Top critical review
20 people found this helpful
Helpful, hopeful - but sad - must use caution!
on July 5, 2001
A therapist gave me this book, a revised one that my ex is also reading, I'm told. I was scared to death when I first read the last chapter "coda" then went through the book chapter by chapter. The underlying tone: "GIVE UP WHATEVER YOUR THINK YOU INVESTED" -- "IT DOESN"T MATTER NOW." "IT'S OVER." That part, even for those who realize that maybe we could have done something better to the ending, makes it a tough read, for its finality of an ending and a relationship. Reading this, there is "NO" turning back and, that hurts. The part, however, on the "Rituals of Parting" are exactly what couples should do to close the inevitable. In fact, if we had done this chapter, we may still feel better about ourselves, our loving this partner and develop the gifts that all relationship's bring. Unfortunately, those without the courage to follow the book will find it to be a sad, incomplete book that won't made things better in "moving on. It is a one-sided view of only saying "It's over." For that, I am sad for all who hurt. Do the "Ritual" as I wish I could.