Customer Reviews

Butterfly Tattoo

5 star:		(22)
4 star:		(7)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

Deidre Knight's Butterfly Tattoo is unlike anything you've ever read. It defies easy categorization the same way it defies all expectation about what constitutes a normal family, a loving relationship, and a happy ending. One of the most satisfying books I've ever read, the characters have stuck with me long after I finished and I'm convinced I'll still be thinking of them for years to come. It's a novel about living through tragedy and overcoming grief, the bravery required to take a chance on someone new, and the untold joy of finding love where you least expect it.

I'd recommend this book to anyone who enjoys nuanced, highly emotional stories and complex, multi-layered characters. It's a definite keeper!

Butterfly Tattoo is a beautiful story about two deeply scarred people who manage to overcome their fears and take a chance on love. Rebecca, a former actress, was scarred both physically and emotionally in an attack by a crazed fan and now struggles to move past the attack and create a new life for herself. Michael was devastated when the love of his life was killed by a drunk driver and struggles to rebuild his life and to reconnect with his 8 YO daughter who was also wounded in the accident and who bears physical and emotional scars of her own. They are scared to move forward, yet they are deeply attracted to each other and start a relationship that has the potential to heal them both if only they can move past their fears.

Deidre Knight does a great job of drawing the reader into both characters' lives and thoughts by alternating between Rebecca's and Michael's POV throughout the book. You feel the pain, the yearning, and the emotional growth of both characters. Rebecca and Michael are both deeply sympathetic characters and there are no villains, manufactured conflict, or "big misunderstandings" in this book. It's just a story about not being afraid to follow your heart and about the fact that true love is a beautiful thing that enriches our lives, no matter what form it comes in.

One note - potential readers should know that Michael is bisexual. I thought this was a fascinating and somewhat unique sideline in a book classified as a romance that was tastefully and realistically handled and added great depth to the story.

Several years ago Rebecca O'Neill, an actress on a popular television program, survived a brutal attack by a deranged fan. Despite numerous plastic surgeries, Rebecca is still physically scarred and in a place like Hollywood, looks are everything. Now, she's a behind-the-scenes executive in a studio, searching for that next great script. Unfortunately, her self-esteem took just as bad a blow as her body. Her parents moved across the country to nurse her back to health, but despite their nurturing and survivors' therapy, Rebecca can't overcome the post-traumatic stress caused by the attack. It didn't help that less than two weeks after the incident and before the bandages even came off, her long time boyfriend and fellow actor, Jake, dumped her. Rebecca's trained and re-shaped her body, but a muscular physique won't camouflage the scars. Nor will it heal the asthma, panic attacks, or weakness left in her hand.

Enter Michael Warner. Electrician, widower, and father, Michael can't seem to get past his partner's loss and move on. His family's life irrevocably changed the day a drunk driver killed Alex and physically and emotionally scarred their daughter, Andrea. Despite therapy, Andrea's failed to open up to anyone and most days, Michael can barely motivate himself, let alone her. Accompanying her father at the studio one day, Andrea runs into Rebecca. Intrigued by the woman's scars, she begins to open up.

Encouraged, Michael drags Rebecca into his life. He tells himself it's for his daughter's sake, but deep down, he's attracted to the complex woman. The problem? Michael's life partner was a man. Torn between what he desires and what he thinks he should desire, he needs to come to grips with what he wants and what others think is best for him.

I don't even know how to begin to thoroughly explain Butterfly Tattoo. Normally I read stories whose characters are driven more by external conflict than internal conflict. Not so with this novel (and believe me, you're getting your money's worth page-count wise here). Intelligent heroine who has survived despite insurmountable odds? Check. Brooding, complicated hero? Check. Fully fleshed out secondary characters? Yep. Sufficient internal conflict? Whoa, yeah!

