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24 of 25 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Big ol' bag of BULL., February 25, 2006
This review is from: 10 Bad Choices That Ruin Black Women's Lives (Paperback)
First off, if I could give this book 0 stars, I would. Second, notice the title refers to the things black women do to mess up their lives, but all TEN mistakes are about relationships. Last I checked, women make a whooooole lot of mistakes than just sleeping with other people's men. Oops! I forgot - all black women are out to do is get rich, black husbands.
Also, there is NOTHING in this book that solely relates to black women. This easily could've been written by a woman of any race, directed to an audience of any race. The only thing Dr. Cornish mentioned that's even remotely ethnic-related was skin color, the light versus dark angle. But guess what - replace "light" and "dark" with "skinny" and "fat" and you're right back to the issues that ALL of us face as women. Is this woman honestly trying to tell us that only BLACK women sleep with married men, or sleep with men too soon, or rush into marriage too early? Please. Cornish touches very briefly on the issues of interracial relationships as well a VERY short mention on bisexual men. The way she was able to cram in so much homophobia on just a couple of short pages is a talent, indeed. As for white men, I'll spoil it for you - if the relationship the woman is having during of Cornish's little stories is ANYTHING but a black man, the dude is evil.
My problem isn't with the poor writing, the constant mention of her other book, or the repeated mentions of her TV show, the HORRIBLY annoying rhyming titles that are on EVERY...FRIGGING...PAGE, or the fact that Dr. Cornish doesn't even bother to discuss WHY some women act as they do (the only childhood trauma she touches on is her own), or the fact that some single woman is trying to tell other single women how to have successful relationships. (What's next? Is Oprah going to write a book about parenting?) My problem is her writing a general relationship advice book with was full of nothing but "no DUH" kind of so-called tips (don't sleep with a married man? WHOA, NO KIDDING!) and then pushing it off as a book solely for women of color. By painting us as a bunch of needy, gold-digging, colorstruck idiots, Dr. Cornish is no better than the TV producer she berates so heavily in the first chapter.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Excellent book Every Black woman should read, February 10, 2004
This review is from: 10 Bad Choices That Ruin Black Women's Lives (Paperback)
I picked this book up after a friend suggested I read it. I read a chapter a day until I finished the book. Dr. Cornish compiled some things we as black women tend to do (she even admitted making some of the same bad choices) outlines the problems, and offers wonderful suggestion to help us STOP making the same bad choices. Bottom line is you have to be willing to hold yourself accountable and admit you are making these mistakes, and be willing to stop them. She will tug at your heart when she discusses the deaths of her mother and Aunt to men, and discusses how their bad choices played a role in their deaths. Six out of every black woman are either in bad relationships, share a man or choose to be celibate. Are you one of those six women? I also feel this book is not just for black women. I think any woman can read this book and find something in this book they can use to help them make wiser life choices.
In this book she will discuss:
1. Sisters Dissin Sisters ?
I wish every black woman would read this chapter!!! It's time for the madness to stop!!! We need to stop talking about each other, and really learn to love our fellow sisters.
2. No Money, No Honey
3. Exchanging Sexual dealings for loving
4. Looking for Mr. Right in the Wrong Places
5. Using your finance to maintain his romance
6. Staying on, although the respect is gone
7. Loving the "Married Bachelor"
8. Emotional dependency, plus unplanned pregnancy
9. decent proposal/Indecent disposal
10. Getting to the Church before time
One or more of these chapters will wake you up and make you take stock of your life. Take stock of the choices you have made, and hopefully you will make better choices in the future. This is an excellent book!!!
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Wonderful! It was like talking with my sister!, March 26, 1999
This is a wonderful book for any African-American woman who has dealt with abusive and rocky relationships with black men. After the author discuss various senarios, at the end of the book she wonderfully points out that we should not go through excessive changes to get men in high places. We need to love ourselves first, and then everything else will fall in place. In God's time. With a lot of self-love, we can become women of high achievement, on our own! On our own merit! Scary, but I know it to be true. I was once one of the sisters outlined in this author's book. I had the have the man with the BIG JOB, the BIG CAR, the BIG BANK ROLL, ETC. I learned the hard way, instead, of basking in someone else's spotlight create your own! The author brought this point out thorougly. I never met the author, but it was like my best girl friend was speaking to me. I will definitely recommend this book to my sister-friends, nieces, and other women. I will also buy this author's next book! Actually, I look forward to its publishing. One last thing, this author lost her mom at an early age through the hands of her mother's abusive boyfriend. She actually witnessed her mother's murder. Through time and her father's love, she made it through. Just think, that alone should be encouragement for us all. This is a strong sister, a survivor! YOU GO GIRL!! Your sister-friend, MaryAnn Jackson, San Diego, CA
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