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Broken Open: How Difficult Times Can Help Us Grow [Paperback]

Elizabeth Lesser
4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (123 customer reviews)

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Phoenix Rising
Read a Q&A with Elizabeth Lesser on the process of overcoming loss and emerging with new optimism [PDF].

Book Description

June 14, 2005
In the more than twenty-five years since she co-founded Omega Institute - now the world's largest center for spiritual retreat and personal growth -Elizabeth Lesser has been an intimate witness to the ways in which people weather change and transition. In a beautifully crafted blend of moving stories, humorous insights, practical guidance, and personal memoir, she offers tools to help us make the choice we all face in times of challenge: Will we be broken down and defeated, or broken open and transformed? Lesser shares tales of ordinary people who have risen from the ashes of illness, divorce, loss of a job or a loved one - stronger, wiser, and more in touch with their purpose and passion. And she draws on the world's great spiritual and psychological traditions to support us as we too learn to break open and blossom into who we were meant to be.

Frequently Bought Together

Broken Open: How Difficult Times Can Help Us Grow + The Seeker's Guide (previously published as The New American Spirituality) + The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
Price for all three: $34.32

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Cofounder of the upstate New York Omega Institute and author of The Seeker’s Guide, Lesser uses her own life story, and those of others, to explore what she calls the "Phoenix Process," or positive life change that can emerge from very difficult life events. In short, episodic chapters, Lesser cites stories of those who have gone through a divorce (as she has), lost a child or suffered a terminal illness. She brings in thinkers such as Tibetan Buddhist Pema Chodron, the late philosopher Joseph Campbell and her longtime friend and colleague Ram Dass to illustrate how meditation and belief in a spirit that works through people can help break through fear and hopelessness. Lesser’s own Phoenix Process began when, having previously been "betrayed" by her husband, she embarked on an adulterous affair (with a "shaman lover") that lasted a year and, in her terms, broke her open and allowed her to change. Lesser doesn’t describe her life events in enough detail for them to stand on their own as memoir; rather, she puts them in the service of an explicitly Nietzschean argument: that one needs to embrace one’s own "evil" in order to grow. Lesser’s resolve comes through in her clear, even, declarative prose, and her use of jargon is sparing and directed. But with conventional morality off the table and frequently overgeneralized musings sprinkled in ("Women still nurture and sustain me, but it is men who call me to grow, to examine my presumptions, to widen the boundaries of my heart"), the book can feel less the delineation of a process than a careful set of self-justifications. That sense is mitigated, however, by the anecdotes of other Phoenix veterans, via Omega and other parts of Lesser’s life.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Review

"A most extraordinary book...Lesser is a brilliantly gifted writer."
—Caroline Myss, author of Sacred Contracts and Anatomy of the Spirit

"Elizabeth Lesser bravely and beautifully explores one of the most compelling questions of life: How do we emerge from suffering and challenge with real, encompassing wisdom and love? Broken Open is personal, pragmatic, and enlightening."
—Sharon Salzberg, author of Faith: Trusting Your Own Deepest Experience

"Rich in food for philosophical mastication, and sparkling in their stylistic clarity, the true-life stories in Broken Open are both entertaining and enlightening."
—Tom Robbins, author of Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, Still Life with Woodpecker, and Villa Incognito

"Insightful reflections...Reminiscent of Rachel Naomi Remen's books (e.g. Kitchen Table Wisdom), the book is gentle in tone without falling into sentimentality an clear without being dogmatic or simplistic."
—Library Journal

"Never again will a painful experience break me down. Instead, I'll use Elizabeth's book to help me bread open into greater strength, acceptance, and awakening."
—Jane Fonda, actress, activist, and author of My Life So Far



Product Details

  • Paperback: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Villard; Reprint edition (June 14, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0375759913
  • ISBN-13: 978-0375759918
  • Product Dimensions: 5.1 x 0.7 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (123 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,359 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Elizabeth Lesser is the cofounder and senior adviser of Omega Institute (Rhinebeck, New York), recognized internationally for its workshops and professional training in holistic health, psychology, and cross-cultural arts and religion. Since 1977, when Omega was founded, she has helped direct the institute's organization, research and develop its programs, and train its staff. She has also been privileged to study and teach with leading thinkers and practitioners in the fields of human development and spiritual growth. Prior to her work at Omega, she was a midwife and childbirth educator. She attended Barnard College and San Francisco State University. She lives in the Hudson River Valley with her family.

