Customer Reviews

Children of the Corn

5 star:		(5)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(5)
2 star:		(5)
1 star:		(14)

 

 

I'll spare you some wasted time... seriously. Yeah, this movie is that bad. I'd rather be bludgeoned unconscious with dried ears of corn than watch this film again. (I live in Iowa, so this is an option!) I had a few unintentional laughs, especially during the child killing spree the main protagonist went on during his escape attempt. This film definitely has the highest body count of children killed in any horror film I've seen. Between that and the "sex scene" in the film, I'm still shivering. But anyway... I digress.

"Children of the Corn," in case you actually are living in a cornfield, is a remake of a prior film of the same name, both of which are based on a Steven King story. (I can still remember one of the creepy lines from the original film, although I haven't seen it in years: "He wants you too, Malachi. He wants you, too.") The plot is quite interesting for a horror film: it's set in a small Nebraska town and revolves around a religious cult composed of children that worship a being that lives in the corn fields. A husband and wife encounter the kids, and the events that follow make up the rest of the story. I'll not go into it in more detail, as other reviews have done it in already.

Unlike a lot of people, I don't mind so much that Hollywood is hell-bent on making endless remakes, but I wish they would at least make a better remake. This film is in no way better than its predecessor. The acting is atrocious - not that they were given very good dialogue. The lines were forced, and the actors are stiff and unbelievable. The special effects are laughable and, if you can believe it, worse than the 1984 film. So much for progress. I think that I read that the SyFy (formerly known as Sci-fi) channel backed the making of this film or something to that effect. I've gotten to the point where if I see Sci-fi channel on a DVD, I run.... I turn around and flee for my life. This movie should have been no different, but I only found this out post-viewing. If the idea of this film is interesting to you, by all means, go watch the original film. It's far superior. You've been warned! :)

Children of the Corn (2009): 1 out of 10: Good lord did they screw this movie up. First, the writer (George Goldsmith) who adapted the original Children of the Corn is some sort of savant. Apparently all the good scenes in the original movie (The killing of the adults, Isaac and Malachi going at it in the climax, were his invention.) This movie cut all that good stuff out and replaced it with the Viet Cong and public child sex.

The blame rests squarely on Mr. Stephen King's shoulders. He did not like the changes the 1984 and wanted to stick to his original story. Therefore, the movie takes place in the mid-seventies and the main couple is a divorcing, squabbling mess. In addition, the main character hallucinates Viet Cong shooting in the corn which looks ten times worse than it sounds. Oh they have a sex scene in a church 'The time for fertilization has come!' where two teens have sex while nine year olds look on masturbating corn cobs.... good lord I didn't need to see that.

The casting is horrible. If I never see Kandyse McClure again (in the Linda Hamilton role) it will be to soon. She ruins the first half of an already horrible film. Daniel Newman as Malachi and Preston Bailey as Isaac ruin the second half. Daniel looks like he is reading off cue cards while Preston is about as threatening as a kitten.

Oh and if that all was not a big enough F You to the audience, the monster never shows up at the end.

It isn't like the original Children of the Corn was Casablanca or something but good lord this is an embarrassment for all involved.

I agree with the other reviewer when he said that this movie leaves you wanting more (maybe for the wrong reasons), but it follows the Stephen King's original short story not the 1984 film, so you shouldn't go in expecting it to recreate every detail of the original. My only real issue with this reboot/"re-imagining" is that Preston Bailey who plays Isaac is terrible. It seemed as if he was handed his lines immediately before scenes were shot and was scrambling to get all of the words out before he forgot what he was supposed to say. Also, his delivery was just awful... he always used the same tone and never seemed to put emphasis on any of his words. John Franklin's performance as Isaac in the original was powerful and commanding, it was easy to see why even the older children would follow/fear him... here it's laughable when Malachi (Daniel Newman) takes orders from Isaac. Negatives aside, all of the other cast members played their parts well (Daniel Newman gave the best performance imo) and the blood/gore seemed to be of a higher quality than what's typical of a SciFi (SyFy) Original. Children of the Corn was actually a decent flick, worth watching at least once... don't go in expecting much, but don't let the "SyFy Original" tag completely scare you off either.

