Customer Reviews

Choosing a Jewish Life: A Handbook for People Converting to Judaism and for Their Family and Friends

5 star:		(32)
4 star:		(18)
3 star:		(5)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

I had a close female friend who was converting to Judaism a few years ago, and she got me interested in it. I checked out this book from the library and was amazed how richly informative and caringly written it was...this book is indeed a mitzvah. I think the earlier reviewer's criticism of Ms. Diamant's supposed assertion that the principles she introduces do not apply to Orthodox conversions is a little misguided...I think Ms. Diamant is merely acknowledging her lack of expertise in Orthodox matters and prefers to defer to an actual authority on Orthodoxy rather than attempt to tackle that area herself...she is a born Jew but raised in a more liberal tradition. But yes, the book provides spiritual enlightenment to all would-be converted Jews, be they ultimately Orthodox, Conservative, Reform or Reconstructionist.

I ultimately never made that leap, though I no longer really consider myself Christian anymore, either. I agree w/ Judaism too much for that. I guess i'm just a secular pagan Stoic, a friendly gentile w/ a deep admiration for Judaism and its traditions...and I'm probably too much the hellenic sensualist to fit the Jewish mold anyway. But it was a very spiritually uplifiting experience, my close encounter with Judaism, and this book was a profound part of that experience.

Highly recommend it to anyone converting or who knows a friend or family member who is pondering conversion.

I have had a building interest in Judaism for more than 5 years now and have been contemplating conversion for more than a year. I agree with one reviewer (she encountered certain individuals that "discouraged her" and therefore she decided to study Orthodoxy) in that many religious or Orthodox Jews still do not acknowledge converts nor do they encourage conversion but as the book mentions, the first Jews, Abraham and Sarah were converts.

To convert because you happen to be engaged to a Jew is not a reason to convert and I think because that situation is becoming more and more common the book discusses conversion within a relationship or family as well as a single person converting for their own reasons.

As a single woman contemplating conversion I found myself questioning a lot of different things and I didn't know who or what to turn to. I met with a Conservative Rabbi that was not necessarily encouraging but was open to helping me the best way that he could. I don't know if it was because he was an Assistant Rabbi or because he wasn't the right Rabbi for me but I chose to discontinue meeting with him and continued my search for "my" Rabbi as the book mentions. I think the Rabbi you choose makes a huge difference in that he/she will be your guide and teacher on your journey through the conversion process.

This book has answered so many of my questions that I thought no one could answer. I thought I was the only one that was concerned with whether Israel would ever feel like a "homeland" to me or why some Jews I spoke with were so open and welcoming while others were close-minded and discouraging. This book has been a huge help to me and if you are contemplating Judaism, this is a great start. It's important to know that while the book won't answer all of a convert's questions (some questions will only be answered by you and your own feelings) it will answer many and be a great start.

For some people, to change one's religious faith is not an easy task. For others, their decision is based on pragmatic reasons or from a strong internal conviction and hence their choice is clearer - less cluttered with doubts and fears. In her book, "Choosing A Jewish Life", Anita Diamant addresses the issues involved in conversion and she writes her book to guide both the perplexed and those who have already made their decision.

Diamant's intention on writing this book was to provide an approachable and practical guide to those who are in the process of converting to the Jewish faith. At the beginning of each section, there is a list of questions which resemble the FAQ's (frequently asked questions) found in so many web sites. She then proceeds to answer these questions and her compassion and love of the religion shines in her answers. Diamant rarely has one answer for each question. Rather she formulates a reply with the consideration of individuals who have different needs and philosophies. For instance, in the chapter about informing one's parents about converting, she writes, "Every family is different. In some households, intimate conversations are completely taboo and there may be little or no discussion of your decision. There are families where conversion becomes the focus of unrelated and long-standing family issues. And sometimes converts confront the painful fact that members of their immediate family harbor anti-Semitic stereotypes about Jews and Judaism."

Many rabbis and advanced Jewish scholars would undoubtedly be annoyed with the brief coverage of some of the Jewish rituals and mitzvoth in this book. They many even have an issue with the proselyting tone coming from Diamant's gentle encouragement. Clearly "Choosing A Jewish Life" was written for the uninitiated and "beginners" of the Jewish faith and should not be taken as the all encompassing text for learning about Jewish life. It does however cover certain conversion issues in detail such as the pain of leaving Christian festivities, what happens during the conversion rituals of bet din and the mikvah, the conversion of children, and several concrete descriptions of how people celebrated their conversion with the temple community or just family and friends. The covenant of circumcision (B'rit Milah) is also covered in depth from a historical view point to the Hatafat Dam B'rit, the religious ritual for converts who are not circumcised.

On a personal note, I found "Choosing A Jewish Life" to be an easy read but lacking in the comprehensive discussion of the halakhah and contemporary reform Jewish practices found in the other books recommended by our rabbi. This book is a good place to start for the curious and those beginning on the path to conversion but should not be taken as the exclusive handbook for Jewish conversion. As to acknowledge this point, in the appendices Diamant provides a practical resource guide to the different Jewish movements and a short bibliography for converts and the process of conversion.

