Changing Course: Healing from Loss, Abandonment and Fear [Paperback]

Claudia Black (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 1, 1999

Changing Course offers a model of healing for all adults whose lives have been burdened by pain. A family’s life together is troubled when the conditions that foster physical and emotional growth and well-being are continuously absent over time. The absence of these nurturing conditions has the cumulative effect of creating a childhood experience of chronic loss and abandonment. Within a family, the dynamics that create a sense of loss are denial, rigidity, isolation, and shame. Everyone will experience these things sometimes, or occasionally, but when any of these four factors are experienced to a severe degree they create an overriding sense of chronic loss. It is important to identify your losses. Until losses and pain are dealt with directly, the resulting feelings, while often masked, are carried into adulthood. Unless healthy coping skills are learned, this combination of past loss and pain leads to severe consequences creating even more pain in the present.

The possibility of healing is great if we allow ourselves to own our truth and garner the courage to walk through the pain. This revised edition of Changing Course (the true sequel to It Will Never Happen to Me) asks you to take action, to "get under way." It offers new exercises that will help you to begin this process.

To change course, be it a minor shift or a major turn in your life, does not mean giving up who you are, it means letting go of who you are not. It means letting go of your pain. It means letting go of an undesirable family script.

Each insight into your past and its connection to your present is like turning on the light in a dark room. It doesn’t change what is there, but now that you can see where you are going, you can go in and out freely without harm. Fear no longer drives you. Freedom moves you. Each new awareness brings new choices. Each new awareness is a turning point. In many ways recovery is like a sailboat that "comes about," turns to a new direction and allows the wind to refill its sails. Once you change course, then you are able to harness the power of the wind — your spiritual self. This is the journey charted in Changing Course.

Editorial Reviews

From the Author

When I wrote It Will Never Happen To Me in the early 1980's it was a major revelation for those raised with addiction. It would become the framework for understanding what it means to grow up in fear and shame and it would give a voice to those who lived in silence. It broke not only a family Don't Talk rule, it broke the cultural rule of Silence. While I have written other books, Changing Course is the true sequel to It Will Never Happen To Me.

About the Author

Claudia Black, M.S.W., Ph.D. is a renowned lecturer, author and trainer internationally recognized for both her pioneering and contemporary work with family systems and addictive disorders. Since the mid 1970’s Dr. Black’s work has encompassed the impact of addiction on young and adult children. She has offered models of intervention and treatment related to family violence, multi-addictions, relapse, anger, depression and women’s issues. Dr. Black designs and presents training workshops and seminars to professional audiences in the field of family service, mental health, addiction and correctional services. She authors books, interactive journals, and creates and produces educational videos for use with both the addicted client and families affected by addiction. Since 1998 she has been the primary Clinical Consultant of Addictive Disorders for The Meadows Institute and Treatment Center in Wickenburg, Arizona.

Dr. Black has been a keynote speaker on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C. and on Parlaiment Hill in Ottawa, Canada. Her workshops have been presented to an extraordinarily wide array of audiences including the U.S. Air Force Academy, the Texas prison system, the Milton Erickson Psychotherapy Conference, Maxey Training Schools for Violent Youthful Offenders and Harvard Medical School. Claudia has extensive multi-cultural experiences working with agencies and audiences in Japan, Brazil, Australia, Scotland, Iceland, Germany, England and Canada. Many of her books and videos have been translated and published abroad.

Dr. Black is the recipient of a number of National awards including the 2004 Distinguished Alumni Award from the University of Washington School of Social Work, the Marty Mann Award, the 1991 SECAD Award, the National Council on Alcohol and Drug Addiction Educator of the Year and the California Clinical Social Work award.. She is the past Chairperson of the National Association for Children of Alcoholics and presently serves on their Advisory Board.