I'm not sure this is the type of book I could re-read again and again. Ms. Knight takes her reader, as well as her characters, on a winding emotional path full of potholes and switchbacks that'd put an Irish backcountry road to shame. She has to, in order to convince us that a man who partnered with another man for thirteen years could turn around and fall in love with a woman. She rummages around in her characters' heads, dragging everything but the kitchen sink out of their mental closets. Estranged family members, overprotective parents, first loves, insecurities, failures: it's all there. Vivid imagery and twists of words will remain long after you finish the novel. Things like, "When you work with writers for a living like I do, life's little details are an herb garden, and you pluck a few ripe things here and there to give away."

This story is more like an English cottage garden. All the diverse colors and shapes and wild unkemptness is tied together by a single unifying path: love. All I can say is go out and buy this book.


Chris
Reviewed for Joyfully Reviewed

This book gets one star for Ms Knight's attempt to explore a new area in the genre - unfortunately, she loses four stars for execution. It is not that the writing is less than adequate. Her putting together of words is fine, so fine in fact, that I am tempted to go through her back list. The problem with this particular book is that I never, ever, even once believe in her characters.

The hero, Michael, is straight until he kisses a gay man. He then becomes gay himself without so much as a blink, apparently. No self doubts, no real questions, I don't even get a sense of his being particularly surprised. His lover tells him to open his heart and let love lead him, and there you go, that's all it takes. We, the readers, are supposed to believe that this man had no clue that he was bisexual until the moment of the kiss. That seems extremely unlikely to me. This guy lived his whole life and never noticed that he was attracted to other men?

The heroine, Rebecca, who has her own issues, doesn't seem to have any problem falling for a man who at one point describes himself as another man's "wife". Surely, a woman who has survived the kind of physical and emotional trauma this character has would have an amped up sense of self preservation. We all know that gay men are attracted to, and fall in love with other gay men yet Rebecca has no qualms about throwing her heart into a relationship with a man who describes another man as the love of his life. I don't think so.

The third leg of the triangle is Michael's dead partner Alex. Alex is Mother Theresa, Yoda, and Brad Pitt all rolled into one. Patient, loving, giving, hell - he cures children of cancer!! Yes, really. He is, among other shining virtues, a Pediatric Oncologist. The man couldn't be more perfect....or less believable. Real men, yes even gay men, snore, and scratch, and leave their underwear on the floor. They forget your birthday sometimes, and say exactly the wrong thing. Gay men are gay, but they are no less human than anyone else. Unlike Saint Alex.

Then there is the child the two men share, an eight year old who walks, talks, and thinks like a teenager - with a barbie backpack. No. Sorry, no. Not even close. The gap between what an eight year old thinks and does, and what a teenager thinks and does is as wide as the Grand Canyon. No.

A story without believable characters is impossible to get involved in. You can't be afraid for them, or mourn with them, or rejoice with them. You just can't care. One day someone will write about a bisexual man that falls in love with a woman, and all the grief and the glory that entails. This isn't that book. Pass.

I try to always end my review with a recommendation of a similar book, if I can't recommend the one I'm reviewing, but I haven't read a similar book. This book really is the first of it's kind. I wish it was better.

Spoilers..
There is no doubt that there is a love story in this book but it wasn't with the h and the H, rather this story revolved more around a the H and his former partner who died a year ago. That love story completely overshadowed the H and h and because of this the story takes on a darker tone than what, IMO, a romance novel has. I have read other books where the H is struggling with the memory of a lover and at a certain turning point they are able to heal and fall in love with someone else. This story failed to ever really give the reader a sense of finality with the H's grieving which might have been the authors intent but that to me does not qualify as romance. What made it even more depressing for me was that the h also had gone through some very traumatizing events in her own life which created insecurities that were reinforced by the H constant selfishness. The H clearly used her. He used her not to be alone, to get past his grief, to get a reaction from the family, to reach his daughter and to me that is just selfish. Later when the h finally has had enough, the H then uses his daughter to try to get the h back. Even then the H came up short with me, making the issue for the h leaving her own insecurities rather than the fact that he constantly treated her like she was simply not good enough. His manipulations completely eclipse his ability to be able to see past the h scars, I was not impressed by him. At the end of story I really did believe that the H loved the h but not that he was IN LOVE with her. Had he a choice between his dead partner and the h, he would drop her in a minute. He has put his dead lover in such a high pedestal that no human could possibly compare. To me love is not about making the best out of your circumstances but about having a relationship that fills you in a manner where you would not ever long to for anyone else, this was not the case for the H. The h played secondary to so many things: the ghost of his idol dead partner, his daughter, his guilt over the relationship, etc. It was all too much. The h deserved to be with someone that loved her and was not always longing for the unattainable OM or constantly comparing her.

