Customer Reviews

Cobra

5 star:		(43)
4 star:		(23)
3 star:		(17)
2 star:		(7)
1 star:		(21)

 

 

This is a classic Sylvester Stallone action movie. It's one of the best he ever made. Cobra was mostly known for the number of people killed during the movie. It far exceeded any previous record for an action movie...bordering on the comical. Some of the things you'll remember... The match he keeps in his mouth. His awesome gun. His Mercury which is painfully destroyed during the movie. And the most memorable moment is when he meets up with "Night Slasher" (Brian Thompson) at the end and gets an earful about the judicial system. "They'll say I'm insane. Won't they...PIG!?" If ever there was a classic piece of film it's this encounter. Me and my friends still joke today about how spittle and sweat comes from his mouth when he says, "PIG!". It's hilarious. That alone is worth owning this movie. In all, it's typical of 80's action films. Sylvester's films always seem to have a fair amount of cheese in them. It's a given. At the same time tho, they don't make films like this anymore. The days of the action hero seem over, but they can be relived with movies like Cobra.

A friend of mine once stated that Cobra was "one of the greatest works of art ever committed to celluloid". He's dead now, so I feel okay saying that his comment was patently absurd. Cobra is, in fact, the greatest achievement in human history. More to the point, watching Cobra is like peering into the mind of God.
Following all the movie's plot twists and turns is certainly a test of mental acuity, but under the delicate helmsmanship of director George Cosmatos, even a dullard can expect 87 minutes of uninterrrupted rapture. Based on Paula Gosling's criminally Nobel-overlooked novel "Fair Game", Cobra explores the fragile struggle between civilized society's need for a humane justice system versus its innate lust for exacting revenge. In an increasingly violent, hostile, and lonely world, where apocalyptic serial-killing cults are allowed to infiltrate our power structures (in this case, the police force), slaughter our pop icons in parking garages (Peter Cetera), and clink their axes together in abandoned warehouses, where do we draw the line between cruelty and justice? Where Cosmatos stands on this issue is purely speculative, as he tackles the films denouement with characteristic subtlety and restraint: Cobra impales the maniacal cult leader on a hook conveyor to be immolated in a roaring smelting furnace. It's an ending that will no doubt continue to inspire spirited discourse amongst filmgoers and ethicists for decades to come.
At the center of all this wondrous mayhem is Sylvester Stallone as the hard-boiled "zombie squad" toiler Marion "Cobra" Cobretti. And, surprise surprise!, he is once again at the top of his craft. Here he revolutionizes thespianism with a brilliant new school of character development whereby the actor bypasses the diverse landscape of emotions one would expect from his/her character and instead tenaciously embraces a look of fatigue, angst, and confusion throughout the film's entirety. It's a talent only the likes of Burt Reynolds and a young Dolph Lundgren could ever hope to master.
Need romance? Cobra has it in spades. The chemistry between Stallone and damsel-in-distress Brigitte Nielsen recalls classic Tracy-Hepburn and DeVito-Perlman. This is never more evident than in the infamous diner scene, in which Nielsen squirts a viscous lagoon of ketchup on her french fries before an exasperated Cobretti. This stunning use of condiments only hints at the unbearably thick sexual tension between the protagonists and always lights a fire in my shorts.
The only sad note in this film : wardrobe director Tom Bronson's mind-boggling decision to saddle Cobra's partner Gonzalez (played by an unbelievably adequate Reni Santoni) with a tweed cap throughout most of the action. Yes, the dapper fez lends some street-cred and authenticity to the role, but it isn't until a shootout near the end of the film that the heaven that is this man's gossamer follicles are exposed! Shame on you, Mr. Bronson. Anything less than the unadulterated glory that is Mr. Santoni's vibrant plumage is a crime in my book!!!
Aspiring filmmakers take heed: commit "Cobra" to memory...or take up bricklaying.

This movie is so underrated! I can't get enough of Sly with those tinted glasses and that toothpick. The action is spectacular and there are some good social comments about society too that really make you think. I love the car he drives and that stubble drives me wild! I have'nt been this hot and bothered since "Party at Kitty and Studs". Sometimes, me and my girlfriends will rent this and a Stephen Segal movie and just squeal the night away.

Why do I do this to myself? Stay up late at night and watch horrible action movies on HBO, that is. It seems like each one gets worse than the last. But "Cobra" is about as low as they can go.

Stallone demonstrates quite admirably why action movie stars should not write their own screenplays. From the "maverick in the police department" to the "female lead who falls in love with a guy who continually and recklessly endangers her life" to the "treacherous partner cop-gone-bad" to the "one man vs. an army" of the climactic shootout, the plot might interest a sleeping zombie. Maybe that's his target audience, as the brutal senselessness of the movie could only escape the undead. Although even zombies will get a little nauseated at the retro-80s soundtrack.

Maybe I've been spoiled by "The Matrix" -- no, scratch that, even the memory of "Rambo" and "Rocky" was enough to ruin this film. I think I'm going to go into my room and cry now.

The first 10 minutes of this movie present a pretty entertaining introduction to the title character, Marion "the Cobra" Cobretti. The reflecto sunglasses, the laser scoped gun, the cobra insignia on the gun's handle, the match dangling from his pouty lips (I thought that went out in the 50's?). After those first 10 minutes, however, I had a hard time maintaining my concentration on this movie.

In 1985, Stallone and Schwarzenegger went mano a mano with two war superhero movies, "Rambo" and "Commando," two of my all time favorites for that genre. In 1986, I was hyped for the round two with "Cobra" and "Raw Deal" fighting it out for the detective superhero award. Well, both movies rank among my all time least favorites for ol' Hanz and Franz. How can a woman as good looking as Brigette Nielsen be such a bore playing a model? And why does Stallone play the Cobra like Rocky Balboa with a speech impediment? (I know that is redundant). I guess he thinks the shy-guy routine will somehow allow this 2 dimensional character to cast an actual shadow. We'll never know. You'll be best off skipping this one at the rental outlet.

