Caring in remembered ways is caring in ways the heart knows and the world longs for. It is being all we are for the sake of all of us, moving beyond courtesy and kindness and empathy to the living compassion—the fruit of seeing deeply—that enlivens all the rest.
Says maggie: I dedicate Caring in Remembered Ways to healing professionals and volunteers—all caregivers, in whatever setting—who long to be more present and tender. I dedicate it to parents and teachers who wish to be better role models for children, to all people young and older—well or in pain, joyful or sorrowing—who, regardless of world (or personal) predicament, aspire to live purposeful, nurturing lives and long to nourish each other in ways we can feel.
"A montage that is as masterful as it is memorable . . . captures beautifully the power--and the poignancy--of caring." -- Karen Davie President/National Hospice Organizatioin
"An inspiring collection of anecdotes and meditations on the art of tender mercies. As much for caregetters as caregivers . . . . A reminder of the wonders of interconnection." -- Jon Wilson Publisher/Editor-in-Chief Hope magazine
"I love this book . . . It's a spiritual healing that will help caregivers as much as the people they care for." -- Gary Barg Publisher/Editor-in-Chief Today's Caregiver Magazine
"Pure nourishment for the heart." -- Caroline Myss author/Anatomy of the Spirit
"There are books that you read and there are books that you try to live by. Caring in Remembered Ways is a book that you try to live by, the kind that can be read from cover to cover or left on the nightstand to pick up and peruse at random . . . " -- The Ellsworth Weekly December 30, 1999
Fifteen years ago, sparked by a trip I was moved to take, I co-founded a joyful non-501(C)3 band of neighbors, providing (in the thirteen towns on our downeast Maine peninsula) free, health-related assistance to those ill, dying, incapacitated, heartsick individuals who fall between the cracks of the health-care system. Neighborcare, we called it. (Do Google -- maggie davis Neighborcare -- and be in touch if you are moved to birth a similar program in your area. Neighborcare can bloom anywhere there are those with the heart for it. In these times, where so many are separated from loved ones -- and even the best caregiving resources must screech to the edge of their parameters -- Neighborcare celebrates a boundless extended-family vision.)
Caring in Remembered Ways is "food for the heart," and a companion to the Neighborcare vision. The book honors ways of caring the heart knows--deep-seeing ways that go beyond courtesy and kindness and empathy to the living compassion that embraces all the rest. It reminds us that true caring neither starts nor stops at the bedside, but extends to all life and is fitting for caregivers both lay and professional, including physicians, nurses, homecare providers, parents, teachers, clergy---all of us who want to nourish each other in ways we can feel. Ways of being as well as ways of caring weave throughout the book. Surely, who we are colors all we do and give.
Here is more "biography," but of spirit and heart and daily life. These days we hunger to know the essence of people, not merely the facts about them -- who they are, not just what they've done. So . . .
I live simply, though appreciate more-than-the-sum-of-its-parts beauty, in all forms. I enjoy being with people (either strangers or those known to me) who are joyful and kind and purposeful. Despite my education, I'm more of the heart than the intellect, yet ever curious, especially regarding history and "story." I appreciate good music of any kind and love playing pennywhistle ballads, either solo or duet. I've lived full time on a working farm, on a house boat, in a cottage by the sea, and in two motor homes--now in one of the east coast's last working, struggling, fishing villages, which harbors many more lobster boats than yachts. I enjoy living spontaneously; at the same time, i value order. I appreciate solitary or companionable silence. My children and grandchildren love me and I, them. I delight in those who can laugh at themselves and would rather love than "be right." I'm almost a vegetarian (mostly for animal rights reasons). There are no gurus in my life. Anyone is capable of offering wisdom, I've found, including those who most would consider to be unlikely candidates. I've taken responsibility for my own health for over thirty years (using herbs, homeopathy, my understanding of the healing properties of food, and much more) and work cooperatively with my physician whom I rarely see. Years ago, I built a cabin in the woods. After clearing most of the thinnish woods with my bow saw, I dug old boards out of junk yards and bought windows and doors and stained glass from trucks and those taking down old beautiful houses (so many of which I thought deserved to be left standing), this after letting the feel of the land announce to me where my cabin might best be built. I enjoy chess and pingpong and am pretty good at them. I like reading aloud and being read to, and spending lots of time with my rescue greyhound, Muse. I love taking long walks. Sailing's great, though I'm not an expert. When I kayak, I prefer inland waters; years ago, in the Everglades, roseate spoonbills ten feet from me, on shore. Ethnic food -- delicious! Other pleasures: dancing. singing, watching dvds--everything from beautiful and inspiring movies (domestic or foreign) to gritty detective shows to Dogtown and The Dog Whisperer. Reading uplifting accounts of those who in huge or invisible ways change the world for the better. Making puppets, which I use to inspire children to an understanding of the interconnectedness of all life.
