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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars
Poor editing, formulaic story, August 1, 2007
I wanted a good Coyle book and was sorely disappointed. I expect better from Harold Coyle, but my nits may not be his fault except for the big long build-up to a quick short battle. It seems this story was thrown together to make a comment on the current Iraq situation (as well as army careerists, liberals, "real" soldiers, etc.) and then was passed to an editor whose first language isn't English. Or worse, run through some inane software program. Wrong words are used (phantom for fathom, winched for winced, etc.) throughout, sentences run on forever and the lack of proper punctuation, especially commas, will have you re-reading sentences to make sense of them. The errors truly detract from what could have been a good summer read.
I can only assume Tor-Forge/Tom Doherty Associates Books tossed this one out quickly for the money. The lack of effort shows in the little quality contained therein.
If you're a fan, add a star. If not, your reading experience may be truly disappointing. I hope Coyle forces the publisher to do better next time.
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars
Lousy editing spoils a pretty good story, November 26, 2007
One of the reviews below says exactly what I was going to say. I have always enjoyed Harold Coyle's books, particularly "The Ten Thousand", an excellent retelling of Xenophon's "The Anabasis." This one, however, was a deep disappointment.
The story is a pretty good one, but having to wade through the miserably edited text killed it for me. I started bookmarking every elementary grammar, syntax, and word choice mistake, just to see how many there would be. There were a lot.
I cringed every time I saw the word "absconded" used for "ensconsced." And referring to a unit of Rangers as a "caulk" instead of the proper term "chalk" or the caliber of a weapon fired by an American character as 7.62mm (the AK is 7.62mm, the M-16 is 5.56mm) are mistakes someone of Coyle's experience should never make. When you write military thrillers, the military details better be correct, or the reader will suspend belief quickly.
It appeared to me that the editing of this book was outsourced to Bombay. And please, for God's sake, whoever edited this book should learn to use some commas! I had to read some of the sentences multiple times to divine the intended meaning.
This terrible example reflects badly on Coyle's previous excellent work.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Waste of time., January 16, 2009
I haven't read Coyle for a few years. I wish I hadn't decided to revisit via this miserable example of military fiction. Others have said it: the editing is pathetic. This book reeks of disdain for fans of the genre. This book reminds me why I decided several years ago to move on to something else. In addition to the sixth-grade editing, the substance of the book is weak. The author dallies through 7/10ths of the book describing in detail how marionettes wreak havoc in our military services, then rushes through the climactic battle in a few pages. Weak, unsatisfying, insulting.
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