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Confessions of a Guidette [Hardcover]

Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi
3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)

List Price: $25.00
Price: $16.99 & FREE Shipping on orders over $25. Details
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Book Description

October 25, 2011
Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi has a lifestyle most guidettes dream about. But can she help it if she was born to love fake tans and juiceheads? In this must-have guide to being a guidette, America’s favorite pint-sized princess shares her secrets for ROCKING it, Jersey-style.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to arm yourself with bronzer, a tease comb, and makeup brushes and join the Snooki Style Revolution. When guidettes march in, people notice. It’s the attitude. The boldness. The sex appeal. The tan. The serious shortage of hairspray in the surrounding area. You have to experiment in life, or you’ll be boring. From her top twenty-five rules for being a guidette, to her smushable makeup and skin secrets, to her rules on Snookin’ for love, Snooki’s sickest tips and advice for friggin’ owning it are all here, along with hundreds of full color photographs and the official Snictionary for easy reference.

But that’s not all. There’s a lot more to the diminutive reality star than what you see on TV. Snooki shares her obsessions (her bed, Viva Glam Gaga bright pink lipstick, sci-fi movies) and some juicy behind-the-Shore secrets (which season was her favorite, what it was like to wake up in a jail cell in season two, why the house smells like alcohol and dog’s butt). For everything else, you’ll just have to read the book!

Being a guidette princess is about being yourself, doing what you want, and trying to have a good time wherever you are. So strap yourselves in, bitches! And get ready for the ride.

***

It’s the Snooki Style Revolution, bitches!

“My biggest nightmare is waking up pale. Or without eyelashes.”

“A guidette has to know how to have fun anywhere. Like, if you’re stuck in a cardboard box, you have to rock it.”

“LOVE my slippers. It’s like wearing beds on your feet.”

“If you can smell hair gel from a mile away, it signals guido mating season.”

“I like to wear so many accessories that people are confused.”

“Guidettes are born with attitude. It doesn’t matter if you’re tall, skinny, round, or a Smurf, or what your background is, we put on our bronzer and we fricken rock our princess status. Like, get out of our way, we don’t care what you think. Unless you’re a mirror.”


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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi is a reality television star who broke into the spotlight on MTV’s reality show Jersey Shore in December 2009. Her popularity on Jersey Shore helped make it one of the highest rated series in MTV history, with more than 5.7 million viewers tuning in for the finale.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 192 pages
  • Publisher: Gallery Books; Autographed Copy edition (October 25, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 9781451657111
  • ISBN-13: 978-1451657111
  • ASIN: 1451657110
  • Product Dimensions: 9.4 x 7.7 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.5 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #203,842 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

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Customer Reviews

I had great service in ordering it and was very pleased to recieve it. Tiffany Mims  |  1 reviewer made a similar statement
This book makes it for you using the brain tissue you sacrificed to be just like Snooki. Krestian  |  2 reviewers made a similar statement
I placed my order and 2 days later, had my book, great job. Michelle  |  1 reviewer made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
33 of 40 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Wow October 26, 2011
Format:Hardcover
I met Snooki tonight when she signed my copy of this book. She was unfriendly and seemed like she hated having to meet the people who bought her book. The book itself can be condensed into only a couple dozen pages of solid print as it is filled with pictures, quotes, and lists. The book gives lots of advice on how to be a proper guidette: never wear flats (they are for librarians), don't use bumpits (use a teasing comb), never have pale skin, etc. If you are able to find Snooki herself to be amusing, then you'll enjoy reading this book - definitely buy on Amazon (or wait for the paperback) as it is 10 bucks less than in stores and don't bother with the kindle version since it won't do the pictures justice. There are lots of previously unseen pictures of Snooki and her home life. This book is obviously very very light reading with little substance; it's a guilty pleasure, just like Jersey Shore.
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15 of 17 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A Decent Book if You Know what to Expect From It January 20, 2012
Format:Hardcover
This book is a guilty pleasure for anyone that's already a fan of Jersey Shore. I'm a guy that enjoys watching the show, and purchased the book for a friend. I gave it a read, and noticed that Snooki admits that her 15 minutes of fame have lasted longer than what she had expected. If you've ever seen her on the show, you should already know that you're not buying a book of profound thoughts, nor a ghost-written autobiography from some politician. It's simply what you would expect.

