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But He'll Change: End the Thinking That Keeps You in an Abusive Relationship Paperback – February 1, 2010
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More About the Author
You can hear my interview on The Kathleen Show by going to: http://www.thekathleenshow.com/2010/05/09/joanna-v-hunter/
My abusive relationship lasted for almost 20 years. During that time my abuser used tactics to isolate me, instill fear, and hook my emotions to keep me in the relationship. I left that relationship, feeling that I didn't know who I was or what I liked and needed. I didn't know what healthy thinking was. There were no books that addressed what I wanted to know. So, I wrote one.
Whether you leave or stay in your relationship, But He'll Change can help you recognize the truth amid the chaos your partner creates to keep you hyper-vigilant and focused on him. Then you can make the best decision for yourself and, if applicable, your children. You can heal after abuse and move on to the life you've always wanted.
Since 2001, through my area shelter, I have been a speaker on domestic violence (DV) in communities and schools, and trained medical personnel how to screen patients for DV and help victims.
Contact me on Facebook: Joanna V Hunter
Follow my tweets: @hunterjv
Visit my blog: www.peoplewhodeservehappiness.blogspot.com
Top Customer Reviews
Since Amazon is so wonderful that it lets you flip through the book online see some of the excuses that women use, the correct beliefs that Hunter offers, and the exercises and reflection questions that she poses at the end of each mini chapter that women could work on in order to start correcting their thinking.
The good of the world DOES begin with the good of the individual. And while YOU may not be in an abusive relationship now or will never be one, you are very likely to know someone who is. Currently, statistics say that 52% of women in the US will experience physical or sexual violence in their lives. So while that is not ALL women it is more than half, and if you have sisters, girlfriends, cousins, aunts, grandmothers, mothers, godmothers, and friends you are very likely to know one that has been or might experience such abuse.
This book is a great resource for the others who are watching a woman going through this situation.Read more ›
It's even more full of the truth. The real truth. The truth we need to hear. The truth you've been blamed, yelled, forced, humiliated, (etc.) to deny to your own self. It is common sense. It is the truth that will set you free.
The book says that 37% of US women live in emotionally abusive relationships. The book is full of "issues to explore." It gives you excellent questions to ponder and journal about to help your healing, maybe gain some insights too. The truths are wonderful affirmations to glance back over. He took a long time brainwashing you and probably did a pretty good job! Some of his reality just became engrained in you and you'll need to keep reminding yourself most of what he said was lies. These truths and issues are worth looking over and remembering as you work so hard to heal, to reclaim your self -- your true self.
Glad it's in my library. I review the truths as a reality check. Just to make sure I'm not slipping backwards into his warped reality.
This books is written by someone who experienced spousal abuse; who had children to consider, who struggled with religion issues. She's a very "real" woman. Plus there's a nice flow to her writing.. one doesn't get overwhelmed and it's easy to read, put down and revisit.
I am a "licensed batterer treatment provider" and have read widely in this genre... thank you so much for the book, the blog, your website and the interviews in the back of the book... exceptional interviews with professionals in the field of domestic violence
What a great tool for someone still trying to make sense of it all. Give this book as a gift to someone in an abusive relationship. It would be extremely helpful to them.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Love her books. The Verbally Abusive Relationsip is her best book out there. This is a follow up. Worth looking through just to validate. Ties it all together.Published 4 months ago by deelighting
These are words every woman (and even some men) need to read and heed. Coming from a home filled with constant abuse and turmoil, it would have been wonderful if my mother had... Read morePublished 9 months ago by Carol
A wonderful book to help someone through a domestic violence situation. The person I bought it for found it very resourceful and healing.Published 11 months ago by L. Syring
This book does go into why some women believe that the abuse is their fault and how men amnipulate them into believing that they are changing their ways when they really aren't. Read morePublished 19 months ago by Kevin
'But He'll Change' communicates that the change must begin in the victim: the abused becomes the rescuer. Read morePublished 19 months ago by Eleanor Cowan