I can't live without: some solitude, animals--and people who respect and love them --warm laughter, genuineness, soulfulness. For me, witnessing tender, spontaneous, non-dutiful, acts of kindness is the greatest show in town.
Here are some of the "facts" of me: I am a mother and grandmother. I've been a remedial reading clinician at a private school and university, a One-to-One trainer for the Association for Children With Learning Disabilities, a freelance editor, a talk show co-host, a visiting author, a Poets in the Schools poet, a flower essence practitioner, co-creator/co-owner/co-manager of the nationally known concert café in Blue Hill, Maine --The Left Bank -- and, now, founder of a new Neighborcare program, Meant for Each Other: help for cats and dogs (sometimes other animals as well) whose families struggle to care for them and keep them.
I've lived on a working farm, in my cabin in the woods, on a houseboat, in a cottage by the sea, and in a motor home. These days, I'm delighted to be living at the tip of the tip of the Blue Hill peninsula in Stonington, ME.
For many years--and for over ten books mostly for young people, I was published in New York and elsewhere (e.g. Holiday House, Scholastic, Simon & Schuster). In 1993, I created a grassroots, direct-mail publishing company to move my books into the world in ways that reflect the kinship vision expressed on their pages.
My non-fiction book, Roots of Peace~Seeds of Hope, was generously praised by Howard Zinn and other well-known people; Roots is in its fourth printing. One of my picture books, The Best Way to Ripton, was a Junior Literary Guild selection. Another picture book, A Garden of Whales, now published by Firefly Books, won a Vermont Publishers merit award, was a bestseller in Maine bookstores, and is about to go into its fifth printing.
What follows is the story-behind-the-story of my book, Glory! to the Flowers, which was illustrated by a brilliant(!) fourteen-year-old girl.
The inspiration for Glory! to the Flowers blossomed in my mind in the Sierra Nevada Mountains summers ago, seconds after I finished watching a remarkable video I'd been invited to see.
I'd gone to California to be part of a flower essence intensive. The video, Messenger of Beauty, was shown toward the end of the conference. It included book excerpts and paintings from the work and life of Russian-born Nicholas Roerich, a gifted, multi-faceted man devoted to goodness and truth and beauty and the perpetuation of culture.
Watching the video, I sensed I would be writing a book for children (of all ages) that celebrated flowers and the work of Edward Bach, flower essence pioneer. I also knew that I wanted the word Glory! in the title of this book, and that I wanted to write an extensive, lyrical, simple-to-understand author's note about Bach and essences and flowers. That was the extent of the inspiration.
Home in Maine, sometime later, I wrote Glory! To the Flowers which bloomed forth fairly easily. Soon after, I set about to find an illustrator. As with Roots of Peace, Seeds of Hope, I wanted all aspects of creating the book to occur as locally as possible. I did find an illustrator, a wonderful one, though right from the first, we began to experience some logistical challenges.
Around this time, a teacher called me from a middle school in the next town over. She asked if I would be a mentor to Cara Raymaker, a fourteen-year-old who had outgrown the capacities of the school's gifted program. Had Cara read any of my books, I asked, and I sent some over. I did not want to assume, automatically, that Cara would want to work with me. It was important she felt some connection with what I was doing and who I was. After reading my books, Cara wanted to meet. We did this one afternoon in a cubicle in her school-- Cara in black leather jacket, ears dripping earrings, face smooth and pale, lips dark, hair pointed upright in various places, I in flowered skirt and long hair and no makeup. Despite the differences in our appearance, we clicked!
We decided mutually with full support of parents and teachers that Cara would come to my cabin in the woods once a month where we would play music, eat good food and write and draw and walk and learn from each other.
In the meantime, Glory's illustrator and I amicably parted company. As with Roots of Peace, again I was missing an illustrator. I raised my eyes to heaven and wondered when another would appear. But there she had been all along, or so I saw when I began to see Cara at work with her colors in her free and easy, but distinctive, style.
"Would you like to illustrate Glory!?" I asked her one Saturday, for I'd read Glory! to Cara and knew she was fond of it. "Rad! Cool!" said this young wonder.
And so began a dance between us--creative and smooth and joyful. I paid Cara good money to illustrate the book. She was worth it. As I said in my Glory! bio, "Every book I write is born with all art vividly ablaze in my mind's eye. Cara has understood this and welcomed input. . . With unflagging momentum, she's steered the artwork course we've plotted--this, exquisite evidence of her bedrock confidence. No one, of any age, could have been more consistently responsible or encouraging."
These qualities were essential when disasters struck during the printing process. Glory! was nine months late making its way into our hands. Cara was supportive during this "slow' time even though she'd dreamed of the book coming out before the first snowfall! Looking back, I hardly remember the printing constraints. More important is my friendship with Cara, which has flourished. Certainly, she is a model for others. It's Cara's hope that all young people might be ". . . totally fearless and true to themselves doing what they love to do."
