The Chopsticks-Fork Principle: A Memoir and Manual [Paperback]

Cathy Bao Bean (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: December 2, 2002

The Chopsticks-Fork Principle, A Memoir and Manual by Cathy Bao Bean is about how she and her husband, artist Bennett Bean, raised their son to be at least bicultural. The author relates how she, an immigrant from China, figured out how to be herself as well as raise a son whose father did things like paint the lawn.

The Chopsticks-Fork Principle will circulate as a cult classic because of this family's rare combinations and as a ?popular? listing because it deals with ordinary family issues in a practical way. The book is pure, it is heartfelt, it is important. You must know about her Menopausal Theory of Cooking and how to persuade the Canada geese to live somewhere else.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Cathy Bao Bean is a daughter, business manager, aerobics instructor, mother, friend, writer, sister, educational consultant, wife, and activist for the NJ Council for the Humanities. In a previous incarnation, she was a Philosophy teacher, cook, student, carpool driver. She is a member of the Society for Values in Higher Education, Ridge and Valley Conservancy, and NJ Chapter of The World Future Society executive boards. In the process, she has been learning how to make the "foreign" more familiar and the ordinary and extraordinary into each other.

None of it has been painless. All of it has been fun - except the cooking.

Product Details

• Paperback: 305 pages
• Publisher: We Press (December 2, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0972566309
• ISBN-13: 978-0972566308
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 5.9 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,476,114 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

The Chopsticks-Fork Principle, A Memoir and Manual is not the "Tiger Mom" method of child-rearing!
Says Celia Morris, author of Fanny Wright: Rebel in America, "Zany, moving, hilarious, and deep--not infrequently all at once. Cathy Bao Bean gives us a rollicking tour of the Bean method of merging work and play while negotiating cultural and generational divides to create a daily life far richer than its original constituent parts. As Cathy the Chinese Confucian philosophy professor declares war on mice, Bennett the Caucasian artist from mid-America announces "his increasing respect for all sentient beings." As he discovers more of his Buddhist nature, she becomes "more and more like Shiva, 'The Destroyer.'" Bennett designs a kitchen, Cathy notices that he's neglected to include a stove, leaving their son William to rebel against his hippie parents by dressing like his father only on Halloween. Cathy Bao Bean has written a tart, feisty, whimsical, and penetrating saga of the family that invented the Chopsticks-Fork Principle and then proceeded to live by it.

The book is a memoir. In the author's words, "In 1959, when I was a Junior and the only Asian in Teaneck High, NJ, I learned about Hybrid Vigor in Biology class. The idea was that when two different strains of corn were crossed, the result was greater than was normal for either parent type. In 1974, when I was a new mother in the maternity ward, I wondered if the same principle couldn't be deliberately applied to cultures. Physically we had the makings for such an experiment. Our newly born son was half Asian, half Caucasian. Intellectually, I formulated his prospects from the wealth of his dual heritage, translating his ancestors' stories into a future neither side could have imagined, yet both had anticipated to some degree. Practically, I worried just how much difference it would make that he wasn't an ear of corn." The book is also a manual for anyone who steps outside the home, becomes at least bicultural and wants to, please, have fun doing it!
The Chopsticks-Fork Principle is a story about reconciling the expectations of extended families and society at large, and how to raise a child in a respectful context while also choosing the "path less traveled." Race, class, and gender issues are imbedded seamlessly within the narrative. Through Bao Bean's stories, we experience what it's like to be a "feminist" before being an "Asian-American," a doctoral candidate before realizing one speaks Chinglish. In doing so, the reader finds not angst, but wisdom and a lot of good cheer.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars WISE, WITTY, WONDERFUL, WELL WRITTEN...BUY IMMEDIATELY, December 29, 2002

By 

Doug Anderson (Palm Beach, Florida USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Chopsticks-Fork Principle: A Memoir and Manual (Paperback)

As a 60 year old who was sent to summer camp when I was 4 years old, went to public school in New York City until high school and then wound up commuting to Columbia College on the #4 bus because my parents considered me too young to live away from home; as the husband of an art collector who has never been encumbered by anyone's opinion of right or wrong; as a parent, as a son......it was pure delight to read this book.

Yes, we've known Bennett Bean for 20 years. We have collected his work, commissioned him to make a multi-media painting for our home and we have been working with him for four years on a carpet project......we understand and celebrate his sense of joy and adventure in making art.......and we did know his wife, Cathy, but not the way we know her now.

Cathy Bao Bean writes with style, grace, wit, relevance. I have sent her book to our children to read so they can see down the road of child-rearing. I have sent her book to friends my age so the see that they are not alone in their feelings.

This book confirms the notion that gems exist outside the normal publishing distribution channels......and how major businesses miss great opportunities every day.

WARNING, CAUTION: This book may cause you a problem. You will want to read it very quickly.....please do not do this. Savor it, read it very slowly.

DOUG ANDERSON

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The Chopsticks/Fork Principle, December 24, 2002

By A Customer

This review is from: The Chopsticks-Fork Principle: A Memoir and Manual (Paperback)

Not a traditional memoir, The Chopsticks/Fork Principle is more of a love-letter to the author?s family, friends and to life in general. But it is never sentimental or maudlin. Ms. Bean has taken her Eastern heritage and blended it (not without some lumps and bumps) with her Western lifestyle, to create something greater than the sum of its parts. Her delight in what her life has brought her will sweep the reader into a special world that is, indeed, a very nice place to visit. Her wry, dry and sly humor, her sharp wit, her genuine wisdom and her slightly off-center philosophy of life and living, make this a rare treat - a truly charming book.
Cathy Bao Bean deliberately chooses to see the best side of people and, whenever possible, events. To do this, she has allowed time to mellow hurts and humor to cushion memories.
As someone who grew up in New York at about the same time as the author, I confess to being unaware of the discrimination against Chinese Americans, especially following World War II when many Chinese were mistaken for Japanese. Ms. Bean tells her stories with humor and subtlety, which gives them a resonance they might not have had in less skillful, or kindly, hands.
One of the author?s childhood stories really surprised me. At about the age of ten, her parents sent her to summer camp. ... Her tales of camp were a trip down memory lane for me, and a reminder of how shared experiences - especially good ones - create bonds between people, no matter what their origins or differences.
As a ?manual,? The Chopsticks/Fork Principle has much to teach about relationships with people, nature and community.
If you are looking for a meaningful gift for Valentine?s Day or Mother?s Day, this is a good one!

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Mindful amalgamation, December 23, 2002

By 

nancy only (Eureka, CA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Chopsticks-Fork Principle: A Memoir and Manual (Paperback)

I have already read @ 85 words, and can't put it down for more than a few minutes at a time. It's everything the jacket promises and and more. As a parent I love her insights about parenting. As a daughter, I love her insights into her heritage. And I have already laughed out loud more than once.