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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Author and life coach Arylo's own life story informs every page of this insightful book. After a 15-year relationship, her fiancé called it quits two hours before the engagement party, causing Arylo, a successful marketing executive, months of devastation and self-doubt. This three-part guide about co-dependent relationships, settling for the wrong man and not knowing what you want begins with Me, showing how crucial it is to get to know yourself first because our relationships are mirrors of ourselves. Arylo delves a little deeper than most by being honest about how many women are in denial about relationships being fueled by the fear of being alone and feeling incomplete. In part two (He), the author guides the reader through a series of visualizations to identify four core qualities the reader wants in her future mate, and part three (We) advises on maintaining authenticity and intimacy in a relationship. This exercise in intention-setting and manifestation will help any woman who wants a lasting partnership that reflects her own true self. (Mar.)
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Review

“A savory, sassy read for every woman seeking more than a fleeting fairy tale.”
— Kimberly Wilson, author of Hip Tranquil Chick

“With wit and wisdom, Arylo teaches us how to find the answers about love and relationships inside ourselves. From here we can accomplish our most heartfelt dreams.”
— Marcia Wieder, founder and CEO of Dream University®
 
“Christine Arylo offers the tips and tools a woman needs to fall in love with her ultimate soul mate: herself. And from that foundation, she can find a ‘he’ and create a healthy and supportive ‘we.’ Every woman should have Choosing ME before WE on her nightstand.”
— Christine Hassler, author of 20 Something, 20 Everything
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 232 pages
  • Publisher: New World Library; No Edition Stated edition (February 1, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 157731641X
  • ISBN-13: 978-1577316411
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.4 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (82 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #29,312 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Christine Arylo is a transformational teacher, internationally recognized speaker, and best-selling author of three books, Madly in Love with ME, Choosing ME before WE, and her newest Reform Your Inner Mean Girl. After earning her MBA and climbing the corporate ladder for fifteen years, working for companies like Gap, PepsiCo, and Kraft, she chose to devote her life to guiding people to create lives based on freedom, self-love and feminine power instead of the relentless pursuit of having to do, be, and have it all.

Christine is the founder of the international self-love movement and Self-Love Day on February 13; the cofounder with Amy Ahlers of the Inner Mean Girl Reform School, the virtual self-love school for women; and the creator of a series of forty-day self-love practices. She also acts as a self-worth advocate and specialist for organizations that serve women and girls, and a spiritual mentor for emerging and established women leaders. Her dedication earned her the affectionate title The Queen of Self-Love.

Christine has been featured on CBS, ABC, FOX, WGN, E!, in the Huffington Post, and on radio shows, spas, conferences, conference rooms, classrooms, and stages around the world, including TEDx. She normally lives in California with her soul partner, Noah, but is known for her love of travel, and spiritual adventure and exploration. And so can often be found leading transformational conversations and sacred retreats around the world.

Go to www.chooseselflove.com to learn more about the self-love movement and receive the free self-love kit. Or visit www.christinearylo.com to learn more about Christine, her retreats, speaking, and mentorship.

Customer Reviews

This book is easy to read.
Rebecca Carter
It really points out to you how you must figure out what you need from life and what makes you happy before getting into a relationship.
Kate
Read this book with an open mind and you will see incredible growth and happiness in your life.
BAH

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

41 of 42 people found the following review helpful By Laura on August 30, 2011
Format: Paperback
I got this book after reading an article the author wrote on Your Tango about why smart women fail at relationships. It was one of the best decisions I've EVER made and I truly feel that it was divine guidance that led me to this book because reading it helped me change my life! Until that point I thought I loved myself but honestly I didn't know how or even what that meant! This book guided me and gave me the tools to finally deal with old demons which had been plaguing my every step without my realizing it.

Thanks to this book, I finally got off autopilot and realized I'd been living and repeating the same pattern of making bad decisions because I believed I was not worthy enough to have something good. I finally saw that the people, especially the men I was attracted to, I'd been attracting into my life were reflecting how I felt about myself and since I didn't love me, they couldn't love me in the way I needed either. Heck I had left me, so why would anybody else stick around?

