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The Complete Guide to Understanding, Controlling, and Stopping Bullies & Bullying at Work: A Complete Guide for Managers, Supervisors, and Co-Workers Paperback


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The Complete Guide to Understanding, Controlling, and Stopping Bullies & Bullying at Work: A Complete Guide for Managers, Supervisors, and Co-Workers + The Bully at Work: What You Can Do to Stop the Hurt and Reclaim Your Dignity on the Job + The Bully-Free Workplace: Stop Jerks, Weasels, and Snakes From Killing Your Organization
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Atlantic Publishing Group Inc. (January 12, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1601382367
  • ISBN-13: 978-1601382368
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.1 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #496,283 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
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This book is full of very helpful information.
W. Repke
Kohut's book is unique among books about workplace bullying because it strikes a nice balance between the personal and the practical.
Craig
If they had had this book I think things might have gone better for them.
Cynthia J. Nichols

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

25 of 25 people found the following review helpful By Craig on April 17, 2008
Format: Paperback
Kohut's book is unique among books about workplace bullying because it strikes a nice balance between the personal and the practical. On the one hand, it's a sympathetic self-help book for people suffering from workplace bullying, but on the other, it offers detailed procedures to change terrible situations, both informally and organizationally. It also stands out for discussing how managers and supervisors can deal with bullying both from above and with their employees. Her approach is more clinical than others by her suggestions on a range of research, which is much more useful than the more touchy-feely books on the subject which just try to make you feel better. Instead, Kohut tries to help you understand how and why bullies act the way they do. This helps you realize a) that workplace bullying is not your fault but the result of various flawed personality types in others, and b) that once you understand the bullies, you can deal with them more effectively. The case studies she includes for every type and situation are excellent ways to understand both how bullies operate and how to deal with them. But what I found most useful were her two chapters "Surviving Workplace Bullying and Considering Your Options" and "Bullying and the Law" where she lays out a number of options for both staying in a threatening workplace and taking legal action in the most extreme cases. Apart from offering incredibly useful advice that applies to many different situations, Kohut also summarizes the best of the many other books and research on workplace bullying (so, in a sense, you get many books in one). She also includes extensive appendices that list resources for further information on particular topics as well as a number of exercises and self-assessments to best determine which of her strategies will work for you. I can't recommend this book highly enough for people who not only suffer from workplace bullying but are ready to improve their situation as quickly as possible.
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23 of 25 people found the following review helpful By C. Mcnamara on September 26, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
A great book describing different types of bullies and case studies to let you know you aren't alone or imagining things. I was looking for "tools for my toolbox" and didn't find them. Only 6 pages talks about how to interact with bullies and I didn't see any real examples of calm and professional one liners to end or diffuse a situation when someone is trying to get you to act unprofessional. Hopefully I will get some advice on a book that will suit my needs. If I do, I will come back and update.
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful By Cynthia J. Nichols on June 3, 2008
Format: Paperback
This book contains everything you could possibly ever need to know about the types of bullies and bullying that exist in the workplace. Anyone who suspects they might be a victim of such bullying and wants to know how to deal with it would be well advised to get and read this book. From an introduction that explains much of the background and implications of workplace bullying through a complete and thorough description of every type of bully/bullying imaginable and on into a conclusion that gives clear, helpful, step-by-step instructions on how to deal with a bully, this book has it all. I found all the help I need in here.

The author covers a number of behaviors that I had never considered as bullying, but after reading the book I think she makes a strong case for including every element which she has put into this book. I particularly found the case studies helpful, as it put the theories and explanations into more human terms and made the contents of this book much more valuable to me. I found myself identifying with some of the victims whose situations were detailed in this book and was sorry to read about the unhappy outcomes that most of them had experienced. If they had had this book I think things might have gone better for them.

One thing that surprised me in reading this book was that I was able to identify not only workplace bullying but also bullying that my son endured when he attended school. I'm not talking about children bullying other children, I'm talking about a child who was targeted by adults because he was a bit quirky. Some of the victims in the case studies in this book were targeted for the same reason, the crime of being different.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By TheBanshee on December 22, 2008
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
The above is a quote from "Siobhan," a woman who was the victim of mobbing (group bullying, often acquiesced in by management) in the workplace. Almost 10 years after my own experience (as an older adult beginning massage therapy school; I was never bullied in the workplace in 32 years of working), the memory of that nightmare is as sharp as ever in me. In this important book, Kohut refers to Dr. Heinz Leymann's work on mobbing, and the 5 distinct stages: Conflict - Aggressive acts - Management Involvement - Branding the victim as "Difficult" or "mentally ill, " and inevitably, Expulsion. I went through all of that.

Since then, thanks to a loving husband and a lot of time, I have finished my MBA degree and have, on the outside at least, moved on. But just reading this book brought so much back to me that I can never forget or forgive.

But if you're a manager with the power to change things, you should read this book.

I will never forgive the people who left me to the mercy (not that they knew the meaning of the word) of my classmates. Except for those classmates and teachers who were kind to me, (and there were some, but like me, they had no real power) may God damn the others for what they did to me.

If you've been bullied, you'll find some of this disturbing. If you're a manager, you should read this book and take it seriously.
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