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Coming Together, Coming Apart: A Memoir of Heartbreak and Promise in Israel

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In this volume Daniel Gordis writes of his life in Israel from when he family moved from Los Angeles to Jerusalem.
It covers the events of the Terror War (2000-2005), after Barak's offer of Gaza, half of Jerusalem and almost the entire West Bank to the Arabs was met by a bloody war of terror against Israel's population, launched by mass murderer Yassir Arafat.
He describes the wave of terror attacks, which engulfed Israel during this period, in which thousands of Israeli men, women and children were butchered in a war by Hamas, Islamic Jihad, the Al Aqsa Martyrs Brigades the Popular Resistance Committees and the PFLP, to get the Jews out of the Land of Israel by killing them.
The experience of parents not knowing if that morning when their children left the house to go to school it would be the last time that they ever saw them.
Gordis reminds us that the Jews have no place to go other than Israel, and that the war is not about land but about the existence of the Jews in Israel.As the author writes "We are not leaving. Where could we possibly go? Does Europe want us back? It didn't work very well the last time we where there.
He describes the international furor over the security fence that enemies of Israel and her people the world over refer to as the 'Apartheid Wall', which has saved thousands of lives in Israel, which is probably why much of the world wants it taken down, so that terrorists can get into Israel to murder Jews.
The trial by the International Court of Justice' at the Hague, is not about the fence but about the existence of the Jews in Israel.
Arab inconvenience is treated as more important than Jewish lives.
The author describes the internal conflicts through the eyes of his family, and Israel, including about the forced removal of the Jewish population of Gaza in 2005.
I don't agree with the author's conclusions that there was no alternative.
I also disagree with the author that the idea of transfer of the hostile Arab population out of the Land of Israel is in any way more horrific than the expulsion and forced removals of Jews from parts of the Land (eventually all of the Land, accompanied by a Second Holocaust?)
The Gaza disengagement led directly to the Israel-Hezbollah War of 1996, and the destruction of the town of Sderot. Hamas attacking Israel with thousands of Kassam rockets in the last few years.
As Gordis' son Micha observes 'And right that every time Israel does something after they attack us, the world thinks Israel was wrong?'.
We get an overwhelming illustration of a Nation struggling to survive in a world in which millions would rather it did not exist.
The book affirms the extraordinary spirit of the people of Israel,
the most humane, giving, life-affirming people on the planet--
whatever sick propaganda you might have read to the contrary.

Daniel Gordis' writing is honest and moving, the key to any successful memoir. In the beginning of the memoir Gordis acknowledges the question that many parents ask him, "How could you do this to your kids? How could you take them from the safety of suburban Los Angles to Israel?" The answer to that question comes through in every word that he writes. It is an answer filled with meaning and purpose, history and peoplehood, faith and dedication. But I encourage the reader to discover the answer for his or herself.

Gordis, himself, defies many of the labels that plague Israel. He seems to be one of the few remaining people who can talk about Israel with nuance and a recognition of the truths that lie in the arguments of those on the left and those on the right. This is evidenced in his writings about the disengagement from Gaza in the summer of 2005. Mirroring the split opinions in his family (and his own internal conflicts) he tied both orange (signifying opposition to the disengagement) and blue and white (signifying support for the disengagement) ribbons to his car. This earned him many complaints from his family and an easier time parking at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem (you'll have to read to understand).

One of the things that makes this book a jewel is Gordis' constant acknowledgment and appreciation for where he is. Despite the trauma and difficulties of living through exploding busses and cafes while raising a family, he never loses an appreciation or forgets the ideals and history that led him and his family to make a life in Israel.

Easily a must read for those living outside of Israel, especially given the recent violence, it is perhaps an even more important read for those living inside of Israel. After reading this book one imagines that if there were more people in Israel like Gordis the country just might get through all its troubles.

This book is a must read for anyone wanting to get a better understanding of what it really means to love your country from a superb writer.

Reading this book was like putting myself in Israel. Mr. Gordis has the ability to present very controversial topics and display a fairness to both sides of an issue. One has no doubt that this author has a deeply rooted love for his country.

By including beautiful passages about his three children and wife, one can't help but feel connected to each of them. I don't remember ever being so moved,while reading a book, as when Mr. Gordis shared his very private moments of seeing his military bound daughter sleeping in her bed on her last night home, cuddling her very old bear "Curious".

Learn about Israel, a beautiful country. Understand in greater depth the turmoil and difficult decisions made by the people who have made their home in this very small piece of land.

I have read all of Daniel Gordis' books. Each one is extremely meaningful and thought provoking. The latest one, Coming Together, Coming Apart is a must read for anyone who cares about Israel,anyone who cares about humanity anyone who is a parent, or anyone who is a child. Very few books, that I will openly laugh, cry and make you think. It covers the period of two years, ending in October 2005 and is essentially the memoirs of Gordis, who emigrated to Israel from Los Angeles with his children. Especially in light of the current events, it helps one understand the day to day life that Israelies face, the challenges they face, and their love of life and their hope. Once you pick the book up, it is difficult to put it down. I cannot recommend it enough.