The entire book is obviously fluff. Snooki's take on fashion, men, family and friends. She offers basic back stories on what occurred during Jersey Shore, and her take on the housemates. There are a number of lists tossed around, and some interesting facts that you wouldn't have guessed about her. The book is padded with photos, which I'm okay with considering I find her to be an attractive Latina (she's Chilean, not Italian).

If you're a fan of the show, it's worth reading. If you're a diehard Snooki fan, it's clearly a must-read. But if you dislike the show, it makes no sense to review the book, as there's no way it could possibly appeal to you. It would be like giving a Paula Deen book to a diabetic vegan.

Almost every one-star review of this book has something in common: no one actually comments on the book itself. Every reviewer but one sticks to criticizing Snooki or Jersey Shore in general, rather than actually state what they disliked about the book. People get their entertainment from different sources, from spending hours surfing the web, to playing video games. I don't apologize for being a regular watcher of the show, or taking the time to actually read the book.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Wrong title July 30, 2012
By Paul S
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase
When I first saw the title "Confessions of a Guidette" I thought that this was a biography like "Sliding into home" by Kendra Wilkinson and I was excited to get to know Snooki better. I was wrong... This book is full of bla bla bla's and pictures! If you're a die hard fan of Snooki I think you will like this.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
3.0 out of 5 stars Snooki book review
This book was ok. The pictures were more interested. I thought it would be better. Wasn't very impressed. Nothing to do with the seller, just the book itself.
Published 1 month ago by Crystal
4.0 out of 5 stars a tru snooki book
Fun colorful book!! You can definately tell its by snooki. Its fun lots of unseen pictures of snooki jersey and everything. I love this and recommend it.
Published 2 months ago by Alexandra
5.0 out of 5 stars LOVE IT
LOVED IT, SO HAPPY I LOVE SNOOKI I LOVE THIS BOOK IM PLANNING ON GETTING ALL OF HER BOOKS AND GREAT SHIPPING ITS BRAND NEW I WOULD GET MORE BOOKS FROM THIS SELLER
Published 3 months ago by BLONDYLOVESCASH
5.0 out of 5 stars LOVE
I just recieved it, haven't read it yet. I had great service in ordering it and was very pleased to recieve it.
Published 3 months ago by Tiffany Mims
5.0 out of 5 stars Good
I really enjoyed this book into what snooki is all about. I read this book in a couple of days.
Published 3 months ago by stephanie landowski
5.0 out of 5 stars Arrived safely.
My daughter is a Snooki in training. She loves anything Snooki and watches the show all the time. Thanks and Merry Christmas
Published 4 months ago by susan adams
5.0 out of 5 stars Simply LOVE This Book!
I cant get enough of snooki & this book told me alot about her life & where she came from. I really enjoyed this book & im pretty sure any other jersey shore fan would like it too.
Published 6 months ago by BaddestMarie
5.0 out of 5 stars Funny!
This book was hilarious! Any snooki fan would love this book for the pictures, quotes, and snooki's original philosophies. Read more
Published 9 months ago by Miss Kentucky
1.0 out of 5 stars snooki = epic fail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this book is just garbage i use to live in new jersey but the jersey shore tv show is one of the worst shows ever on tv i use to like watching tv but mtv destroyed my childhood... Read more
Published 11 months ago by Darth Sidious
1.0 out of 5 stars Snooki - Confessions of a Guidette
Lookie, lookie someone got snookies cookie who cares about her idont like her or the show why watch a show about nj when i already live here iwatch more interesting shows heard she... Read more
Published 11 months ago by Kody
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