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Confessions of a Naughty Mommy: How I Found My Lost Libido Paperback – December 21, 2005


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 200 pages
  • Publisher: Seal Press (December 21, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 158005157X
  • ISBN-13: 978-1580051576
  • Product Dimensions: 7.5 x 5.5 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,556,541 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"a charming, hilarious, heartfelt memoir about the rekindling of her dormant sex life with her husband after her first child." -- Seattle Post-Intelligencer

More About the Author

My parents taught me, growing up, to above all else tell the truth and help others. That's what I'm trying to do. I want mothers out there to keep telling the truth -- to each other, to our partners, to society -- about what we're really like and what we need really need. I want us to feel safe letting out our inner naughties, and to have fun doing it. I want us to become "thinkaboutsexaholics" -- or at least to occasionally think about sex. I want us to let ourselves feel hot again, and let ourselves off the hook when we don't. I want to give this confused virgin-mother society a little push in the direction of sexy. And I want to let all those other sexy, tired, uptight, dry, stretched, sewn, poked, pulled, milked, saggy, hot, hairy, awesomely unstoppable mamas out there know they're not alone.

Customer Reviews

4.2 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

128 of 162 people found the following review helpful By A reader on June 13, 2006
Format: Paperback
I've been through this from the husband's perspective. We had three kids, and despite being physically fine, my wife just checked out sexually. Although she's a decent writer, Raykeil is also, like most mommies, incredibly self-centered. Pretty much the entire world revolves around her and her daughter, and her husband is left to fend for himself, which she even finds sort of amusing. It isn't. I never felt more alone, more lost, more desparate and more in anguish than when I was suddenly reduced to an ATM and an assistant in my own home. She doesn't, in the end, seem too concerned with what kind of damage this did to her husband, how unfair it was, how hurtful or how cruel. And, like mommies everywhere, she uses her status as a potent guilt-weapon. When her husband tells her that condoms reduce some of the sensation and pleasure of sex, she instantly retaliates with that time-honored "Well, try CHILDBIRTH buster!" She found hundreds of ways to make sure her husband knew she didn't care, she didn't want to be touched, she didn't need him. The dead giveaway for me was the line that she had spent something like a thousand nights with her daughter in bed with them. You cannot find a much clearer way of telling your husband that he is your absolute last priority -- and that how that makes him feel isn't really too important. Hit a nerve.
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20 of 23 people found the following review helpful By Diane B. Savahge on January 23, 2006
Format: Paperback
This frank and breezy account of one woman's step by baby step path back to sexy-ville is just what I needed! Since my husband and I had our daughter, our world is focused on this tiny, special person, and sleeplessness has blurred our eyes for any other type of love. I could relate when Raykeil calls her husband, "Poppy;" pre-baby I vowed never to call mine Daddy, and now do so all of the time, and not as in "Who's your Daddy?" Reading this book put our on-hold love life back in perspective, reminded me of my sense of humor and inspired me to put just as much emphasis on the naughty me as the mommy me. Give this one to all of your postpartum girlfriends!
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful By areader on December 29, 2005
Format: Paperback
My husband and I are reading this together. Since the birth of our baby, our sex life has disappeared. This book makes us laugh, not worry so much, and it's helping us get back into our pre-baby sexy groove.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Kathleen MacVean on March 21, 2006
Format: Paperback
I was a fan of Raykeil's column on the Literary Mama website, so I was looking forward to this book, and I was not disappointed. It is a wonderful mix of humor, despair, sexiness, and insight, and left me feeling very motivated to try to reactivate my own post-baby sex life! While having a baby around the house can be the catalyst for some sexual and relational upheaval, I don't agree with the reviewer who said that the issues just magically resolve themselves once the baby is more independent (and no longer nursing or co-sleeping.) I don't think Raykeil comes to that conclusion, either, and I appreciated Raykeil's honesty and her willingness to go deeper in order to really help her relationship grow along with her family. No, it isn't an instruction manual, but I think many couples can be helped and inspired by Raykeil's journey.
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14 of 18 people found the following review helpful By Dennis Mitton on December 29, 2005
Format: Paperback
Raykeil has written a fun and very readable book about recapturing her libido after childbirth. I expect that this will interest about 99 percent of the adult population. She outlines how having a baby and facing all of the added chores of parenthood diminished her interest in things 'naughy'. Happily for her husband she set out to do something about it. Happily for us she wrote it down. She gives a funny account of how she introduced playfulness, risk taking, and libidinous time management into her marriage. Good book!
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Format: Paperback
It is useful to read about the shared loss of libido and I'm glad that mothers are talking about it. I found it hard to relate however (and perhaps others will too) to her descriptions of the wild, delirious sex she and her husband had anyplace, anytime before children. How they meshed so incredibly perfectly and found eachother to be sublime after so many other sexual relationships. She goes on and on about these encounters that I wonder whether she really isn't trying to make people jealous. She talks about how "just this afternoon I wound up naked on my husband's black leather couch in his office". She also mentions in a few places in the book how her husband makes a substantial amount of money and she likes that. She has a wonderful trip to a spa by herself to rekindle her libido... It's hard to relate to unless you are a wealthy Berkley woman from a liberal background with lots of hot sex in your history and enough money in your future to permit some excitement. I'm not a prude, but I did find it hard to relate.
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2 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Cecilia F. Prytko on January 28, 2007
Format: Paperback
I loved this book! A person really can relate to the character in the book. Many of us just get so overwhelmed with the demands of parenthood that it is impressive how many families actually go on to have more than one child! The book does not offer a clear solution, but it is rather a diary of one woman's journey to revive her sexy self. It ends a bit unresolved, but leaves plenty of possibilities for one's own resolutions.
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