord.

Although Joshua Harris is a little more conservative than I, the theme of this book is outstanding. In sum, Harris proclaims that the intended relationship for a man and woman is marriage, and that this union should be God-blessed, God-honoring, and God-centered. As Harris says,

"A godly marriage is a man and a woman, side by side in the hand of God's providence, gazing up to Him." Beautiful.

Harris blends very interesting love stories with topics that are vital for people thinking about marriage. These include dating, communications, man and woman's role, sex, past relationships, community involvement in the relationship, and ten questions to ask before you get married. One major point that Harris weaves throughout the book is that marriage should be the goal in the relationship, not just "dating to date."

Some of what Harris says might sound shockingly conservative. Harris waited until his wedding day to kiss his bride. But Harris makes a point to say that this may not be for everyone. What is important is that you make rules and guidelines to follow so that in your relationship you are not overcome with lust.

For many women who have been taught 'the rules' by their friends and sisters, it's refreshing to hear of guy who did not have to be lured into marriage. It's exciting to think of the possibility there are men out there who really do want to get to know a woman as a true friend.

Myself being a new believer, I've spent lots of time searching for books on how exactly this dating thing works as a christian. Isn't the point of dating to see if you're compatible in all areas before deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone? This book gave me the confidence to really know I'm able to make my own choice about being sexually intimate with someone and stick with it. As odd as it sounds, young women are almost made to feel ashamed these days if they're not sexually active.

I loved also the reassurance Josh gave about if you expect to be treated like a lady, if you demand to be treated like a lady, you will be. And the man you're with will continue to treat you like one until the day he passes from this earth. Too many times I've found myself settle in the past for a relationship that didn't make me happy, but I wasn't being abused so how could it be that bad? Now I realize the focus of my relationship was way off.

I am a little concerned about how many of the couples in the book only 'courted' for six months to a year before becoming engaged and married. As wonderful as it is to find someone so quickly, most people don't and it gave me a false sense of hope for a few days of "if I follow these rules I can get a guy to marry me within a year!" It took awhile longer before I snapped out of that thinking.

All in all, it is a book I feel every religious young woman should read before heading into the dating world. It is not the bible, you dont need to follow it's every word, but it provides a good general guide to forming your own thoughts about dating. For me personally, I've decided that before I date anyone, I must know them well enough as a friend and christian to sit back and go "now I wonder if we would be a good match for husband and wife."

I have never read any of Josh Harris's books before, but I was really impressed with his new book Boy Meets Girl. My youth pastor and his fiancé read the book together and suggested that my girlfriend and I read it together as well. Josh's book taught me a lot about dating compared to courting, but the main idea to me was not about finding the right girl. The book was really about turning aside a lot of outside interference and focusing on an intimate relationship with God. From that relationship with God then is when we can start praying about that special someone. A lot of things that were laid out in the book seemed to hit me in the heart for some reason, and that's when I knew that this guy was for real with what he talked about. There were a lot of things that took place in the book that my girlfriend and I agreed with, but also there were a few things that we disagreed with. We took the things we disagreed with and tried to consider what it would have been like when we started dating if we could have done the things that Josh did. Of course no two couples are exactly the same and that's what makes all of us unique.
It really hit me to read about other Christian couples that were going through the exact same stuff as what I was going through. I always thought that it was just us. Each individual story about Josh's friends is very good. It's good to see what goes on in other Christian relationships and to see how they confront their lives. To all of the people that read this review I very highly recommend the book Boy Meets Girl by Josh Harris.

This book is the clearest, most biblical book on relationships. Joshua Harris describes the God-centered relationship and is a great guide on how to glorify God in this area. Joshua writes in a very understandable, yet true, tone and makes us readers to desire to be doing God's will, and love the purpose God has for our relationships. It's just GREAT!

This is obviously not the best book in the world. At least the Bible is the best book of all time but this is a good guide book. The writer uses his walk through from friendship to marriage as examples. The writer though states that God is the sole planner of everything and that you have to walk with wisdom and walk in the spirit for God to guide you through.

Very practical ideas, after assessing their weaknesses (Josh and Shannon), they made up rules like they wouldn't kiss till altar and stuff. The ideas and rules they us are not meant for others to follow but just as an example after assessing their weakness. There are minor flaws here and there but a very good guide. I recommend this book to every one who plans to get married someday and also be warned that you could only reap the knowledge out of this book if you're a true Christian.

This book is exactly what our society needs. We have lost the meaning and purpose of dating/courting and in this book, Josh harris draws us back to what it's all about; caring for one another. This book shows that dating is not about what we can get from a relationship, it's about what we can give to the other person as well as walking together towards a common goal.