Watched this on SYFY. Pointless remake that comes not even close to Stephen Kings Classic!
80% of this movie is the Husband/Wife "complaining/crying" and fighting with each other! Terrible casting here. They are suppose to be married come on! Just Dumb from the beginning to the horrible ending.
This movie leaves you wanting more? More what? Corn on the cob? Terrible remake! I can't believe I spent this much time writing this review! Big Disappointment!

Please don't buy this. It doesn't deserve your money! Spend your money on the HILLS RUN RED or a bag of frozen/canned corn instead of this piece of crap!!!!!!!!

This has to one the worst made for TV movie I've seen, never mind it was a remake of a Stephen King Classic. The lead actress really overacted her part, but I really can't blame her with the script she took her lines from. The children aren't even in the least bit scary and the little boy who played Issac recites his lines like he's still trying to remember them. There is absolutely no atmosphere, eeriness or creepiness which the original movie had an abundance of. This version is stale and falls flat on its face. The male lead is the only one who is even slightly believable. Who wrote the script? I had to keep asking myself did they write this for adults.

Good Grief, but was this truly hideous remake a big pile of--garbage!
We're treated to the most obnoxious and repulsive "heroine" ever to appear in a horror flick. As portayed by actress Kandyse McClure, "Vicki" is the wife from hell. For the first thirty minutes, we're treated to her screeching, cursing, degrading her long suffering husband, David Anders, a recent Vietnam vet. The wife jeers and insults him in a non-stop barrage that never ends. When the husband runs over a corn child, the wife turns up the insults and one wonders what the husband sees in her--and why he takes it.

When the wife is finally murdered, you want to applaud.And the rest of the movie is just one endless marathon were the husband runs through cornfields. His pursuers are so fat, you can imagine them ordering wash tubs of corn dogs during breaks. Oh, yeah, we're also supposed to be scared of a little boy whose supposed to be the leader--yet, he comes off as a brat who needs his diapers changed real fast.

And then we have a bizarre sex scene where a teenage couple strip naked before all the other oorn children have sex--with the little ones all grinning and jumping up and down and leering at each other. You can imagine the director screaming: "Act like you love it! Act like dirty little kids!"

As for the corn monster, there isn't one. We see corn stalks shaking and then the hero begins to shriek hysterically and the next thing we're shone, is the hero trussed up like a scarecrow. This is a typical Sci-Fi Film, made on a poverty-row budget with a cast of no-name and no-talent performers. This woul be a fun movie to show at a Worst Movie of All Time Party--where it would join the ranks of other worst movie candidates like "Rest Stop," "Lake Placid II" and "100 Million BC" starring King of the Z'--Christopher Atkins.

The DVD version has a nude sex scene with two of the "children" getting it on (on top of a church altar) in front of an audience of 5 to 18 year olds. How's that for classy? I don't remember anything like that in Stephen King's original short story but the makers of this film swear they are being faithful to the source material. In many ways they are but this film is so ineptly executed that it is an even bigger insult to Stephen King than the original (not so bad) film was.

The only bright spot in this rancid remake is Daniel Newman as Malachi. That guy can act and he gives Courtney Gaines a run for his money with his amazing and sympathetic portrayal of Malachi. Aside from Newman the rest of the acting is simply awful, particularly from the "children" who seem barely able to speak english. The kid playing Isaac isn't even elementary school play material. This kid is an absolutely rotten actor.

The script, while in theory is closer to the story, brings in all sorts of nonsense about Burt being a Viet Nam vet who is apparently experiencing post-traumatic stress in the corn field (and of course we get the obligatory flash back sequences). If you thought the original film was slow paced, try sitting through this snooze fest. Burt and Vicki yack and yack with a dead body in the trunk and then Burt wanders through the corn for a half hour experiencing flash backs that are just pointless and sleep inducing.