Claudia is the author of It Will Never Happen To Me (two million copies sold and now in it’s 2nd updated edition), Changing Course, My Dad Loves Me, My Dad Has A Disease, Repeat After Me II, It's Never Too Late To Have A Happy Childhood, the Anger Guide, Relapse Toolkit, A Hole in the Sidewalk, Depression Strategies: Practical Tools for Professionals Treating Depression and Straight Talk: What Recovering Parents Should Tell Their Kids about Drugs and Alcohol. Claudia has produced twenty videos including, Double Jeopardy: Addiction and Depression and the classic Children of Denial.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback
• Publisher: M A C Pub; 2nd edition (January 1, 1999)
• ISBN-10: 0910223254
• ISBN-13: 978-0910223256
• Product Dimensions: 8 x 5.2 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (14 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #897,104 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Claudia Black, M.S.W., Ph.D. is a renowned addictions and codependency expert, author and trainer internationally recognized for her pioneering and contemporary work with family systems and addictive disorders. Since the 1970s Dr. Black's work has encompassed the impact of addiction on young and adult children. She has offered models of intervention and treatment related to family violence, multi-addictions, relapse, anger, depression and women's issues. Dr. Black designs and presents training workshops and seminars to professional audiences in the field of family service, mental health, addiction and correctional services. She serves on the Advisory Board for the National Association of Children of Alcoholics, and the Advisory Council of the Moyer Foundation. A schedule of Claudia's events are on her website claudiablack.com

Claudia is the author of It Will Never Happen To Me, Changing Course, My Dad Loves Me, My Dad Has A Disease, Repeat After Me, It's Never Too Late To Have A Happy Childhood, Relapse Toolkit, A Hole in the Sidewalk, Depression Strategies, Straight Talk, The Stamp Game, Family Strategies, Anger Strategies and her newest title Deceived: Facing Sexual Betrayal, Lies and Secrets. She has produced seven audio CDs addressing issues of addiction and recovery. They are A Time for Healing, Putting the Past Behind, Triggers, Emotional Baggage, Trauma in the Addicted Family, Imageries and Letting Go Imageries. And, she has over 20 DVDs for professionals to use working with families and clients.


Dr. Black has been a keynote speaker on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C. and on Parliament Hill in Ottawa, Canada. Her workshops have been presented to an extraordinarily wide array of audiences including military academies, prison systems, medical schools, and extensive mental health and addiction programs. Claudia has extensive multi-cultural experiences working with agencies and audiences in Japan, Brazil, Australia, Scotland, Iceland, Germany, England and Canada. Many of her books and videos have been translated and published abroad. Dr. Black is the recipient of numerous national awards including the 2004 Distinguished Alumni Award from the University of Washington School of Social Work.


Claudia resides in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two Westies.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

38 of 42 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Great insight and solutions for both addicted & family., October 4, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: Changing Course (Hardcover)

Claudia Black has an inside track of what it feels like to be a family member in a family where addictive behavior is going on. She is able to write in understandable fashion the complex dynamics that go on in addictions and recovery. She never fails to understand the heart and soul and the sheer pain involved in addiction; she also provides insight and solutions for healing. Great work! All her work is very insightful. This is an author who cares about those who read her books.

7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Book, December 7, 2007

By 

W. Ess (Tulsa, OK.) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Changing Course: Healing from Loss, Abandonment and Fear (Paperback)

This book I found to be exceptional in helping you to determine what issues you are dealing with, as well as very practical and workable solutions as to how to begin making some positive corrections to your own life and the way you deal with the difficulties.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars I loved this book!, April 8, 2009

By 

Sandra Klein (Poulsbo WA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Changing Course: Healing from Loss, Abandonment and Fear (Paperback)

This book helped me understand why I struggle with some of the things I do and helped me take responsibility for how I live my life today. I especially appreciated the 'exercises' wherein you are given the opportunity to reflect and respond to what is being discussed which truly made me become involved in my own healing process. So many 'self-help' books I've read were just a passive read. This one invited and encouraged me to take action and gave me the direction to do just that.