Customer Reviews

I recommend this book to anyone who has had a " life change". SueM  |  29 reviewers made a similar statement
This book tops any other self-help/motivational book I have ever read. Pierre A. Rudder  |  18 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
137 of 138 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Great Read May 26, 2004
Format:Hardcover
Don't let the Publisher's Weekly review stop you from buying this wonderful book. The idea is not that we MUST embrace our evils in order to grow, but that we can use our times of depression,anxiety, or pain to transform us into more open people. I spotted it in Barnes and Noble the other day, bought it, and haven't been able to put it down since. Lesser calls this process of transformation "The Phoenix Process." She beautifully illustrates how difficult times really can help us grow by giving us the story of her first marriage and how the pain she endured during it made her better afterward. She also includes stories of others who have gone through their own struggles in life. Broken Open is well written, and interesting from the first page to the last. The stories in it are truly amazing and inspirational. I reccomend this book to everyone!
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78 of 79 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Life's little survival manual December 17, 2004
Format:Hardcover
When I had to place my partner of eighteen years in assisted- living this summer,I felt such sorrow, guilt and despair that I barely functioned in my professional job. I would cry for hours, letting the phone ring when I couldn't compose myself enough to speak. At only 56, my partner had a massive stroke, followed by two more. By January of this year, she was showing all the signs of dementia. When I knew she could not live with me any more, I was heart-broken and tortured by guilt. A friend invitated me to visit her, and I noticed the title of a book laying on my friend's bedside table,"Broken Open". That really described me.
I began to read it, and I spent much of my visit finishing it!
Suddenly I knew I would eventually move through all this awfulness and out the other side.
Lesser's image of the Phoenix rising from the ashes resonated with me, for ashes was an apt metaphor for my life then.
So I began to follow the path Lesser lays out for the reader. She combines the use of emotional and spiritual growth tools that can lead toward healing and growth.
I was not able to feel the Phoenix in me when I opened these pages the first time. But after many readings of this gentle and sometimes humorous book, I'm on my way to owning such strength. I read many of the other books Lesser recommends to the reader. I also prayed, meditated, and kept going to therapy. But this book started the whole miraculous passage toward recovery.
Elizabeth Lesser, with her poetic and supportive writing, held my hand, week after week. Her words created a virtual hologram that held me when I cried, and patted me softly as I raged.
Lesser's loving mission for this book must have been to help the reader see how she is feeling normal fear and pain that comes with crisis. Lesser acknowledges the unbearable and out-of-control nature of the crisis and loss experience. She helps the reader grow in confidence that she will come through it all, alive and sane... like almost all of us do.
I just read her book 3 months ago, and have also now read her book "A Seeker's Guide", another excellent, beautifully- written guide to spiritual growth.
So I haven't yet risen from the ashes of my burnt-out self. But Lesser's book has given me the courage to keep on facing reality, being present with my feelings, and meditating as if my life depended on it. Thanks, Elizabeth.
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74 of 76 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I have treasured this book December 25, 2005
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
It is one thing to espouse spiritual or philisophical teachings. It is another thing to offer a humanistic understanding of what it means to seek, grow, evolve and endure until we can each transform. I found myself lulled with the voice of the writer and my head kept nodding because I understood the journey. I find that empathetic witnessing is a great teacher for me, so hearing the story of others creates a wider canvas for me to see things on. I highly recommend this book to anyone who has the gift for introspection and perspective. If you are looking for a "how to be a better person" manual, you're not going to find that in any book. If your life is your onw manual on how to strive to change, grow and break open... this book with sooth, uplift and inspire you.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Broken Open is poignant and exhilarating
A very balanced presentation that includes personal and anecdotal information as well as scholarly, pointed references.
The book was both moving and motivating.
Published 9 days ago by joyce graber
1.0 out of 5 stars Just not my type of read
For anyone that likes this self reflection style of book it would be a great help, I am sure. Just not my beliefs.
Published 1 month ago by Terry McLamb
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book!
This book is great. It helped me understand where I am in my life and actually gave it a name "Phoenix Process". Read more
Published 1 month ago by Jennifer M. Karlis
4.0 out of 5 stars Encouraging..
This book gave me a lot of energy to take a step again towards the unknown direction where only I'll be closer to the god or the truth.. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Sarah
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautifully written
This will be a book that stays on my shelf for ongoing reference and wisdom. A good reminder that we are not alone--no matter what we are going through.
Published 1 month ago by Christine
4.0 out of 5 stars some great pages that I bookmarked
An interesting look at how you can be in a crisis or grief and actually turn it into an awakening or growth in your life. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Patricia A. Radenbaugh
3.0 out of 5 stars Good
I found the information presented from *that* number of perspectives to be interesting and entertaining. . . . . .
Published 1 month ago by Chris M
5.0 out of 5 stars Inspiring guide post to get you through any difficult time in your...
It's amazing how when you're open to change things start appearing- like this book- LOVED IT! Elizabeth Lesser is not only an inspiring, real, and terrific story-teller- she also... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Shannon M. Mccaffery
1.0 out of 5 stars Narcicist
A friend gifted me this book and I was excited to read it because the Omega Institute is within driving distance from my home and I'd always wanted to go. Read more
Published 1 month ago by amy
5.0 out of 5 stars Dense, well written, quotable.
Great book for anyone working through difficult times. Particularly, how to see what's on the other side of life's failures, punching through the pain. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Marty in Seattle
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