And guess what? The original film had BETTER visual effects in it than this one since this remake has ABSOLUTELY NO visual effects whatsoever. YOU WON'T SEE HE WHO WALKS BEHIND THE ROWS IN THIS FILM. Not even a glimpse. Not even a big fluffy glowing cloud formation. Not a gopher from hell in sight. NOTHING. THEY DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER.
What a complete waste. Yes the movie ends like the story with Burt and Vicki dead on crosses with their eyes gouged out but to see the actual end of the film you have to watch the credits all the way to the end and then the film picks up again with the children out in the corn field about to act out the finale of the film. Why on earth this was done is a complete mystery. Perhaps incompetent director Donald Borchers forgot to film any connecting scenes and decided to show the credits before inserting the final portion of the film. Who knows. It's all so amateurish, awful and absurd that you won't care and probably won't make it through more than a few minutes of this entirely terrible film.

Well...maybe not entirely terrible as the set design in the church is a little better than in the first film and the haunting theme music of Johnathan Elias is retained for this version. And of course there is the truly excellent performance by Daniel Newman as Malachi. Still, a great score and one good actor can't save this truly worthless, wretched mess.

In 1984 Stephen King gave the world a reason to fear the children of Nebraska by writing Children of the Corn. Usually kids run around causing minor mischief pissing off a few parents here or there. However these kiddies are a bit different. Instead of the normal path, they form a murderous cult taking out every adult in sight. This is a concept that no doubt would reduce Santa to jif causing him to then swing his FTL's around over his head in a clear plastic bag. Since it has a good cult following the Sci-fi channel thought it must be a good idea to do a remake. Usually the remake idea never follows through well as was the case with Children of the Corn.

In this version we have a couple, with their marriage on the rocks, taking a little road trip. As they cruise through the cornfields of Nebraska they plow down a kid who runs across the road. Obviously not helping the marriage counseling process. Now they're freaking out and notice the kid's throat was slit and decided to get all Tommy Boy on him by throwing him in their trunk. As they come to the next town they soon find a pack of little punk kids of supernatural sorts and are forced into battle. After about a half hour into the film it really starts to go downhill. The main characters acting gets way to corny as he challenges the kids using his military experience. It's quite hilarious to watch this guy get chased down by some kids as young as 7, not all being male.

So in conclusion, the remake had nowhere near the effect the original had. There were some legit moments of enjoyment and even a couple laughs along the way. Unfortunately there wasn't enough to keep you interested. Even from a strictly B standpoint it couldn't work. Now we don't want to be too critical so have to give some credit being that it was a sci-fi channel picture that was a cut above most. Compared to their usual disasters like Grizzly Rage or Mega Snake this one ranks high on their list. As far as a recommendation we can only say feel free to check it out when it's on t.v, but please don't spend $20 some odd dollars. Do like Santa would do and save it for a lap dance.

I'm watching this movie right now, and it is so bad I have to write a commentary.

I liked the original version.

This one is atrocious.

It is the mid 70's and an interracial couple is driving through Nebraska. Unlikely, yes, and even more unlikely is that the woman is the black one.

The woman is loud, mean, and constantly complaining. Constantly. The man seems cool headed and has recently returned from a tour in 'Nam. I hope the woman gets killed but I doubt it. She really needs to die. I'm surprised the husband hasn't done it already. Seriously, she's taking jabs at him about Vietnam, calling him a rapist and child killer and stuff. Not cool. Why hasn't he smacked the face off her? She is begging for it. C'mon. Domestic violence laws weren't as crippling back then.

The first 35 minutes of this movie was them fighting in the car. It was just as annoying as watching a couple fight in real life.

Oh my god I just saw the man just do a Steven Segal move where he broke a kid's arm bones out. Oh he just killed a kid. I guess his frantic wife was right haha.

