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The Boys and Girls Book About Divorce [Paperback]

Richard Gardner
2.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)

List Price: $7.99
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Book Description

April 1, 1985 9 and up
Should Your Parents Be Married Even If They're Unhappy With Each Other?



If your parents fuss at you does it mean they don't love you? How can you tell if your father loves you, if he lives in another city? Are you "bad" when you get angry with your mother or father? Why is it a mistake  to talk to one parent about another? Do you blame yourself for your parents' divorce?



This warm and honest book provides reassuring answers to these and many more crucial questions children ask about divorce.

Frequently Bought Together

The Boys and Girls Book About Divorce + Dinosaurs Divorce (A Guide for Changing Families) + Helping Your Kids Cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way
Price for all three: $28.56

Buy the selected items together


Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

Should Your Parents Be Married Even If They're Unhappy With Each Other?

If your parents fuss at you does it mean they don't love you? How can you tell if your father loves you, if he lives in another city? Are you "bad" when you get angry with your mother or father? Why is it a mistake to talk to one parent about another? Do you blame yourself for your parents' divorce?

This warm and honest book provides reassuring answers to these and many more crucial questions children ask about divorce.

From the Inside Flap

Should Your Parents Be Married Even If They're Unhappy With Each Other?



If your parents fuss at you does it mean they don't love you? How can you tell if your father loves you, if he lives in another city? Are you "bad" when you get angry with your mother or father? Why is it a mistake  to talk to one parent about another? Do you blame yourself for your parents' divorce?



This warm and honest book provides reassuring answers to these and many more crucial questions children ask about divorce.

Product Details

  • Age Range: 9 and up
  • Paperback: 192 pages
  • Publisher: Bantam; First Edition edition (April 1, 1985)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0553276190
  • ISBN-13: 978-0553276190
  • Product Dimensions: 4.2 x 0.6 x 7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 2.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #81,488 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

I found this book appalling. tierney lara  |  2 reviewers made a similar statement
When I saw this book,I felt so amazingly. Shuan Chen  |  1 reviewer made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
20 of 21 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Tells it like it is June 24, 2002
Format:Paperback
This book is fantastically un-PC; so much that it verges on shocking. Those who want some bland and reassuring pap for their nearest/dearest child of divorce should look elsewhere.

I know nothing of the author biographically, but I can tell he's seen a lot of unhappy children. He's seen them lied to by adults whose intentions spanned the gamut of good and bad, and seen that misdirection and ephemism hurt children more than directness ever could. In other words, Gardner respects children and understands their need for plain talk. This book advocates for them.

Parents may be offended. But divorces occur more often where fundamental tenets of healthy relationships aren't respected, and things we rarely talk about are done to kids as a matter of course. Kids get used as adult-companionship substitutes. Kids get used as weapons against the Ex, or meal tickets. Parents drift off after the divorce and never drift back again. Parents fawn and drool on birthdays or Christmas and fail to call the rest of the year. To Gardner, this suggests a parent who does not love their child. What does it suggest to you?

The current vogue is pad all this over and "be reassuring," but Gardner prefers to let them in on the truth -- believing truth is something even children can eventually come to terms with.

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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Honesty is the best policy March 15, 2004
Format:Paperback
I noticed this book because of my own miserable childhood.
No adult would like to tell me the truth about my parient's divorce even themselves.There were so many questions in my mind.I have wasted so many time to adjust it. The teachers never taught you how to deal with a divorced family and a sad father. There was no book about it. So, we are helpless.
When I saw this book,I felt so amazingly. This was a book written for us and truely helped us.
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars It influenced me to become a psychologist!! December 4, 1996
By A Customer
Format:Paperback
I read the book 16 years ago and it influenced me to become
a psychologist. I even mentioned the book and Dr. Gardner
in my application essay for graduate school. The book was
easy to understand as a child and I still recommend the book
to my children-patients. I highly recommend the book to
parents and children who are dealing with divorce issues.
The book also contains great illustrations. No book has had
greater influence on my life and career
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
1.0 out of 5 stars The Boys and Girls Book About Divorce
I found this book appalling. At one point the book's the author refers to bad behavior of mothers as not cleaning the home or cooking full meals for their families! Read more
Published 1 day ago by tierney lara
1.0 out of 5 stars Is this still available...for real?
Look up Richard Gardner on the web. He committed suicide and fought against the mandatory reporting of sex abuse of minors.
Published 6 months ago by Watts-in
5.0 out of 5 stars helped me. helped my kids. excellent
My children were 4 and 6 at the time. My 6 year old daughter could read this book and we could discuss "stuff" that was in her head, but didn't know how to say... Read more
Published on December 11, 2010 by T. Hessler
5.0 out of 5 stars the boys and girls book about divorce
I think this is the best book available for parents AND children, dealing with the horror of a broken family. My daughter (age 12) carried this book with her for many weeks. Read more
Published on July 24, 2010 by C. S.
1.0 out of 5 stars Terrible
This book was recommended reading (by a LPC) for my eight year old daughter. Written in 1970 this book actually encourages children to garnish a response and/or action from their... Read more
Published on September 8, 2009 by Brett Clauson
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent triage for the ravages of divorce
I respectfully disagree with the reviews from well-meaning adults regarding Gardner's candor. Divorce is not last place at the science fair. Read more
Published on December 5, 2008 by A Wuulf
5.0 out of 5 stars Very helpful!!!
After a couple of years of trying to figure out what was wrong with my step daughter who's now 11, we finally found out that her mom has been repeatedly telling her numerous... Read more
Published on September 2, 2008 by Sofpod
2.0 out of 5 stars Not The Best
I looked at this book on the recommendation of my counselor. I don't think I'll use it with my kids. Read more
Published on April 5, 2008 by K. Brandt
1.0 out of 5 stars the boys and girls book about divorce
This book is awful. It is hateful toward parents and I would never recommend that a child read it! It is ugly and negative and has no value for helping a child heal from divorce!
Published on September 23, 2007 by Bonnie L. Olander
1.0 out of 5 stars Cannot believe that this book is still available...
Yes, this book "tells it like it is"- but only for the WORST case scenarios. Since circumstances and situations are different in every divorce, harsh reality is not always... Read more
Published on May 31, 2006 by A Buny
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