Customer Reviews

Christian Men Who Hate Women

5 star:		(16)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

This is a great book!! After you're done reading this, please read "Verbally Abusive Relationships - How to recognize them and how to respond" by Patricia Evans. This is a secular book but it is great!!! I see myself and my husband throughout these books and these books give you courage to make changes - but you need a good therapist that is well versed in this area to help you. If after your therapy and reading you are seriously considering divorce, you will need to feel a lot of God's Grace and to help you realize that He has plenty for you, read: "Breaking and Mending - Divorce and God's Grace" by Mary Lou Redding. To the Pastors, Elders, Home Group Leaders and especially the regular parishoners - don't judge us lest you be judged. Read these books before you shake your fingers at us, whisper behind our backs, ask us to leave your church, tell us we're not being spiritual enough, and we aren't spending time in the Word. Instead offer us your support, love, and compassion. Believe us that we have considered all our options, that we have given it a "fair chance" and we are taking our children into consideration. While some of us may not be able to break the generations of divorce, we can break the generations of abuse. We have spent many nights crying and praying over our decision but only after spending YEARS on our knees praying for a miracle in our marriage,going to counselor after counselor. Meanwhile, our husbands take no responsibility, refuse to do any work or do minimal counseling. I am starting to believe that what God wants for me and my children is a life of peace and joy and we can't do that when we're living a life of hell. Abuse is abuse whether it's physical or verbal. P.S. If you are a marriage counselor, please be loving & humble enough to admit when you have reached your knowledge and refer wives like us to those that are trained in this area - even if you suspect it!

I was a Type I kind of misogynist, very subtle but controlling husband, and I was horrified to realize I had this issue, lucky for my wife someone got her this book because of course, I was always "right" in our "christian couseling" and someone finally saw my lack of feelings, and all that junk and fingered me out, and when i realized what was going on, this subtle thing, I went to PROFESSIONAL counseling for quite a while and had to really "come out" of my shell and be a REAL man, this book was the begining, and a super life saver, that was 8 years into my marriage, now, 11 years later, on my 19th year of marriage I am the true man my wife always dreamed of an I like myself better too. I would say in this sad day where fathers are wimps and mohters are controlling (for good reason) that there is an epidemic and will continue to be an epidemic of young men who have no idea what real manhood is about and this book is before it's time, so sad to see, but if you search, the truth is out there, you gotta just really want it, this book provides some amazing truth, should be re-printed a zillion times for people.

I can't say enough good things about this book. I bet I have read it ten times and I'm still reeling from the insightfulness of it. If you are married to a man--or in the process of separation or divorce from one--who thinks women are sex objects, baby machines, and irrational ditzes, given to men by God to slave for the men and "submit" to their abuse, AND HE CLAIMS TO BE A CHRISTIAN, get this book!!!

This book has a wealth of stories about real couples with whom Dr. Rinck has interacted, that you will really be able to relate to if you are married to a cold, emotionless (except for lust and rage) "Christian" male chauvinist. Dr. Rinck also does a good job of separating the controversies about biblical interpretation on male and female roles from the grim reality of domestic abuse among Christians, on which everyone should be able to agree.

When I read this book, it gave me the strength to continue with my divorce and not go back to a nightmarish marriage. I was given enough insight to see through my husband's fog machine of religious verbiage about "forgiving" and "starting over in Christ" for the manipulation that it was. And all of the nights of crying into my pillow, wondering whether I was losing my mind and feeling guilty because my "loving Christian" husband kept viciously turning on me for no reason, suddenly made sense.

What can I say? I was blind, but now I see. And I have this author to thank for it.

Dr. Rinck has put together a wonderful book to help as a stepping stone for women who have been, or are currently caught in an abusive misogynist relationship.

Dr. Rinck's book, not only raises awareness, but educates and defines the misogynist relationship. For many women who marry religous men, feeling they will have a long lasting and loving marital relationship, only to later find their hopes, dreams and futures spinning in a downward nightmare, this book will be invaluable to them.