A truly loving book, that feels as if it was written personally for you. If you are considering conversion to Judaism, no matter by what path, this is a book that you must read. Of all the books that I read going through this long process this was by far the best. It deals with the real issues that we all face and gives confidence as it is written from an experiential base not shared with many other authors. It is an inclusive book that gives you support and pride in your quest.

As a person choosing Judaism solely out of spiritual and religious conviction I didn't feel my needs were met. This book seems like it is an incredibly valuable tool to those who are part of an interfaith couple but not so valuable to those who are doing this alone.
One thing I found in this book that I have not found in many other books on converting to Judaism is information on children. As a single mother i am searching everywhere on info on how to best introduce Judaism to my daughter and how she can be included on this journey of mine. I am grateful about the inclusion of that subject in Mrs. Diamant's book but again it was geared towards interfaith families never single ones.

I picked up this book as an effort to further my ponderings on Judaism, and was not disapointed. Diamant has created a user friendly, practical and heartfelt guide to Conversion that is filled with useful information, tips, telephone numbers, suggested reading material, and all the other goodies including sample prayers, poems, gift suggestions and advice.

Diamant does an excelent job of conveying the seriousness of the choice to Convert, and explains in plain language what some of the problems you'll face as a convert are. "The December Dilemma", cool responses from born-Jews, telling your family about your decision to convert, and more.

If this book has one flaw it is that its focus is very narrow, focusing on the nuts and bolts of conversion only and not covering ideas and processes for practicing a Jewish life which is entwined with the conversion experience.

All in all a hearty recomendation.--AM

This is a good general guidebook to begin with; it's informative and valuable without being too brief or too long. However, one shouldn't feel that one should only ever read this one conversion book, since there are so many other good ones out there, as well as ones that go into more in-depth and detailed territory than this one. It's not meant to be the be-all and end-all on this subject. There's a lot of valuable information in here, such as choosing a Hebrew name, adapting to a whole new personal history and outlook on life, the types of conversion ceremonies, which denomination you'd like to convert through, the wedding ceremony, and how to tell your family and friends about your decision. And yes, this book is written from a Progressive standpoint, but as Ms. Diamant points out in the introduction, that's not meant as an insult to the Orthodox world, but rather because, not only is it not her territory, but also because there is such a large gulf between the Orthodox and Progressive circles of Judaism when it comes to "who is a Jew." If someone were interested in an Orthodox conversion, s/he would have gone to a book like Maurice Lamm's 'Becoming a Jew,' not a conversion guidebook specifically geared towards those of more Progressive persuasions.

However, I do agree that this books really seems to work from the assumption that the reader is converting because of a romantic relationship. I was 18 years old and single when I had my first (Reform) conversion, and was 24 and still single when I completed my second (Conservative) conversion some years later. I respect that there are a number of people out there who come to want to convert for their own reasons even though the initial catalyst was a romantic relationship, but a growing number of people who convert are indeed single, and always have been. While Ms. Diamant does address that fact that not everyone converts because of a relationship, most of the book really seems biased towards people who are converting for marriage. I just wish there had been more material addressing those of us who are single and who converted for spiritual, not romantic, reasons.

I am currently in the process of conversion, after being married to a Jewish man for many years. I found this book to have a particularly welcoming tone, and it covers the different steps one goes through, privately as well as publicly, in choosing Judaism. Diamant gives good advice on finding a rabbi to work with, courses of study, as well as questions that might be asked by the Bet Din (a council that interviews you and decides whether you are ready to convert.) These questions themselves formed the basis of discussions with my husband, and a lot of journal writing as I thought about the issues she raised.

She gives a good description of the visit to the mikvah which does not diminish the mystery of what goes on spiritually, but does take away any anxiety I might have felt about what going to the mikvah entails.

Diamant also gives some historical perspective on conversion during different time periods, discusses issues regarding family, holidays, and becoming part of the Jewish community.

I read the book through once quickly, and had a good feeling from it. Then, after I met with the rabbi, I found myself re-reading sections pertinent to where I am in the process. I have a feeling I will be turning to the book many times as I go through this important change in my life.

I just finished reading this, as my first step in contemplating conversion. I found the book to be of tremendous value as it not only outlines the conversion process but gives a brief yet thorough overview of this wonderful religion. My wife has begun to read it and as a born-Jew finds it to be helpful as she reclaims her spirituality.

The book is well laid out -- with separate sections discussing the Jewish religion, conversion concerns, the process itself and life after conversion.

I welcomed the book's overriding tone -- that conversion is an integral part of Jewish history and a source of pride and growth for this dynamic religion. Ms. Diamant offers a great first stop on the journey to becoming a Jew.

This book is wonderful for its emotional and highly personal approach. Reading it I was filled with such exitement that I couldn't put it down at all. I really felt this book was written for me as the author expressed a number of questions and doubts that I had myself.The book gives valuable advice about how to handle difficult situations and prepare mentally for conversion so one feels very much supported. Excellent book!