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The Compassionate Classroom: Relationship Based Teaching and Learning

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This is a landmark book that all educators of young and elementary aged children deserve to become familiar with. "The Compassionate Classroom" has the power to transform and improve the classroom social scene and learning experiences of children and teachers alike.

Supported by the research and experience of psychologists and educators like Daniel Goleman and William Glasser, the authors' main idea is that education depends on positive relationships and that children and adults need to learn to communicate in a mutually supportive way to achieve this. They draw directly on the seminal work of conflict resolution mediator and trainer Marshall Rosenberg who says, "The objective of Nonviolent Communication is not to change people and their behavior in order to get our way; it is to establish relationships based on honesty and empathy which will eventually fulfill everyone's needs." Sura Hart and Victoria Kindle Hodson masterfully translate the principles of "nonviolent communication" so that children can understand and apply them. Some of the highlights of this book are the numerous practical activities and lessons that teachers can use with their students to improve their ability to listen with empathy to others and make requests that will be sympathetically heard.

Children learn better in a supportive environment where they feel emotionally safe. They need the tools to communicate "from the heart" in order to achieve this. On the contrary, in today's hurried world our students are often exposed to impersonal pressures and models of social interaction that promote indifference, competition, hostility and violent "solutions'' to personal or social problems. "The Compassionate Classroom" provides an antidote to all this and sets a different standard for our children, one that is humane and "life-fulfilling." Along with many fellow teachers I say a heartfelt "Thank you and congratulations!" to Sura and Victoria for this wonderful contribution to our practice.

I have worked in the field of education for over 25 years. I've been a classroom teacher, consultant, trainer, administrator, and state-level bureaucrat. For the last three years, I have been a professor in a teacher education program at a small state university in Pennsylvania. I have provided the above background so that my comments about The Compassionate Classroom may have credibility with amazon.com customers.

I am delighted to agree wholeheartedly with John Zurbrigg's review here on amazon.com. I will add that my interest in The Compassionate Classroom was inspired first by my studies in Nonviolent Communication (NVC), as developed by Marshall Rosenberg. Sura and Victoria have done a masterful job translating NVC to the classroom, staying completely faithful to NVC principles, explaining them clearly, and providing examples and activities for teachers to follow and use. I will be using The Compassionate Classroom as a text in one of my undergraduate classes this fall, and I am applying the principles in all of my classes henceforth.

I simply cannot say enough about The Compassionate Classroom. It absolutely excites me by giving me hope that we can create classrooms where the passion for learning is truly nurtured. My request is that you buy it for yourself if you are a teacher, and give it to every teacher you know as a gift. On behalf of children and our future, let's start transforming education today. This book gives us the tools!

This book is written for teachers. The first part of the book focuses on research and background for using positive, non-violent language with children and teaching them how to use it. The authors talk about the difference between what they call naming/blaming language and non-violent, positive language. The last part of the book gives many useful ideas to emplement in a classroom.

With bullying coming - finally - to the forefront in schools, this book is a wonderful, pro-active way to get started.

This is such an important topic! The schools need to teach the whole child - NOT to the test. NCLB act is leaving many children behind by not building relationship intelligence. This book is fabulous! We MUST create this sort of learning environment if we truly want to be a part of the change. As Gandhi said, "to teach real peace, we must begin with the children." I also highly recommend the companion book "the No - Fault Classroom" as well as Marshall Rosenberg's "Nonviolent Communication - A Language of Life". We can all be the change we wish to see!

The content of this book is easy to appreciate for its thorough approach to seeking to meet the needs of students. The first half of the book focuses on how educators think about themselves, their practice, and their students, especially about the emotional and educational needs of students. The language presented as a model for teachers to use is very caring, "I" centered instead of blaming others, and seems an excellent way to avoid negative communication---a rut that even the best educator can fall into when exposed to trying personalities.
The main premise of the book is that conflict occurs when a person's needs are not being met, and that it is possible to meet everyone's needs in a classroom. That is a wonderful way to think but may not be entirely realistic. Honestly, some of the communication approaches that are mentioned in The Compassionate Classroom are so thorough and thoughtful, that they might not be humanly possible to maintain--at least not without cue cards. The very real constraints of time and student population do render some of the suggestions for handling conflict between and with students as infeasible. Ideally, the communication processes are wonderful, and it would be great for all teachers to adopt a sincere, sensitive tone when approaching every student issue, but I ask whether or not all students would respond as genuinely as the author implies they would.
Aside from the above point, the methods for interpersonal communication between students and teachers, and students and students, are kind, caring and thoughtful. The most wonderful part is that the author includes many short exercises to help students practice "giraffe" speech, which is an insightful use of language that requires personal accountability for feelings instead of blame. These activities seem well suited for nearly every school age group, and would be a great focus for a teacher in-service day as well. It's a book that could be extremely transformational for teachers who are stuck in the same back-and-forth arguments with the same students, for principals who want to get to the root of children's behavioral issues, or for guidance counselors who are seeking to help children identify the complexities of their emotions.

This book provides practical tools for implementing a truly peaceful classroom. More importantly, the tools taught in this book stay with the child for the rest of his/her life. In our world of seemingly ever-increasing conflict, both in the home and abroad, this book should be a vital part of every classroom.