I applaud Zondervan Publishing Company for printing Dr. Rinck's book and reaching religous communities, who may have spurn the topic, had it been published by other secular companies. The Christian community has much to be grateful to Zondervan for providing material to enrich and guide the lives of many people.

Thank you both for the book.

Deborah Skousen

This book is absolutely a must read for any person in a leadership position in a Church. More people in the Church need to be aware of this pattern of abuse, and provide a safe harbor for women seeking help. I was not only terrified of my husband, I was judged and criticized by the very people that should have helped me. I had no voice to speak up. This book encouraged me to find my voice and make a better life for myself. I have shared this book with others and have seen the powerful difference it has made in their lives, both men and women. This is not about men-bashing or blaming men. It is about both men and women breaking the cycle of blame and shame. It is about being treated with dignity and respect. Thank you Dr. Rinck for being the voice of the abused and providing a tool for recovery.

Roberta Flack once did a signature song that is surely to come to mind as soon as the reader picks up this book and finds many true stories spread among its pages. Not epic, but perhaps epidemic, it causes one to question if there should not be "self help and gripe" groups in every church and community to help those men, women and children cope with the harm that misogyny does, and how if manifests itself in people's lives. The authors should consider franchising the help groups since they surely would have the impact that the AAA form has had in the area of alcohol, and the conduct that arises from both personal and public acceptance of misogyny reaches far into most communities with no one to whom victims can turn. Unfortunatey, the emotional harm to self esteem and productivity that misogynistic behavior produces is not so soft, but has hard ramifications in society that last, often for lifetimes. This attempt to properly put misogynistic behavior and people in perspective is a must read for anyone experiencing it, and a should read for those who seek to understand what it is, and how it manifests itself in human relations. Not limited to spousal relations or to one gender alone, (since reverse discrimination can and does operate similarly for some men by women), it is a good review of tactics used by people haters who happen to fall into a narrow category of character - in this case, women.

A Pastor at my church suggested I glean from this book .... I felt like I was reading a script of my life! This helped undo a lot of the confusion and settle so many of the questions that I had about my marriage. It also helped me know that although I'm not perfect, I was not the root cause of his problems as he so fanatically claims. This helped strengthen my self esteem tremendously.

To help me maintain balance, I also learned to recognize these abusive patterns and how to help dis-arm them.

This is not a book to bash men or husbands, it is a book to help wives gain their sanity and selfworth. Thank you Dr. Rinck!

I have not finished reading "Christian Men Who Hate Women" by Dr. Margaret J. Rinck, as it's not as easy to read as "Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them" by Susan Froward, but it is a great addition it. It breaks down the characteristics of the misogynist to different levels. So, while you don't see all of the listed characteristics in the person you are trying to understand, you can still identify whether or not they are a misogynist on some level.

On EASE OF READING, I would rate this book 3/5.
Somehow it doesn't flow smoothly enough for me. Perhaps it uses too many clinical terms, I'm not sure.

On CONTENT, I would rate it a 5/5.
GOOD INFORMATION.

I cannot describe to you what pinpoint accuracy Dr. Rinck has employed in describing my life, particularly appendix E, What is Misogyny? Many think this could not possible exist in the Body of Christ and, more importantly, that the church will be the oasis it should be. This book will help you know you are not crazy. While I am still wrestling with whether or not it's "ok" for me to want out of my marriage as a Christian, mother of a young daughter, and just recently part-time employed, this book has helped me gain a more balanced perspective and begin to make more accurate decisions. Also see "Restoring the Wounded Woman" by Melinda Fish.

I bought this book because of an issue I was going through (not with my sweet husband!)...and I was so surprised at the frank honesty and eye opening accounts given in this slim paperback novel.
As I read, I could see certain men playing out in my mind, and understanding now, their cruel behavior...they HATE women. Sigh.
this book should be a must read by anyone who offers counselling services (pastors, lay pastors, deacons, etc). Additionally, it would be a good elective read for young people in highschool/college.
I am better for having read it....