Customer Reviews

What Children Learn from Their Parents' Marriage: It May Be Your Marriage, but It's Your Child's Blueprint for Intimacy

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This book is excellent and really focuses on average families. What kids grown up living in their households is really a reflection on what their future goals will be as molded by their parents. It is a wonderful book to read if you are looking for a practical, easy to understand book on what you can do to make your marriage more wholesome and the reflection of that will set the pace for your children in the future and what choices they make for themselves. I highly recommend it.

It may not come as a shock to most parents that the lessons our children learn in childhood are carried with them throughout their lives, but what this book makes clear is how our own marriages form a blueprint from which all our children's future relationships will be built. Siegel creates a compelling narrative using lots of case histories and anecdotes, which makes this an easy read. She helps us identify not only what we are doing wrong in our marriage, but what we're doing right, which makes our foibles a lot easier to acknowledge. She also helps us to explore how deeply our own parents' marriage affected us. A very important book with a very important goal--"the opportunity to create a positive legacy of love for our children."

I think that basically every adult should read this book. While the title might suggest a focus on children, the subject matter is really the characteristics of a healthy partnership that, if present and observed by children will give them a positive example that will help them when it is time for them to form their own adult relationships. Or undermine them if they learned unhelpful lessons. Regardless of if a partnership has or will have children, the book is very clear about the characteristics of a healthy and fulfilling marriage. Of course, it also address It is also very concrete about what "for the children" really means in a marriage. Beyond the subject matter, the book is clearly written, is supported by and refers to current research, and uses understandable examples/anecdotes to reinforce the points in the book.

I expect most people will find one section or another uncomfortable because it does make clear ways that we can develop patterns from our own childhood that lead us to do unhelpful things but that seem very rational/reasonable to us.

A month after having bought and read the book, I've purchased three other copies for other friends and family and have recommended it to many other friends.

I'm a psychotherapist and the information in this book has been helpful as I have worked with my clients to help them see how their behavior impacts their children. I really like this book.

This book is one of the best books I have ever read. It should be required reading for everyone, and can help you understand the dynamic of any relationship in your life, not only between parents and their children.

I decided to order several (8) copies of this book from a few different Amazon vendors. All of the copies arrived within a week, to a week and a half. Unfortunately, the copy from this vendor showed it was in stock at the time I ordered it, but arrived almost a MONTH later!!

The book is really wonderful. The service from thus vendor , not so much......