Customer Reviews

Boys Will be Boys: Breaking the Link Between Masculinity and Violence

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This book presents in a way that no one can argue with, the clear links between how we treat and train our boys and why they act out later with violence. Boys will be boys, we say, excusing the inexcusable... because it was taught to us by our parents too.

Break the chain! Break the chains that tie so many young men in prison for violent actions. Stop the cycle that says, "I couldn't help it. It's just natural to get angry, to hit, to ..." Save a boy from this curse.

Let him have a nurturing father (-figure), let him play with dolls and practice caring for others (as a future father of America), let him learn how to feel and talk. Don't lock him up!

Let him learn to be a real, caring man.

Boys Will Be Boys shatters the American assumption that masculinity and violence need exist hand in hand. This book describes masculine violence within the realms of military policy, criminal behavior, and boyhood. It details how boys are being raised violent and are not necessarily born with more violent tendencies than girls. This is a must read for anyone interested in gender studies or childcare.

I have just purchased and reread Myriam Miedzian's 2002 revised edition of this book, and wish to say that her new introduction is more timely than ever, and it has given me additional insights into the mindset of the men who got us into the war in Iraq. The section entitled "What About Our National Security?" is a great sequel to the original Chapter 2: ""Real Men", "Wimps" and Our National Security". Boys Will Be Boys points out that obsession with toughness, dominance and power, a lack of concern for human life, no interest in understanding how our adversaries think and how our actions affect theirs, all combined with the undue influence of economic interests, lead us into unnecessary and deadly wars.

The book goes way beyond the present political situation. The chapter entitled "Boys Will Be Boys" provides a balanced and well-researched discussion of how biology and environment interact to lead boys and men to commit most violent acts. I appreciated the fact that the author makes concrete suggestions for change to decrease the violence in boys and men with chapters on the importance of good fathering, on educational programs, and on the topic of violent entertainment and boys.

One doesn't have to agree with each and every recommendation Dr. Miedzian makes to appreciate the issues she raises and the information she brings forth. Her book is an extensive section of endnotes and bibliography, is clear and well-written and utterly fascinating.

Peggy Levison, Ph.D.

Myriam Miedzian
Boys Will Be Boys:
Breaking the Link Between Masculinity and Violence

(New York: Doubleday, 1991) 337 pages

A comprehensive attempt to understand and correct
the enculturation of boys to be: macho, tough, dominant,
callous toward women, eager to seek danger and to fight.
Boys are not naturally hard, violent, insensitive,
ruthless, militaristic, competitive, & power-hungry.
We train these personality characteristics into our boys
thru team sports and the glorification of war.
The absence of sensitive, empathetic fathers
--from the home and from the media--
leaves boys without such role-models.
Television super-heroes succeed thru violence.
Heroes who mediate rather than heroes who fight
would help our boys to grow into better men.

If you would like to discover other such books,
search the Internet for the following exact words:
"Best Books on Gender-Personality".

James Leonard Park, creator of the Gender-Pattern Chart.

Boys Will Be Boys: Breaking the Link Between Masculinity and Violence addresses our society's attitudes towards violence and males. It questions the acceptance of violence as a way of life. It addresses fatherhood and its effect on sons. Miedzian looks at school programs that work and frankly discusses the impact our media and commercial market have on our children. She lists countless examples, including words to songs our teens are listening to. Boys Will Be Boys is a profound work pursuing a priority issue.