Customer Reviews

From Boys to Men: Gay Men Write About Growing Up

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This for-the-most-part very fine collection of 21 essays by gay men writing about growing up (there are two or three selections I would have omitted) reminded me of how much alike we all are and that their experiences and mine, even though we are separated by a generation, are essentially pretty much the same: wanting to be accepted by others, both at home and at school, the crushes on male straight friends, the trauma of playing center field, the fear of taking communal showers, being labeled sensitive or different and the feelings of utter aloneness. There was not so much the name calling then ("fag" and "faggot"), however; our differentness was just not talked about. Or as Lily Tomlin says so aptly in one of her monologues, in the 60's nobody was gay; we were just shy.

The editors include writers, some of them established, many of them publishing for the first time, with fascinating backgrounds: one writer whose parents tell him they are both gay ("Sleeping Eros" by Michael McAllister), another whose twin is also gay ("Competitive Lives of Gay Twins" by Michael Gardner), and finally one writer whose family lived in a converted school bus ("Aplysia californica" by Jason Tougaw).

The best essays in alphabetical order by author are "No Matter What Happens" (David Bahr), "Dick" (Alexander Chee), "Terrence" (Joe Jervis), and "Mom-Voice" by Vestal McIntyre. Chee writes with humor of his obsession from the age of eight with the male body and sex organ, both McIntyre and Bahr's essays are extremely moving accounts of a gay child's relationship with his mother, as is "Terrence," for that matter. Many of us have had a Terrence in our lives. Mine was "Daevid with and E." He wore expensive women's long mink coats, diamond ear studs; and when I drove him to the hospital on what would be his final visit, he wore a black lace baseball cap to complete his ensemble. Reading "Terrence" reminded me of how much I miss Daevid's humor, wit, courage and, most of all, his honesty. That essay alone is worth the price of the book.

Finally a word about "Inheritance" by Lee Houck. I cannot be objective about this essay as I have known his parents for over thirty years and Lee his entire life as well as most of the other people he writes about. Like a parent who looks up his child first in his school yearbook, I of course read this essay first-- and again-- and then a third time. This extremely well-written essay about Lee's alcoholic grandfather who apparently figured out early on that his grandson was different blew me away.

FROM BOYS TO MEN is a valuable addition to the writings of the gay experience.

Thomas, David, Sean, Marc, Dexter, Johnny, Alex, Brian. I can remember their names and recite them like a roll call of saints and demons; the boys who, largely unbeknownst to them, drew me out of myself and let me to myself all at once in those years between the kindergarten-era dawning of my nascent queerdom to the high-noon of becoming a full fledged 'mo. Some teased, some taunted, and some were tender. But we never, ever touched.

I thought I'd nearly forgotten them, but they're still with me. This book, with its highly readable essays, brought them back to me. But more than that, with every essay it brought back to me parts of the the boy that I was, introduced him to the man became, and let us finally finally embrace each other. Back then he wanted to know that everything would be turn out alright, like the boys in this book. Now I can assure him that it did.

The the rare book that can take you back to a time that wasn't necessarily a happy one when you lived through it, and not only make you want to go there but also make you want to linger. This is one of those rare books.

This is a terrific book. Each story is different, but there is unity in how the men experienced childhood from a distinctively gay perspective.

Each and every story captivates you with it's little quirks that you may or may not be able to relate to. And even if you can't, you can almost feel it happen to yourself as you read through it.

An honest piece of work put together by many of today's great writers. Definitely a recommended read.

Having just finished a biography of Stan Musial, I thought I would next read a seminal bio of Ted Williams. So I searched for that and noticed this book inthe results. This is what I love about my kindle. Thinking I am going to read a baseball bio and stumbling instead upon this wonderful anthology of stories of gay men, not of their coming out, but of their recollections of what it means to be a man. Gender streching perhaps, but oddly just as valid as the reflections on the two baseball icons, Stan the Man and Teddy Ballgame, as I had sought. The editors have hit a fabulous home run here; focusing not just on with whom we sleep, but on what itmeans to be a man in today's diverse world. A fun but provocative read. I hope more straight gaseball fans find this book the same way I did.

The authors included in here will astound. Very well conceived and produced. Each story is just short enough to keep you reading until you've realized the book is over. Joe Jervis is extremly talented and just happens to be my friend for over 20yrs. I'm proud to know him. I hope he is grateful to his muse Terrence.