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87 Reviews
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215 of 220 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The best married couples' communication book I've read!
Like most people, my wife and I were never taught how to communicate effectively with each other. Ultimately, we ended up in marital therapy to try to save our marraige. We took turns reading the chapters of this short book to each other, then discussing what we had learned and how to put it to use. We learned more in a few nights than either of our therapists taught us,...
Published on December 3, 1997 by arielgp@ix.netcom.com

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123 of 133 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Decent book but....
but I found myself rolling my eyes at some of the analogies (such as describing why we fight as being because our 'self esteem bank account' is low and we want to make a deposit in it by arguing with a loved one). I did find some helpful hints about ways to diffuse an argument, but I did feel like most of the time the author wants you to 'give in' when arguing because he...
Published on August 11, 2007 by C. Harmon


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215 of 220 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The best married couples' communication book I've read!, December 3, 1997
Like most people, my wife and I were never taught how to communicate effectively with each other. Ultimately, we ended up in marital therapy to try to save our marraige. We took turns reading the chapters of this short book to each other, then discussing what we had learned and how to put it to use. We learned more in a few nights than either of our therapists taught us, and at a tiny fraction of the cost! Our communications with each other (and with almost everyone else in our lives) has improved over 1,000%. Now, instead of just fighting over our respective positions on subjects, we can actually communicate effectively and get past our egos to get things accomplished and move on to the fun parts of life! If you don't yet know everything there is to know about really communicating with another human being on the very deepest and most effective level, then GET THIS BOOK!
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123 of 133 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Decent book but...., August 11, 2007
By 
C. Harmon (Middle of the US) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
but I found myself rolling my eyes at some of the analogies (such as describing why we fight as being because our 'self esteem bank account' is low and we want to make a deposit in it by arguing with a loved one). I did find some helpful hints about ways to diffuse an argument, but I did feel like most of the time the author wants you to 'give in' when arguing because he feels it is better to be loved than be right. I didn't feel like the author really gave any advice on how to handle serious issues where giving in isn't an option. For example, if your spouse is drinking too much and becoming belligerent should you decide that you like being loved more than being right and chose to get over the situation by making a 'deposit' in your spouses self esteem bank account so that they feel better about themselves and are less likely to fight? But to be fair, overall, the book is well written and easy to identify with thanks to the author's many examples, be they personal or from couples he has counseled. One of the best pieces of advice from the book was about calling a time out while arguing during which you spoon or cuddle with each other for five minutes and then resume your argument. Just like the author said in his book, when my husband and I tried this, we found that we no longer wanted to argue after the cuddling. And while the first minute of cuddling was awkward due to the argument, it really was effective in calming both of us down and putting things back in perspective. In my opinion this book is good if you are looking for a way to get over or completely avoid small arguments, but is not very helpful if you are looking to facilitate communication/get past arguments about more major issues.
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75 of 81 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Easy read and best advice, September 23, 2002
By A Customer
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I have read many many books on the subject of marriage and inherent problems. Married 37 years, I find myself in a separation. I chose several books to read to help me and this one was the best. Mr. Robinson very clearly and concisely talks about the acknowledgement, acceptance and appreciation all of us need in life. These tenents and ideas he has on blame and defensiveness hit home. I have only been separated a month but this has really helped me understand our conflicts. Now all I have to do is figure out a way to have my husband read it!...I recommend this to all couples and bought books for both my married and unmarried sons.
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51 of 54 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Communication is the Key, July 5, 2000
By A Customer
You've been hearing for decades how communication is the key to happiness in a relationship and without communicating, things are bound to fail. But for the most part, books rarely teach you "how" to communicate, they just tell you that you should. I know I should tell my wife "I love you" but I need help actually mouthing the words.
Fortunately, I discovered two books this year that actually helps me to express my love and devotion in my relationship. This book is excellent as well as The Romantic's Guide: Hundreds of Creative Tips for a Lifetime of Love.
Thanks you authors for helping me to communicate in a way that is right and good.
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48 of 51 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars This is a great communication book., August 8, 1999
By A Customer
This book has been of great assistance in helping me communicate with my husband in a non-threatening manner. I recommend it to anyone seeking to understand why their mate responds in a specific way. The ideas presented are uncomplicated and immediatly useful.
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40 of 43 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars LOVED IT!, April 29, 2002
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This is the the little book that my husband and I turn to when we have a communication problem. We have many, many books on our shelve, but its this one that seems to knock some loving sense back into us. I highly recommend this book to all couples, but especially couples about to enter marriage. We all should have read this book in high school.
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16 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars GREAT book. Hands-on, easy, to-the-point relationship rescue., May 30, 2007
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When I purchased this book, I chose it as an impluse buy in addition to another communications book that I thought would be great. Instead, after reading only a couple of pages of this book, I was floored with how quickly this short book targeted common communication problems with couples, and had easy solutions that you could start implementing right away. We have used the techniques in this book and find it very instrumental in saving our relationship. Our communication is much more what we mean to say now, and we have less tension in our commuunications. I highly recommend this book.
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23 of 25 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Fabulous ideas, practical tools for improving relationships!, May 28, 1999
By 
I wish this book was required reading in every high school across the country. This little book is full of great ideas. Not difficult ideas, but easy-to-use ideas that you can benefit from immediately. If you want to improve your relationships, (with your lover and with everyone) BUY THIS BOOK NOW. YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT!
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17 of 18 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Definitely One of Many Have-to-Read Books, May 2, 2006
I am a Divorce Mediator in Oklahoma and recommend this book to my clients who are not divorcing, yet have issues conveying their needs or desires. Whether it is help with the home duties or consideration of situations that arise, this helps encourage couples to view each other as partners/friends/lovers. This book tunes couples into more intimacy by connecting emotionally. Doing little things matter most.
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16 of 17 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Easy-to-use and effective techniques, March 24, 1999
By A Customer
This book provides many simple tools to utilize when handling problems that arise in your relationship. Lots of ways to de-fuse anger and really listen to what your partner is trying to say and understand why they're saying it. I liked it a lot!
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Communication Miracles for Couples: Easy and Effective Tools to Create More Love and Less Conflict
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