While feminism may have changed boardrooms, it didn't make much headway in bedrooms, argues philosopher/writer hooks. Women have made progress in regard to social empowerment, but the quest for emotional density for love has remained elusive. Why are men still so emotionally unsatisfying? Because, hooks argues, "patriarchal thinking has socialized males to believe that their manhood is affirmed when they are emotionally withholding." Patriarchy valorizes power and assigns it to men, and devalues nurturing and labels it feminine. Thus, young postfeminist women find themselves with "nothing to show" from their newly won equality but a double shift of work: first the paid job, then the physical and emotional homework of their relationship with their man. Still, as feminists of hooks's generation reach midlife, they may find it easier to rethink these terms of engagement, to risk changing things. The first step, she says, is self-love accepting one's body and soul just the way it is. Without such acceptance, women cannot escape the domination-submission dynamic. Even then, in this patriarchal universe finding love with another person may require some creativity. Hooks explores romantic friendships, lesbian loves and "circles of love" (which allow for committed bonds that extend beyond one partnership). A life with no coupling, but "a more authentic relationship between self and world," may also be satisfying. Twenty-something women who've embraced the highly problematic "bitch persona" Elizabeth Wurtzel has written of may sneer at hooks's affirming style, but older women, particularly those raising girls themselves, will find much to ponder here. (Feb. 1)Forecast: This should satisfy those looking for an alternative Valentine's Day gift for the leftist/feminist woman in their life.
Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
It's not true that you can love too much, social critic hooks warns women. Just let yourself go.
Copyright 2001 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Communion: The Female Search for Love by bell hooks
What does life in a patriarchal dominant society mean for women and love? Read more
This book put a lot of vague concepts I had thought of into words that made sense as well as introduced me to some new concepts and really helped me look at some things more... Read morePublished 14 months ago by Ali Trombley
This is one of my favorite bell hooks books. I have given out several copies of this book to my female friends.Published 16 months ago by CrownMetro
Wish I had read this book years ago. Required reading for both women and men. Great Valentine's Day gift for family, friends, and mentees.Published 19 months ago by ACDC
I have re-read this book numerous times throughout my life. It is very empowering for women who, as I have, been sucked into thinking that men (ie our romantic partners) are what... Read morePublished 21 months ago by Kathryn
READ the trilogy. Great books. Great message! Great author. This book has helped me tremendously on my personal journey. This whole idea of a love ethic is a radical movement. Read morePublished on September 2, 2013 by ShaClackClack
I enjoyed this book so much. Hooks covers a wide range of topics about how love affects everyone regardless of age and gender. After reading this books I feel liberated. Read morePublished on July 27, 2013 by stallionduck25
I've been searching for books that help me, as a man, understand my complicity in patriarchy, this book has done wonders for helping me delve further into the issue.Published on February 15, 2013 by M. Givens