This book was just too depressing for me, the romance element was abridged to such a degree that I just did not enjoy the book. The ending did not feel like a HEA. As a romance, this book was a disappointment.

Wow did I love this book. Completely off the regular beaten path the Butterfly Tattoo demonstrates that love in its real form can come in any package.

Rebecca is a scarred (both internally and externally) former actress who is trying to put her life back together after a brutal attack from a fan almost killed her. Michael a very recent "widower" is also trying to pick up the pieces after his partner dies and leaves him to raise their young daughter by himself. The unconventional love in this book at first had me a bit leary. Michael is gay. He had been with women before his long-time partner Alex and him fell in love but Alex was his soul mate, his one true love. In Michael's mind no one, especially not a woman would ever replace Alex. But then Michael meets Rebecca and he realizes his sexuality is not determined by his lover's gender but by the person they are inside and he is in absolute love with Rebecca.

This book tore me up. It was about a couple in love trying to get past not only Michael's having been in love with a man for years also his grief for his dead lover, and his guilt for having fallen in love again. If I could give this book 10 stars I would. I loved the characters, the story itself was amazing and perfectly delivered right up through the ending. I could not put this book down and read it in one sitting through the weee hours of the night.

I actually got this book from the library not wanting to drop the high trade paperback prices. After reading it though I bought it. The Butterfly Tattoo is a definate re-read over and over for me. I will be keeping my eye open for more from this author.

Butterfly Tattoo is a major departure from Knight's Parallel and Gods of Midnight paranormal romance series, and a departure the genres I normally read as well. Though the story is billed as a contemporary romance and it does has romantic elements, the story is not just about two people falling in love and finding an easy happily ever after. The story is just as is much about how three people, two with physical scars, and all with soul deep grief for losses than occurred on 'average' days which had such far reaching personal repercussions for all those involved find a way to become whole again.

This is not the book for everyone - those who find the idea of a long term committed same sex pairing uncomfortable may be put off by leading man Michael's grief over the tragic death of his life partner, Alex, and memories (handled very discretely) of kisses and touches between the two.

I really loved this story, it was emotionally complex and heart wrenching at times to watch Michael and his nine year old daughter Andrea deal with the fallout of their loss - Alex's death left a gigantic whole in their hearts and has nearly broken the remnants of their family. Michael who is unable to deal with his own grief struggles to help Andrea with her loss while feeling like he's lost his daughter in addition to his partner.

Inadvertently bringing light to the darkness that has enveloped Michael and Andrea's lives for the past year is Rebecca, who ironically meets both Michael and Andrea during a power black out at work. There is an immediate attraction between Michael and Rebecca, which causes confusion for Rebecca when she later discovers Michael is `gay' and guilt for Michael who feels as if his heart is betraying his dead partner. Andrea and Rebecca also find themselves to be kindred spirits in that they both carry physical scars in addition to the psychological ones, Rebecca from a stalker attack which nearly took her life and Andrea from the accident that killed her other dad.

