Customer Reviews

Codependent... What a Bore and Other Clinical Observations: Stop Struggling Under Pseudo-Psychology And Consider Suing The Idiots Mistreating You

5 star:		(1)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I bought this book to see how it alligned with my own current conclusions of CoDA and the field of co-dependancy.
I found it to be mostly concise in it's observations.
I would hope that the next printing be proof-read better (for spelling) and that the editing be a little more objective as any partisan/political statements detract from the actual points he is making at the time (even though I may agree with those politics and party, they are unnecessary for this work). However, the emotional distractions usually only last a couple of paragraphs at a time and I implore the reader to keep with the subject at hand since he has good points to impart to the objective mind. Likewise, let the historical accepted rhetoric which is only partially accurate fall to the wayside. Ignore the sprawls and read it all the way through!

To others maligning the 12 step code though, it should be noted that CoDA and Al-anon have little in common except the appearance of 12 steps. In my researching the actual CoDA meetings, it has been my current experience that while they lure you in with a "12 step helping-others" promotional, they are in fact dominated by beginning "CBT" students using all the tools that Rick writes about and not the actual 12 step literature collecting dust in the corner of the meetings. In every meeting I have witnessed the "non-CoDA/non-approved" books by Beattie are used as their 'bible' at hand which we jokingly call the 'mid-way-carney-game' in our house. (I bet they could guess our weight in three tries too.)It is painfully obvious that these meeting 'leaders' have a different agenda and it falls right in line with Goodners' Shadow Priests.

While I've read the Bufe; Peele; Ellis books I see they make some vital mistakes due to their own prejudice to anything but themself.
But with objective filters, one can get a good sense of balance from Bufe and Peele. IMO: Ellis is an emotional twit, but an excellent case study. But do not let Goodners' minor support of their work denegrate from his observations.

I just hope that I can get the AODA counselors I know to read it!

I have not read this book but I just recently began going to Alanon and am glad I stumbled upon this. It makes me realize that I need to always be aware of the people around me. That just because they are in Alanon does not mean they are good people. So far the people Ive met seem very good natured but I will stay alert for warning signs and not get too close. I will take what helps me and leave what does not. If anyone ever makes me uncomfortable then I will stay away from them. I will trust my instincts while attending Alanon. Really any where you go in this world no matter how "good and pure" the people and program may seem there is always going to be bad mixed in. That is why I like that the twelve step programs say to take what you can use and leave the rest. I will not stop attending Alanon because of this book, but I will be more aware.

This book is truely funny and in a fun way true. I'm taking everything I read in this book to heart. I'm just sick that I have been played for a fool for so long by a codependant therapist. Well that is over now! Thank you Rick you saved my life.

...in silliness!

Mr. Goodner probably has some good points to make -- I doubt anything Oprah pushes is really good -- but to spend, what, five pages going on about Plato's Cave allegory is pedantic in the extreme: we get the point, let's move on....

Now, I said that the author "probably" has some good points in his book because I haven't read it -- just browsing the few scanned pages turned me off (the two-star rating reflects those few pages scanned in). I'm no codependency cult fan; I just wanted to hear this side of the matter, but the style of writing was so pedantic and smug as to have made me think that reading this would be a real bore, too!

Hopefully the tone of the writing will be amended -- and the pedanticism excised -- in a future edition. Again, there are probably good points here against codependent psycho-babble (I myself don't know enough either way right now)...just wish they were made more intelligently and, even, more humanely.