I'm not sure what the point of this movie is, or what the "moral" is supposed to be. Religion is bad? I'll go with that... as long as we include KING's religion.

The new Issac is weak. I can barely understand him. He mumbles and is too quiet. And why does Malaci always have blood all over him? Shouldn't he wash his hands? I would. I hate sticky hands!

Why can't they just re-do movies with better film and effects? It always seems like the acting is WORSE. And the directors always want to change the story to "make it their own". Get a life.

The man is having Vietnam flashbacks in the corn field now. He just killed 2 kids. More flashbacks. Lots of blonde kids here. Naturally they are evil. Nothing more evil than blonde people and Nazis. Remember WW2? This movie is really bad. He just stabbed a 5 year old blonde kid in the juggler.

Dinner time at the kid's camp. Fat girl just slapped someone's hand who was trying to take her plate of corn. Funny. Oh now here's the "Time of Fertilization" aka the underage sex scene. This is inappropriate and just creepy. What kind of sick director would insist on showing this? Little kids are watching them do it and are cheering them on. Wow that was so very wrong. Glad my daughter wasn't watching this movie with me. Instead of Fertilization Time, maybe a funeral would be more appropriate? I mean, 5 or so kids died today.

Are these kids Amish? Only Amish kids dress like that, from what I've seen. And I grew up in Iowa.

Wow they really did kill the wife. Good. I expect the guy will die too now. So now I don't really care about anyone in this movie. Oh the guy just died. The end.

Oh not the end. They have an after credits scene. It isn't worth watching. Really.

The film itself was directed by Donald P. Borchers who also ended up taking Stephen King's original short story to adapt into the screenplay that produced this wreck of a film. Children of the Corn is Borcher's third time behind the director's chair but from his first time having worked with horror as he has worked as both crew and producer on a large amount of horror films in the past including a few movies you may have heard of (and loved or hated) such as Leprechaun 2, Highlander 2, The Fog, and a personal favorite of mine - The Howling. Did I mention he was also one of the producers on the original 1984 release?

The 2009 release of the classic Stephen King's Children of the Corn should have taken a few queues of the 1984 release that had come before it. This movie trumps almost every other re-make that had come out in 2009 in teaching the lesson of what not to do while re-making a classic horror film. I'm actually shocked it came out as bad as it did with how easy of a concept the film actually has but it seemed that everything they could do to make it wrong was what they went with for the story. With Borchers past experience in the horror genre I really have to question how this film turned out as it did. Even the actors felt underused as the film went out.

We open the film with Burton Stanton (an actor you will easily recognize from a slew of television shows) and his wife Vicki (Kandyse McClure of Battlestar Galactica fame) are driving across country and it's this initial scene that blows the movie as Vicki is really just more cruel than necessary and doesn't seem to play the part right. The problem is after Battlestar you know Kandyse has the acting chops she just doesn't seem to come off as believable hateful as she is supposed to be in this film. When the couple finally hit a child in the car and have to find a town they come across a nearly deserted city and find it full of only children with Issac (Preston Bailey who ends up playing Cody on Dexter and Nicholas in the 2010 remake of The Crazies) in charge.

For those that don't know the basis of the plot, the children have taken over the city killing all of the adults and using them as sacrifices to a creature that lives in the cornfield whom they worship as a God. The big bonus of being able to see what is ruling these children's lives never happens as there is no payoff that shows what it is and the ending felt both rushed and unnatural with how Burton falls into having flashbacks that overlay the horror he is experiencing.

ScyFy has put together some impressive re-makes in the past. Their production value on the Dune (yes I know not horror) miniseries comes to mind. However I will quickly admit that all I am doing right now is looking forward to the Dimension Films re-make that will be coming out in the near future to wipe this abomination out of my memory. With being involved in the original release of this film I don't quite know how Borchers was able to steer this in such a wrong