There is so much going on in this story, and Michael's apparent switch from 'batting for the guys team' which has everyone questioning whether it is real or a temporary reaction to his loss, adds a whole other dimension to what may potentially be a rebound relationship. Also in addition to Michael, Rebecca, and Andrea who are so likable that they quickly won my heart, Knight manages to give the dead Alex a real presence in the story and there is an wonderful extended supporting cast who have helped Michael and Rebecca survive the dark times and who are firmly working to give the pair the kick they need to get past self doubts and guilt to achieve a well deserved happily ever after.

On the whole Butterfly is evocative and well written, with just one jarring nit that gave me pause late in the story. The characters and their struggles were captivating and there were spiritual elements to the story that I am still thinking on as well.

Have you ever had something affect you so strongly that you can't stop thinking about it? Something that seems to just sneak up on you and smack you sideways? That is what this book did to me.

It is without a doubt, one of the most heartbreaking books I've ever read and also one of the most beautiful.

It stars Michael, a widower, who is struggling desperately to get his life back together. His little girl is almost a stranger to him and no matter what he does, he cannot seem to get her to connect with him anymore.

Rebecca is a former actress who suffered a horrific attack from an obsessed fan. Now she works behind the scenes and is still trying to get her life together three years after the attack.

A fateful meeting in a dark room and both their lives change forever.

Okay, so that's the basic idea behind the book, but it doesn't go into how emotional this book was. It was written in a strange way where each chapter was written in 1st person from either Michael's or Rebecca's POV. But honestly? I think that's what made this book so powerful.

It delved so very deeply into their psyches. And their psyches are pretty banged up. Michael's just about killed me. After losing his partner and almost losing his daughter, he's hit rock bottom. When he meets Rebecca, it's like his whole world is brightened and he can see it again.

Watching him as he realizes she's more than just a pretty woman and that there's something there between them was just...gorgeous to watch. It was like taking a beautiful vase that had shattered and watch it being put back together piece by piece until miraculously it looks the same...only different.

I know I'm not doing a good job articulating just how powerfully this book affected me. I feel like I'm not doing it justice.

I will just say that if you're looking for an unbelievably powerful story that will rock you sideways, but leave you with a feeling of pure joy at the end, this is the book for you. If it doesn't effect/affect you in some ways...I dunno. All I can say is read it. You truly won't be disappointed.

You have to go into Butterfly Tattoo with a very open mind. I almost didn't give this book a chance because I thought it was male/male relationship- it isn't. It is a story that makes you feel... it is not all butterflies and rainbows with an overwhelming HEA. It is about deep love, loyalty, and healing on the inside. It seems all the characters, not just the H/h, have emotional baggage by the truck loads.

First of all, I totally thought this was an erotica book because of the unconventional romance. The hero Michael was committed to a man for 12 years and had a child with him and then after his partner, Alex, dies he finds himself falling in love with Rebecca. It was not erotica at all and had only one very mild sex scene, but yet it was so intimate. That being said it was just so different than most of the romances I have read. More along the lines of how I feel when I am reading a Megan Hart book, not warm and fuzzy more realistic.

The writing style is very different, which took some getting use to. Each chapter alternated between Michael and then Rebecca's point of view. Even though it wasn't a mystery there was a lot of suspense and anticipation. I loved that when a problem or a question was revealed, it wasn't immediately solved- it kept you guessing. Sometimes I felt it could have moved a little quicker, but then I think it would have lost the developing intensity of the relationships.

"Open up your heart and see where it leads", I sure did.

This novel was all that was promised. I loved the pure emotion found in each page. I was brought to tears more than once, and that takes a lot. I loved Rebecca's coldness at the beginning of the novel and how it was so apparent that it was to protect herself. I loved how just broken Michael was at the beginning and how they both eventually worked through their drama to find away to each other. I will say that the one problem that I had with the novel was the changing first person viewpoints. I loved the novel through and through, but the way it would switch between the first person of Michael's p.o.v. and Rebecca's p.o.v. took me out of the emotion and the novel too much. I still loved this novel.