This review is from: Caring in remembered ways: The fruit of seeing deeply (Paperback)
As Ms. Davis says in the introduction, the sense of the book is to "see deeply the beauty and connectedness of all life; then think, speak and act from what you see." The book is a series of essays that build nicely on that theme. What makes the book outstanding is that Ms. Davis is a genius at emphathic understanding. For example, in one sequence she reads a story about a nursing home where the television sets are kept on for a minimum number of hours a day to mentally stimulate the patients. She wonders if this is a good idea. Some of the patients who cannot speak were perhaps accomplished professional musicians who abhor harsh sounds, and the staff may find their nerves jangled by the constant background bruit and bray of television.
I think I learned more about good ways to find out how people would like to be helped from this book than from almost all the others I have read combined. I hope Ms. Davis goes on to write a book just about how to handle the types of difficult situations that one runs into in life.
I am reminded of walking in front of the Plaza Hotel in New York one night in a light drizzle around 10:30 p.m. On top of a bench is a young woman sitting alone wearing a white wedding dress and veil and sobbing uncontrollably. I wanted to comfort her somehow, but didn't have a clue as to what to do. Her grief was so overwhelming that she didn't notice me as I stood quietly nearby. I didn't know how to get her attention or to find out how to help. After ten minutes of this, I quietly walked on. Ms. Davis would have known just what to do. I'm sorry that I didn't.
Some of the essays relate to helping ill people and the dying. Ms. Davis recounts being with her parents near the end of their lives. There are many valuable messages there for all of us who will be the ones who are sick and dying, or the caregivers.
This book will make you feel more deeply alive and in love with life than ever before. It will also make you more human, in the good sense of that concept.
After reading this book, consider how you can better convey your needs to those around you in a way that will encourage them to do the same with you. That will be the beginning of many beautiful moments.
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This review is from: Caring in remembered ways: The fruit of seeing deeply (Paperback)
Maggie has written a beautiful book about taking care of our fellow man. Her words flow like a calming river, bathing our souls in caring consciousness. This book will teach you deeply and remind you we are all human. Maggie helps us hear the thoughts of the ill and dying. She takes us by the hand and leads us into their world. How do you handle a parents death, a friends illness, the loss of a pet? What do you say to a friend experiencing a loss? How do you feel about your own aging? These are issues we will all have to face in our life.
Her words inspire us to move beyond courtesy and kindness and realize empathy. She evokes this feeling through a montage of anecdotes, meditations, stories from her own life, collected quotes, eternal wisdom and rivers of thoughts which run deeply over the rocky river beds of life.
The philosophy is to see the beauty and interconnectedness of all life. The goal is to strive to think, speak and act from what we see. Maggie has been listening to her own heart and the concerns of others for years. She has absorbed this knowledge and wants to pass it on to us in a way that affirms the best a human can be. She reminds us: "...any life we care for well can remind us of all we are capable of giving."
I highly recommend this "drink for the soul" to nurses, doctors, hospice volunteers, families caring for their loved ones, and everyone who feels disconnected and wants to start learning how to care for others. How beautiful the world would be if we could all know what Maggie knows in her heart. How caring of her to share her knowledge with us.
By reading this book you will realize how the smallest deed can have a positive effect in your own neighborhood. If you nourish yourself with the attitude of compassion, at the same time you will leave attitudes of worry, self-doubt, blame, fear, resentment and pettiness to die without your care. Maggie started Neighborcare to provide hands-on-care, plant care, pet care, help with errands, meal preparation, housekeeping, help with outside chores and help with transportation to medical appointments.
Her vision for the future is to encourage others to serve the ill, dying, injured and heartsick. She applauds volunteer efforts and I believe she is going to succeed in bringing awareness to caring with this thoughtful book from her heart.
The lessons presented in "Caring in Remembered Ways" are your guides to compassion. Along the journey of collected thoughts you may not see the words through you own tears. This is when you will most clearly see the needs of your own soul and the needs of fellow souls traveling with you in life. If you plant the thoughts from this inspiring book in your soul, caring will grow.
~The Rebecca Review
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This review is from: Caring in remembered ways: The fruit of seeing deeply (Paperback)
"Caring In Remembered Ways" is subtitled "The Fruit of Seeing Deeply" and oh what a blossoming orchard of wisdom Maggie Davis passes on to us throughout her charming book. This is what we refer to as a night stand staple. A book to pick up at any moment, slowly page through, and derive comfort from re-learning how to give comfort.
There is poetry, glimpses of heart rendering stories of the dying, of family, and fresh, ripe *bites* of fruit to pick , especially regarding enriching childrens lives. One of our favorite lessons of nature was quoting George Washington Carver--"the man best known for discovering the many uses of peanuts [he] was described as a saintly man who believed that a flower will give up it's secrets to you if you love it enough--that anyone will do that."
A beautiful inspirational book in content and appearance.
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