Choking on Marlon Brando (Hardcover)

~ (Author)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

"It is a very, very straightforward concept indeed that life is not like a movie, but one I have amazing difficulty in grasping," writes Quirke, a well-known UK movie critic, in this chronicle of her tumultuous love life with men on-screen and in-person. Clever and forthright, Quirke's debut is a charmer; she knows herself well, and actors even better, regularly capturing the allure of any given leading man in a single phrase: George Clooney is a Cary Grant type who "has played and will play a man of the same age for three decades. That age being: no age at all. The Prime"; in Klaus Kinski, Quirke sees "handsomeness gone insane...as though every feature on his face is trying to out-handsome the others." Just as precise and memorable when writing about real-life lovers ("That is what he wanted above all. The look on my face. That is all you're allowed to give some men"), Quirke's nimble story-telling is enough to forgive a less-than-dynamic tale-Quirke loves man, man loves Quirke, things go bad, repeat-but her reluctance to take action may frustrate an audience expecting personal growth or obstacles overcome; nevertheless, fans of snappy writing, movie actors and dead-end romance will find Quirke's book a treat.
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Product Description

Choking on Marlon Brando is the story of a young female film critic's love-life is affected and nearly ruined by her obsession with male movie stars. As her increasingly hapless hunt for the right man unfolds and her television and newspaper career unravels, our heroine finally begins to understand that difficult truth: that life is not like the movies.

Entwined within the narrative of her real-life love affairs is a kaleidoscope of digressions on great screen actors--her early obsession with Brando, her later dream-life with Gerard Depardieu, a personal ad seeking out Tom Cruise, a disastrous climactic encounter with Jeff Bridges. It's a helter-skelter ride through love and the movies which reads like a screwball comedy. But our heroine is no screwball; she seems to know everything about movies and the human heart, and painfully little about anything else. Written in a fresh and utterly engaging voice, Choking on Marlon Brando is moving and hilarious, a bittersweet and endearing story of a woman who can't draw the line between her live life and the art she loves.

Product Details

• Hardcover: 310 pages
• Publisher: Overlook Hardcover (July 19, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1585679151
• ISBN-13: 978-1585679157
• Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.3 x 1.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #1,050,494 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, August 26, 2007

By	Kevin Killian (San Francisco, CA United States) - See all my reviews (TOP 100 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)

I had read Antonia Quirke's book on JAWS that she wrote for the uneven BFI series on notable films, but I must re-read it now that I know so much more about its author, sort of a real life Bridget Jones who proves that sometimes, you can get too much into the movies and they prevent you from having satisfying experiences in your real life romantic life. What guy in real life can compare to the rush of sexuality young Antonia got while watching STREETCAR on TV as a young girl? And that's just the beginning of an amazing read, in which she lays bare the dynamism of literally hundreds of male screen idols, while a few dozen earthly Englishmen fail to capture her attention for more than a few dates apiece.

Her book is very funny in parts, and in other parts she seems to recoil from the path she's leading, so the clash of the two genres, comedy and a tragic self-destruction, produces sparks but also gives the book a rueful texture. Makes you feel complicit even for reading it. Now and then one just wants her to find the right bloke, but most of the time one longs for her to meet another loser in life while drooling over another he-man in the cinema. She makes you appreciate the erotic perfection of even unlikely idols, such as Kevin Costner. She knows he's dopey, dull, superpatriotic, and probably conservative, but he's got something going on and she details it all. Remember Madonna pretending to gag after Costner told her that her show was "neat"? Hark Antonia Quirke: "That hollow cacophonous bird made of beaten tin painted gold (and failed actress) who sticks a finger down her throat after meeeting Costner [is] blind to the non-synthetic idiosyncrasies that unspun blandness might contain." He has a "beautiful veim of sadness running through everything he does, like when the light begins to strain at the end of a summer's day." You think David Thomson has it bad for Nicole Kidman? Wait till you hear Quirke on Depardieu!! Or Keanu Reeves, the male Marilyn Monroe: "Like Marilyn, Keanu introduces an electric tension into everything he does because of the combination of uncontrollable charisma and technical incompetence."

Most controversial will be her discussion on 228-9 of which star has, like her boyfriend Jonathan, the "perfect arse." She names James Dean, Dennis Quaid, Richard Gere, Gael Garcia Bernal--the usual suspects, reaching out to Terence Stamp in (POOR COW) and David Hemmings--she's as patriotic as Kevin Costner. She dismisses Clint Eastwood and Sam Shepard. But stop the presses, why is Dustin Hoffman on the list of "great arses"? The thought of it makes my gorge rise. And Jim Carrey? Yeah, his is great--for talking through! She names the four compass points that the perfect arse must balance itself among-- "a Gene Kelly gluteal muscle and a Keith Richards scrawn, a slovenly acre of sexless John Wayne flesh and a priapic preening Antonio Banderas baboon backside." I'm squinting but in the center of all those I am utterly failing to locate Dustin Hoffman!

1 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Book of the Year, August 2, 2007

By	Garth Whitson (Missoula, MT USA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

Wow. This book is stunningly great. Antonia Quirke's writing -- her voice, her control, her sheer prowess -- is blazingly magnificent. This book is a treasure, a discovery, a triumph of publishing. Pick up the book, read the first paragraph, and get carried away.