Caring for Your Own Dead: Final Act of Love [Paperback]

Lisa Carlson (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: November 1998

This is a complete guide for those making funeral arrangements with or without a funeral director. Families, friends, and support groups who want to say goodbye in a meaningful way - not just write a big check to a funeral director - will find detailed and practical legal information in this unique guide. By taking an active role in funeral and memorial arrangements, families can save thousands of dollars while better serving the emotional needs of loved ones. "Caring for The Dead" gives the legal requirements of each state, how to obtain and file permits and death certificates, explanations of cremation and embalming, burial procedures, and other necessary information. Readers learn how to shop for the best services at the most reasonable prices, while avoiding fraudulent and deceptive mortuary practices. This landmark book helps readers take control of one of life's most intimate experiences - the final act of love for a friend or relative.

--This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

Carlson, executive director of the Funeral and Memorial Societies of America, has compiled an information-packed guide "for those making funeral arrangements with or without a funeral doctor." The book begins with a series of anecdotes that illustrates the experiences of those who have approached end-of-life arrangements in nontraditional ways. This section is followed by an overview of the funeral industry. Here readers will find information on cremation, body and organ donation, caskets, embalming, home deaths, and funerals. A substantial portion of the book is devoted to a compilation of the laws of each state. Carlson cites and summarizes the statutes governing death certificates, handling and moving bodies, reporting fetal deaths, and arranging for cremation or burial. A helpful appendix includes the Federal Trade Commission rules that protect consumers in dealings with the funeral trades. Highly recommended for public libraries.?Joan Pedzich, Harris, Beach & Wilcox, Rochester, NY
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Review

Highly recommended. -- Library Journal

Part estate-planning, part grassroots manifesto, part morbid intrigue, Caring for the Dead will educate, fascinate, instruct and infuriate. -- The Nation, Jay Kirk

The most complete guide to DIY's can be found in Lisa Carlson's Caring for the Dead. -- Life Magazine

The most comprehensive book ever produced on the subject. It's of interest to every living soul. -- John Wasik, special projects editor, Consumers Digest Magazine --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 640 pages
• Publisher: Upper Access Book Pub (November 1998)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0942679199
• ISBN-13: 978-0942679199
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #5,105,686 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

52 of 52 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Gets 10 Stars from Me, June 11, 2001

By 

MotherLodeBeth "MotherLodeBeth" (Sierras of California) - See all my reviews
(HALL OF FAME REVIEWER)    (TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (VINE VOICE)   

This review is from: Caring for the Dead: Your Final Act of Love (Paperback)

This is the update version of her original Caring For Your Own Dead and what I said about that book applies here. Lost count of the number of copies of this book I have bought, but I love giving it as a gift, and have used it myself actually when helping friends build plain pine burial boxes and oak burial boxes for loved ones.

It is a subject that needs to be discussed more, since so many people assume that ONLY a funeral home that charges thru the nose in prices, can legally handle a body or a funeral and burial. Fact is nothing could be further from the truth. The book discusses each states laws, along with what family and loved ones need to know about getting tansport permits to get the body of a loved one either home from the hospital, and prepared for a service and burial or to a local cemetary or cremation facility for handling. And the new edition has updated info on state to state laws.

Fact is my Grandma Katy who grew up in rural Montana knew all about washing and dressing family members and the whole life to death process and that death and burial need NOT be a scary and uneasy thing to take part in. The author discusses all the myths of handling the dead, and all the misconceptions people have about death and dying. Personally I cannot think of a more loving gift than welcoming a new life into the world and helping a loved on who has exited this world.

This book and the classic The American Way Of Death by Jessica Mitford are MUST reads for anyone who is mature, thoughtful and not so easy swayed to handing all their personal needs over to strangers. Ceasar Chavez' family made his plain pine burial boxes. The Amish make all their own burial boxes and have for centuries. Locally we made our friends Bea Brickeys plain pine box per her wishes.

Bill Cosbys family buried their beloved son who had been murdered, at their home. And the Amish, some Quakers and a number of Sierra Club members I know have all done the "home funeral", so the idea that you the average citizen cannot do what the Amish and the wealthy do for their own loved ones, is just not true. Read the book if for no other reason that to learn something new.

41 of 42 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Every person with a living parent should own this book!, April 8, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Caring for the Dead: Your Final Act of Love (Paperback)

This book should be given to every person whose parents are still alive! No kidding. When you need this book most, you're least likely to buy it because you'll be paralyzed with grief and not thinking straight. Know what you're going to be up against -- before you're up against it! I wish Hospice would make this available to families of its patients. While death is an uncomfortable topic for anyone, Lisa Carlson makes dealing with final arrangements so very easy and understandable. She gives you the options that the professionals will conceal. She empowers you to make the best financial decision for your loved one and your family. I can't praise this book and its author highly enough. If you know someone whose family member (or partner) is dying, do them a HUGE favor and buy it for them. They'll thank you later.

28 of 29 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Read it before you die!, November 17, 2001

By 

John L. Hoh Jr. "Author and Theologian" (Milwaukee, Wisconsin USA) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Caring for the Dead: Your Final Act of Love (Paperback)

This book is a must-read before you pre-buy your funeral and accoutrements. Caught planning someone else's funeral? Take time to read this book. This book has a load of legal information and practical advice to keep you from being scammed by those who are pros and have a ready audience in grieving people.

Not all funeral homes are devious. Some, no doubt, are very ethical and take the time to be fair with clients. But a time of grief isn't the time to seriously look into whether a home is trustworthy or not.

What you have been lead to believe about funerals and the law may not be accurate. This book is a real eye-opener!