It is easy to lose perspective regarding the importance of Israel in light of so many disheartening recent events in Israel. Yet Mr. Gordis's portrayal of Israeli society adds a much necessary positive spin to (as Gordis reffers to Israel) "the enterprise".

Understanding Israel does not only mean eating falafels in Tel Aviv and swimming in the Dead Sea - rather, it's the understanding that the State of Israel is the most important historical development of the Jewish people in 2000 years, and that we can (and will) never lose it.

Kol Ha'Kavod, Mr. Gordis, for this excelent book.

This is truly one from the heart! A soulful chronicle. Daniel Gordis beautifully captures what so many of us intuit from afar about life in Israel. He grapples with the ethical and moral dilemmas that ordinary Israelis face at the same time that they struggle with existential issues of Jewish permanence in the Middle East, a point that is sadly lost on so many of Israel's judges and jurors around the world.



Gordis describes what it's been like to be a father of three children during the five or so years of the second Intifada, living in Jerusalem amidst the horrors of what has come to be known in Israel as the Terror War of 2000-2005. How he is at a loss for words when his ten-year-old son asks him questions for which there are no answers. We feel his impotence at being unable to assure his son that he is safe, because the painful truth is that in Jerusalem of those years no such assurance could be given.



Gordis shows us the quiet dignity of children who should never have to be exposed to such horrors, but who know in their bones who they are and that this is their only home.

This is a book about identity, about belonging, and about doing what it takes to make sure that the miraculous experiment of recreating an ancient civilization is done with respect, integrity and a healthy awe for the magnitude of the enterprise.



Daniel Gordis and his family came to Jerusalem in 1998 while he was on sabbatical. The family decided to stay, animated by the belief that they would be among the first generation of modern Israelis to bring up their children in a time of peace. Those dreams were shattered when the Oslo Accords came tumbling down in the fall of 2000, but stay they did.



It takes great courage to remain in the bull's eye of the battlefield, which is what the streets of Jerusalem became. But to shoulder the burden of knowing one's children are in harm's way is more than most of us could fathom. Yet the Gordises remained steadfast, and showed that they had the same mettle as the rest of the unsung heroes of Israeli society who braved those years with an unimaginable fortitude.



Throughout it all, we see a man who brings his passion for Judaism; it's culture, history, people and religion to all of his undertakings. Daniel Gordis is a humanist of the first order, a broadminded thinker who raises as many questions as he answers. His liberal American background comes into conflict with the harsh realities of the Middle East, but he does not sacrifice his values in the maelstrom of terror. Rather, Gordis takes each situation on its own terms and merits, arguing eloquently for and against the disengagement from Gaza, always with an eye to what is best for the soul of the Jewish people. He is unafraid to make hard choices and understands that to keep all the land of historic Israel might mean losing the very essence of what the enterprise of Zionism is all about.



This book is a compelling first person account of one family's gratitude for being able to participate in the rebuilding of a new Jewish society, reveling in the renewal of the ancient tongue of Hebrew. Gordis takes nothing for granted and understands the gift and miracle of everyday life in modern Israel.

This book brought tears of joy and sadness to me. It presents the nobility of the struggle that is Israel, with all its inherent sacrifices and rewards; tragedies and miracles; battles and triumphs. Israel and the Jewish people as a whole are blessed to have such a spokesperson for Zion as Daniel Gordis!



[...]

I truly loved this book. My husband and I have considered making Aliyah with our children on many occasions. This book provided a realistic and honest prespective on the challenges of undertaking such an endeavor.

"Coming Together, Coming Apart" is a must-read for Jews both inside and outside of Israel. An American family who makes the big decision to take their commitment to the ultimate level by making Aliyah finds their pre-conceived notions, idealistic concepts and religious faith tested by terror in their own backyard. How they cope with fear, how they learn to live with the uncomfortable ambiguity that is life in Israel, how their own internal family dynamics are strained and strengthened is a story that should not be missed.

As an American Jew from Los Angeles planning Aliyah myself, this book has helped me to see not only how another American family from L.A. has dealt with the challenges of both war and peace, but has confirmed my belief that life in Israel isn't perfect, but it is REAL, and do-able for those of us who, like our forefather Jacob, are willing to wrestle through the dark night of our soulds with our personal proverbial "Angels" and not release them until we receive the blessing for which we have struggled and fought. Although we may receive a unhealable wound we who prevail recieve a new name and a heritage uniquely ours. "Coming Together, Coming Apart" illustrates that Divine wrestling match and shows us what that heritage looks and feels like when the dawn finally breaks.

Thanks to Daniel Gordis for this well-written, passionate labor of love!

I read this book on the airplane from the US to Israel during the summer of 2006. It helped to prepare me for the attitudes which I found while in Israel.