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Breaking the Bonds of Adult Child Abuse: A Biblical Textbook on Abusive Narcissistic Families, How They Operate, and How to Deal with Them Paperback – March 29, 2011


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Breaking the Bonds of Adult Child Abuse: A Biblical Textbook on Abusive Narcissistic Families, How They Operate, and How to Deal with Them + Narcissistic Confrontations: A Biblical Guide to Your Abusive Family and Church Family's Battle Tactics, Covert Operations, and Nuclear Meltdowns
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 650 pages
  • Publisher: Outskirts Press (March 29, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1432766562
  • ISBN-13: 978-1432766566
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 1.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.9 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #744,970 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Award-winning author Sister Renee Pittelli is an Adult Child Recovery Mentor, victim's advocate, and the founder and director of Luke 17:3 Ministries for Adult Daughters of Abusive, Controlling, or Abandoning Birth-Families. She is the product of an abusive childhood and abusive family relationships that continued long into her adulthood. At the age of 47 the Lord set her free, when she was disowned by her abusive family for setting limits on their behavior.
Since then, God has blessed Sister Renee with healing and peace, and has led her to help others by sharing her testimony and experiences. She has written extensively about family abusers, narcissists, sociopaths, and their Silent Partners, the dilemmas unique to abusive family systems, the Biblical perspective on abuse, setting and enforcing boundaries, godly confrontation, the myth of forgiveness without repentance, honoring abusive parents, cutting ties with reprobate relatives, maintaining No Contact, and living the life of freedom, peace, and joy that our heavenly Father intended for us.

***Listen to my interview with Stacy Lynn Harp at Active Christian Media about my book Narcissistic Predicaments- This time we cover topics like restitution, abuser's funerals, setting limits, circular arguments, "personality disorders", N's abandonment issues, etc. Many thanks to Stacy Lynn and ACM. Click here for the podomatic link. Enjoy and share please :)

http://stacyharp.podomatic.com/entry/2011-06-07T16_27_34-07_00


***Check out my interview with Stacy Lynn Harp of Active Christian Media. We talk about narcissistic families, forgiveness without repentance, my book Breaking the Bonds of Adult Child Abuse including excerpts, and much more. Many thanks to Stacy Lynn Harp and Active Christian Media, and praise the Lord!:

http://stacyharp.podomatic.com/entry/2011-05-10T12_30_50-07_00




Customer Reviews

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All I can say is "WOW" what a great read (via their website)!
Kimichanga
When looking for answers for narcissistic/antisocial personality disordered people or loved ones, this book hits the spot .
Daphne Lomax
It has changed my life so much, it's a book you will want to refer too time and time again.
Jenny

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

28 of 29 people found the following review helpful By Stephanie Rollins on April 27, 2011
Format: Paperback
This book could not have been delivered at a better time. My mother has histrionic personality disorder, and my father is her enabler. For as long as I can remember, I suffered from her emotional neglect and abuse. She is a master manipulator. During my growing-up years, I simply wanted to die. How can a mother be so cruel? How can a father just sit back and watch it?

I am now 35. I broke all ties with them several years ago. I still hurt. They make sure of it. Yesterday was my birthday, and they had to stir up trouble. I turned to this book.

I have stayed out of therapy, because I did not think anyone would understand the outlandish things my mother does. Sister Renee Pittelli gets it. From an academic stand point, and from her experience, she understands narcissistic families. This is the book I have searched for for years.
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26 of 28 people found the following review helpful By Miranda on June 13, 2011
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This is the third book Renee Pittelli has written, and I've purchased and read them all. All her books have helped me in coming to terms with my abusive family history.

This book is replete with insight into the painful situations common to abusive families, with the focus (for a change) being on how to support the victims, not on how to try to "understand" or "excuse" the perpetrators. Sister Pittelli provides extensive scriptural evidence of what God really requires of both parents and children in families- and it is not what our self-serving abusers told us it was! Our abusers may have demanded we "honor our father and our mother" (which conveniently may have been the only part of the bible they could quote!), but Sister Pittelli makes it clear, with biblical backup, that God never told us to honor evildoers, but rather to rebuke them and expose evil. Sister Pittelli distinguishes between those who are true Christians and those who display "psuedo-religious" behaviors while claiming to be Christian. We can indeed know people by their fruits- and a true Christian is not someone who repeatedly abuses people. This can be an area of great confusion for abused children, as their abusers often went to church and proclaimed themselves as Christians- all the while continuing to abuse us. Sister Pittelli points out that this is just more confusion created by the devil- originator of all confusion.

Sister Pittelli also points out that psychiatry/psychology has a terrible track record when it comes to curing sociopathy, narcissism and borderline personality, all of which can be characteristics of our abusers.
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18 of 20 people found the following review helpful By Bookreader on August 16, 2011
Format: Paperback
Breaking the Bonds of Adult Child Abuse is a book packed with so much information on this subject that I personally know people who always keep it within arm's reach (and even in their car!) so they can refer back to it when certain family situations might arise. It is chock full of information and Bible verses that will absolutely help you get through the daily challenges of life with narcissists, deciding what to do about your family narcissists, and recovery from them after a lifetime of abuse. After reading through it I said "Wow, that's me!" quite a few times, and I feel like I now know how to deal with the situations I have been struggling with my whole life. This book is a must read, I cannot wait to see what Sister Renee has in store for us next. Thank you Sister Renee for passing down your wealth of knowledge and experience to us.
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16 of 19 people found the following review helpful By Not My Real Name on October 22, 2011
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is about 300 pages too long; nonetheless, those other 200 are worth the price. Sister Pittelli writes in an autobiographical and reflective style. I'm not saying that her experiences were boring or colorless. They were entertaining, but they began to vex me with their unreasonable length. It's a great reference manual if you want to go through the Table of Contents, though.

The book's style: Pittelli reminisces on her personal experiences (which were severely abusive), as though we are reading her diary, and subsequently deduces conclusions. Her experiences aren't as anomalous as those of the author of the book "IT", which makes the book translatable to a more diverse audience. Her abuse, also, wasn't primarily physical, which was useful, as well, focusing more on the emotional and verbal qualities, which are more common in American bourgeoisie than physical brutality.

Her reliance on Scripture was especially rewarding, but while she does try to lay out a comprehensive theodicy, she does not completely succeed. The chapter on Forgiveness reflected hermeneutical wisdom one doesn't usually see in emotionally stunted clergy these days. Also, she lists 102 reasons to avoid a person, which were VERY helpful.

The problem with narcissists is they turn their victims against their own subconscious, which causes them to ignore the abuse and the pain for any number of ridiculous reasons. Jesus says we shall know 'them' by their fruit. Narcissists try to get us to sympathize with reasons for their poison. Those who struggle with codependency - much like addicts of substances besides people - lack adequate functionality of their frontal cortex, the analytic and creative areas of the brain, in order to disengage themselves from the abuser.
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