Customer Reviews

Breaking Free: Understanding Sexual Addiction & the Healing Power of Jesus

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Russell Willingham's Breaking Free is a compelling and insightful work that seems intended primarily for Christian heterosexual males seeking deliverance from the habitual use of pornographic materials, sexual fantasizing, masturbation, prostitution and extra-marital affairs.

He is careful to distinguish between those that struggle sexually and those who suffer from sexual addictions but provides hope and practical advice for both.

Willingham theorizes that a common thread running through the lives of the sexually addicted is that they are lonely to the core and have frequently experienced abandonment. He emphasizes that they often have personal histories characterized by physical, sexual or emotional abuse in childhood and suggests these experiences result in unmet yearnings for love, acceptance and security.

Because of the lack of adequate nurturing in the formative years, the sexually addicted are subjected to powerful and often relentless temptations as they attempt to satisfy the underlying for love and nurture. Motivated by inner emptiness, they are frequently driven by an overwhelming need to feel valuable and worthwhile. Willingham believes that these unmet childhood needs, though valid, are mistakenly thought to be sexual needs and lead to addictive and sexually obsessive behaviour.

Breaking Free also attempts to identify the demonic undercurrents of sexual addiction and portrays sexually compulsive behaviour as an idolatrous attempt to meet ones personal needs apart from God. This is undertaken as the sexually addicted take their deep hunger for love to a "sexualized goddess" in an act of worship.

For those suffering under the yoke of sexual addiction, Willingham holds out a promise of hope and deliverance. He stresses though, that this can only be accomplished through consistency in prayer, full cooperation with God's Word, and the establishment of authentic relationships to provide support and accountability within the Body of Christ.

He then outlines the process of breaking free from sexual addiction through an intimacy with Christ that invites him into the pain and allows him to meet the needs for love, acceptance and nurture.

Breaking Free is written in a down to earth and readable style and is a good place to start for Christians who struggle with sexual addictions or for those who provide counsel and support to them.

The author speaks with rare authority and insight into the complex issues related to sexual addiction. This is a balanced approach, in that Willingham affirms both the effects of one's family of origin and the responsibility of the addict to make mature choices. He writes with compassion, yet with a force that motivates the addict toward healthy life and relationships. Willingham writes from a Christian perspective, pointing the reader to the healing power of Jesus Christ. Non-Christian addicts may or may not wish to acknowledge the power in the Gospel, but I believe even they will be greatly helped by this remarkable book. A must read for anyone struggling with sexual addiction in any form.

Never before have I understood why, after all these years, I have had this overwhelming craving for pornography. Having been a happily married man for 20 years never seemed to matter. Now, because Russell Willingham has taken the time, and God love him for it, I finally have an answer. Being a sex addict has nothing to do with sex. It has to do with lack of nurturing and the constant need to be loved and accepted. Turning to superficial sexual gratification is nothing more than trying to find a way to fill the vacuum in our hearts. Russell then helps you to understand that even though we finally come to an understanding of the cause, we must then take responsibility for our actions. And, the way to overcome the addiction is to ask Jesus to fill the yearning we have for love and acceptance. He is the only one who loves us for who we are; who accepts us for who we are; never faultering; never withdrawing. Thank you Russell Willingham for writing this book. I will keep it by my side forever.

Without reiterating what the other reviewers have said, this book was just so helpful to me in understanding my cybersex addition and finding comfort in the love of God to heal my wounds and bring me peace. My sister sent me the book right after I was fired for watching porn on the internet at work (worst day of my life). I have always considered myself a Christian, though was always at war with myself because of my "secret" side (and I'm no "bible thumper"). Besides seeing God's work in my being fired, this book brought me so much freedom and joy through knowing that there was a way out and God had/would forgive me if I continued to repent for my past. I've "fallen off the wagon" several times in the past year, and I'm about to read this book again to get me back on the right track. If you're addicted, or think you might be, and want to find a Christ-centered way out, don't even hesitate - BUY THIS BOOK and READ IT.

Willingham puts to words, facts which, if you're honest with yourself, you'll not be able to deny. He backs it up solidly, with Scripture verses, that things we thought in our past were okay in which to dabble, are actually strong and very powerful temptations against the flesh, with which we are not capable of dealing, alone, in our own power.

He brings into focus many questions I had about my past, and how it has affected me over the years. There were many compelling revelations in this book which were so very accurate, it was hard for me to put the book down.

I strongly recommend it for anyone who is ready to face and fight the mighty forces of sexual addiction to win! But, you'd better be ready to fight.

Countless Men struggle in sexual sin...And those who do not...Well, do you? "Breaking Free" explores several aspects in finding the core roots to where 'our' addiction comes from. It has helped me in immense ways in recovering my own addiction. The author goes beyond just 'practical' ways we can hope to recover, in which some can relate to, ie. more praying, more...holy stuff. Also, the author uses several examples, in which more than one time you will find yourself saying "That's me!" Furthermore, he affirms that not just 'praying, and reading more books, and scripture' are going to heal us. But it will require a true relationship between 'us' and God, in which God will work through others as well, to attain genuine recovery. Also admitting that the book itself is not the true way. It's a great read. I recommend reading it, then passing it on to a good friend.

If you've ever struggled with sexual addiction or porn addiction, this book is a MUST. I've read other books that go into detail about the relational and spiritual consequences of this addiction: how it destroys marriages and families, grieves the Holy Spirit, etc. But unless you really know what you're dealing with, you can have full realization of all these consequences and still be defeated in your struggle every time. This is the first book I've seen that talks about the root of sexual addiction, and how to let Jesus get in and rip it out. Awesome.

I'm a homosexual sex addict who also loves and desires to live my life for Jesus... In the last two years, I've come out and asked for help from my friends and family, and it's been a hard but very good journey. While this book does not specifically address homosexuality (try anything by Andy Comiskey - amazing stuff), it is the best book I've read on the subject of sexual addiction. I recommend it to anyone who struggles with sexual or relational brokenness of any kind.

One of the best books on sexual addiction. It gets to the root of why a sex addict does what he does. It is written from a true Christian perspective and is a great way for the church to introduce sexual recovery to the body.

Since many churches do not believe that sexual addiction is a true addiction, i.e. just another sin or bad habit, having a Christian author point out this falicy is very helpful. Many Chrsitians will not read secular authors like Patrick Carnes so this book will help a huge demographic that is currently living in total denial.

A good book to hand that brother in church who likes to give the sisters "hugs" every Sunday morning. Or one to give to your husband who has a problem with internet porn.

As for the only negative feedback I saw on here.... Sexual addictions can very much destroy homes, families, jobs, and ones self.

Thus the reason for the book, and the reason why so many people are buying such books now

This book I think is so fantastic because it attacks things both on a spiritual (or moral) front, and on an emotional front.

The spiritual front being, why it is wrong, and how to combat it.

The emotional front being ones past. Their child hood, things that hurt them.....and for some Im sure you will learn things that hurt you that you didnt even know hurt you....things you may have thought were petit.