Thank you Christine for everything! Thank you for being such an inspiration and for helping countless other women like me to finally understand that validation and acceptance must come from within, first and always. I hope to pay forward my blessing and I've told all my girl friends to read your book.
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40 of 42 people found the following review helpful By C. Hartigan on April 27, 2009
Format: Paperback
Choosing ME before WE, was a book I could not put down. It was like getting to know my TRUE self for the first time. I am a middle school counselor and have read many many different self help books and this by far is one of the best.
This book opened my eyes on how I was seeking others for self validations (men particularly), rather then myself. Through the exercise and questions asked through out this book, I reached the "aha" moments that Oprah Winfrey talks about. This book touched my heart and soul. I wished I read this book 10 years ago.
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15 of 15 people found the following review helpful By J. nahas on September 19, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I read this book in 2 sittings. I took notes, I journaled, and I broke through some deep seated limitations.
Thank You Christine, for leading the way!
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13 of 14 people found the following review helpful By Michele Kapp on March 18, 2009
Format: Paperback
I highly recommend this book to anyone in a serious relationship or even for a mother to give to her 20+ year old daughter. I only wish that I would have had this book before I got married! Trust your instinct! Christine Arlyo provides you with some very insightful thoughts about trusting and honoring yourself first! There are many practical tips and questions that you can ask yourself that will empower you to not settle for less!
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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful By Roxie Cohen on May 26, 2010
Format: Paperback
As a woman in my young twenties in a failing relationship I turned to this book for some perspective. I immediately connected with the author's story of an unfulfilled relationship. This book offers women a way to think about themselves and how they are conducting their lives and relationships. Growing up we don't learn that we have to put ourselves first to be happy, but this book offers a gentle but straightforward reminder that it is your life. Love yourself unconditionally and you will be unconditionally loved. I would recommend it to all of my female friends regardless of their age or relationship status.
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12 of 14 people found the following review helpful By New Connexion Journal on June 2, 2010
Format: Paperback
Choosing ME Before WE empowers women from all walks of life to work on the most important relationship there is -- the relationship with themselves. Women have been taught to take care of everyone else -- the kids, the husband, the boss -- and to put ourselves last. We have been taught that taking time for ourselves is selfish. Well, it's time to throw those old thoughts out. Arylo has provided an inspirational guide full of tips and tools to help any woman find her true soul mate: herself. This book is full of real life experiences by the author and her friends. It tells the story of how after a 15-year relationship fell apart just before the engagement party, Arylo went on a self exploration. It was full of dark corners and truths she did not want to confront, but ultimately she found the courage to honestly face who she was and how she had gotten there. And the reward: she developed a loving, trusting, honest relationship with herself. Along her journey she found Noah, her husband, and together they work on continuing to have a committed, fulfilling partnership.

-- Tiffany LaRue, New Connexion Journal
[...]
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By Mary E. Lunetta on March 3, 2012
Format: Paperback
What I appreciated most about this book is that anyone can read it and benefit from it -
Regardless of where you are on the relationship spectrum...
married, committed, single, dating, happy with a partner or miserable with a partner
CMBW gives you the tools you need to check-in with yourself and access the most important relationship you have in your life:
the one with YOU.
Because you can't really love anyone until you really truly love and honor yourself
and know what your heart really desires.

I love that Christine Arylo shares her own personal journey with the readers
of what her life was like before she really loved herself.
she learned she wasn't living her heart's deepest desires
and many years of training and inner exploration gave her the tools that she in turn shares with us, her readers

whether you read the book from cover to cover
or decide to just pick a random page to read for the day
her book will give you the insight and practices that are deeply thought-out, fun, and totally transformative!
Plus, Christine is friggin hilarious ;)

HUGELY thankful for this book!
and so are the many friends and family whom I have gifted it to .. :)

Thank you for this wonderful book, Christine
<3

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