Oh man,

I'd have to humbly say the only advantage to enjoying this movie is being a twelve year old seeing it for the first time. But that would be a twelve year old of 1986 actually experiencing it in the movies. Of which the twelve year olds today would probably need a lot more "eye-candy" to keep them amused. But boy, is this movie rib-crushingly hilarious to the grown up of right now.

Catch me back in '86,'87 as a kid watching this movie with my jaws agape and you'd never believe I'd have grown up to laugh so hard at every TNT "Movies For Guys. . ." showing. This is such a fun "Dude" movie. It's so ridiculous and ubelievable - not to mention 80's cheese - you can't help but watch it every time it's on.

But you have to give Sly just a wee bit of credit. Pulling off that "Ode to Eastwood" thing was probably such a novel idea at the pitch meeting, it truly is a shame we never saw more of the omnipotent, invincible and insatiably charming Marion Cobretti again.

Yeah.

But anyway. . .so what it's dumb. So what it lacks the believability of Rambo III. And so what if you need plot, character development, consistency and story! This is definitely the movie for you if you think wrestling is real.

And two stars? Hey, man. . .I had to give it something. One star just wouldn't be fair for the accountability of nostalgia.

Godfather? Definitely not. But hey, neither was The Toxic Avenger. And I dare you to find a living soul that's actually seen The Toxic Avenger and not LOVED it!

So there it is. Two stars for the timeless COBRA. One 'cause it needed one for the review and the other 'cause I was twelve.

Take care.

A double sided disk, with basic menus a few old previews with no extra features. For collectors only.

Both movies are roughneck, about tough cops and crazy criminals.
somewhat barabaric, jokes that dont really cut it, action thats mostly just violent for the sake of being violent. Not exactly an adrenaline rush, more like a crash and burn mismatch with comic relief that just makes you scratch your head and stare at the ceiling.

Cobra is cool, Stallone is great at being the anti-hero or good guy with an edge but this type of stuff is pretty worn out ever since lethal weapon and the days of die hard. Its definetly old school and if your a fan of that then Cobra is a must have and a major milestone for Stallone.
If you like in your face action, thriling chase scenes and murder victims
this is where its at. 80s action was all about tough guys and hot chicks.
Well that is if you cant Bridgeete Neilson. This is definetly a gun glory.
Perhaps this movie is responsible for the cliched Act 3 of a horror or action movie wherein the good guy chases the bad guy into a steel mill and they slug it out. Classic.

Tango n Cash on the other hand is like a freebie thats tacked on, its somewhat interesting seeing Kurt Russel and Stallone team up but there 1 time romp is nothing more than a hayride over a hill. Its full antics and
misfortune. They try to play off each other but its obvious there a mismatch of acting styles. I feel a little bit dumber having watched it.
I think they tried to mimic the success of Lethal Weapon but failed. How can you have Stallone playing a ritzy and clever wallstreet tycoon that is also the number 1 cop in his city? Hes too clean cut and straight forward, and alot unlike Stallone other characters whove had shady pasts.
Its almost like Sacralidge when Tango says "Rambo sucks" compared to what may I ask? If this were a western it would be Butch Cassidy and the Sundance kid, but worse, its just an awful team up. Oh and it has a very young Teri Hatcher as Stallone's sister. Imagine that. Stallone without the girl this time. Silly, stupid and uneventful. Avoid it.

Its this cheap for a reason,its old, everyones already seen it,some people own it,its probably available for free at the library, and theyve been shown on tv over a dozen times in the past 10 years. But go rent or borrow a copy of Cobra, watch it once if u havent already, and prepare for the next big release from Stallone, "the Expendables" 2010.

When people watch the recent "action" movies that have been released in theaters, they definitely are not getting what film-goers got out of action movies in the 80's. What makes action movies, "Action Movies", is the obvious lack of story, poor acting, and endless amounts of cheese. Cobra has it all...and much, much more! From the group of psychos that are bent on creating "The Way of the New World" to Marion Cobretti, Stallone, and his Zombie Squad, Cobra never lets you forget that it is a terrible movie, which means it is awesome. The Zombie Squad is supposed to be the misfit cops who do the jobs the "real" cops won't do. Stallone heads this rag tag crew, which involves only Poppy from Seinfeld fame, against the dirtiest man alive, who leads...the group of men and women who kill hot chicks. Are you following me? No? Good. Some highlights, the soundtrack...trust me, pure cheese, and the give and take between Cobretti and the Lieutenant who disagrees with Cobra's methods, riveting stuff. The fight at the end between Cobretti and the whole Attractive-Girl Slaughtering Gang deserves an award. I am not sure what award, maybe a bucket of KFC? Any way, this movie is atrocious...so buy it to annoy your friends or your girlfriend.

I first saw this movie when I was about 5. I've grwon up watching violent movies and this is one of my favorites from my earliest memories.

Cobra is an all time favourite of mine, I can't believe the bad reviews. This film I think is well made, it's exciting. I love this film.

I think Sly and Brigette Nielsen had wonderful chemisty together, there intrieging to watch. Brigette is wonderful to watch, a fine actress. Slyvester is cool as usual. I everything about this film, the music, the story, the actors. Brian Thompson is a favourite of mine. He plays the psycho well, especially the attack on Ingrid in the hospital.

So if you haven't seen this film, please don't believe the negitive reviews, this film is a classic in my opinion.