40 of 41 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The Complete Idiot's Guide to Body Language, March 2, 2007
This review is from: The Complete Idiot's Guide to Body Language (Paperback)
Let me first briefly mention my background. I hold a Master of Arts in Communication and I teach Speech & Communication Studies at one of the top community colleges in the US. I am fairly well versed in the research literature on nonverbal communication (NVC). I very much disagree with several of the reviewers of this book, though I do agree with the majority. Interestingly enough, I disagree with the reviews that are first seen on the site.
I think this book is awesome! It is the ONLY written-for-regular-people book on general nonverbal communication that I would recommend to others. While I have certainly not read every popular press book on NVC, I have read through at least sections of at least a dozen. All of the ones that I have perused contain ideas that are not supported by actual social scientific research. Dr. Andersen has written a wonderful book on NVC which is actually based upon real research.
(Quick note - there are other books written for regular people which deal with certain aspects of NVC which I would recommend. For example, I would recommend any of the works by Paul Ekman, John Gottman, Deborah Tannen, and Dane Archer; I would also recommend Brian Bates' The Human Face and Malcolm Gladwell's Blink. For a general book on nonverbal communication, though, Dr. Andersen's book is the best I have ever read.)
There are a couple of reasons why I suspect some of the reviewers did not like this book. I don't know that my suspicions are correct, of course. However, here is what I suspect is going on. First, I suspect that those who did not like the book are not aware of the current research in nonverbal communication. I don't mean that in a "snobby" way. Most people don't have the time or inclination to read scholarly journals. Second, I think some people wanted the book to contain the "secrets" of body language. They wanted to be able to almost read people's minds based upon their nonverbal cues. In other words, they wanted Dr. Andersen to say something like, "When people look at you and tilt their head in a certain way, it means they are thinking this way." Dr. Andersen repeatedly points out the inherent ambiguity in NVC and so, he does not include any bogus "secrets" like that. The viewpoint that you cannot read someone like a book is supported by the research in NVC but does not seem as exciting as claiming that you can.
I would like to address one criticism that a couple of reviewers level at the book. They say that Dr. Andersen states the obvious in the book. As a matter of fact, he does do this a bit, but I do not consider that a bad thing at all. Stating the obvious can raise our awareness of what we already "know." Let me give you an example. I often have my students do an activity where they get into pairs and be very good listeners for each other. They do this quite well. So, they "know" how to be good listeners. At the same time, I ask them to be aware of their listening behaviors outside of the classroom. Many of them report behaving in ways inconsistent with effective listening. So, they "know" how to be good listeners; they just don't do what they "know." By raising their awareness of what they already "know" about good listening, they are able to become more effective listeners.
I don't want anyone to misunderstand. This book is not just what you already know. There is much in Dr. Andersen's book that goes beyond what most readers probably already "know" about nonverbal communication. Many people might have heard that communication is only 7% verbal and 93% nonverbal. This is FALSE!!! It is NOT TRUE!!! Dr. Andersen points out on page 4 that these sorts of statistical claims are bogus and he tells you why. In Chapter 2 he discusses the relationship between the bicameral brain and NVC. This discussion goes way beyond "if a person smiles it means they are happy." The discussion of haptics in Chapter 6 goes beyond what you would typically read in a brief discussion of touching behavior. I learned some new stuff about olfactory communication in Chapter 9. The chapters on gender and culture contained some ideas that I doubt a lot of people will have thought about. For example, Dr. Andersen points out that men and women are not from different planets. I think anyone who has bought into the John Gray "men are from Mars and women are from Venus" concept should read this chapter.
Let me sum this up - I am reviewing this book from the point of view of someone who teaches Communication Studies at the college level. I am familiar with much of the research on nonverbal communication. I do not know Dr. Andersen personally and have no financial reason to recommend his book. This is the best general book on nonverbal communication I have ever read and I unreservedly recommend this book to anyone interested in the subject.
Jay Frasier
Instructor of Speech & Communication Studies
Lane Community College
Eugene, Oregon
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75 of 86 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Certainly a book for idiots, June 11, 2005
This review is from: The Complete Idiot's Guide to Body Language (Paperback)
This book was a waste of time and money. The author spends nearly 350 pages revealing things that are obvious to absolutely anyone. He tell us how smiles usually mean happiness, crying usually means you're sad, and faces that look angry.....CONVEY ANGER! The writing style is painful to read. I assume the writer is in his late 70's but trying to be "hip and with it." There are aweful jokes through out. He also likes lists and bullets that outline painfully obvious body language rules to follow. How do you tell if someone doesn't like how you're touching them? Are they wincing and flinching? Telling you to stop? Crying? It really goes like this. I couldn't finish this book, you shouldn't start it.
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27 of 31 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Waste of time and money . . ., June 10, 2006
This review is from: The Complete Idiot's Guide to Body Language (Paperback)
This book is so basic and boring. It lacks in visual aids and verbal explanation of the few visuals that it does have. I'll save you some money and some 400+ pages... In a nutshell this book says if someone is smiling they are happy, if they frown they are sad, and if their brow is furrowed they are angry. At the moment my brow is furrowed at the waste of time this turned out to be.
'Nuff said.
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