Customer Reviews

Confessions of a Naughty Mommy: How I Found My Lost Libido

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I've been through this from the husband's perspective. We had three kids, and despite being physically fine, my wife just checked out sexually. Although she's a decent writer, Raykeil is also, like most mommies, incredibly self-centered. Pretty much the entire world revolves around her and her daughter, and her husband is left to fend for himself, which she even finds sort of amusing. It isn't. I never felt more alone, more lost, more desparate and more in anguish than when I was suddenly reduced to an ATM and an assistant in my own home. She doesn't, in the end, seem too concerned with what kind of damage this did to her husband, how unfair it was, how hurtful or how cruel. And, like mommies everywhere, she uses her status as a potent guilt-weapon. When her husband tells her that condoms reduce some of the sensation and pleasure of sex, she instantly retaliates with that time-honored "Well, try CHILDBIRTH buster!" She found hundreds of ways to make sure her husband knew she didn't care, she didn't want to be touched, she didn't need him. The dead giveaway for me was the line that she had spent something like a thousand nights with her daughter in bed with them. You cannot find a much clearer way of telling your husband that he is your absolute last priority -- and that how that makes him feel isn't really too important. Hit a nerve.

This frank and breezy account of one woman's step by baby step path back to sexy-ville is just what I needed! Since my husband and I had our daughter, our world is focused on this tiny, special person, and sleeplessness has blurred our eyes for any other type of love. I could relate when Raykeil calls her husband, "Poppy;" pre-baby I vowed never to call mine Daddy, and now do so all of the time, and not as in "Who's your Daddy?" Reading this book put our on-hold love life back in perspective, reminded me of my sense of humor and inspired me to put just as much emphasis on the naughty me as the mommy me. Give this one to all of your postpartum girlfriends!

My husband and I are reading this together. Since the birth of our baby, our sex life has disappeared. This book makes us laugh, not worry so much, and it's helping us get back into our pre-baby sexy groove.

I was a fan of Raykeil's column on the Literary Mama website, so I was looking forward to this book, and I was not disappointed. It is a wonderful mix of humor, despair, sexiness, and insight, and left me feeling very motivated to try to reactivate my own post-baby sex life! While having a baby around the house can be the catalyst for some sexual and relational upheaval, I don't agree with the reviewer who said that the issues just magically resolve themselves once the baby is more independent (and no longer nursing or co-sleeping.) I don't think Raykeil comes to that conclusion, either, and I appreciated Raykeil's honesty and her willingness to go deeper in order to really help her relationship grow along with her family. No, it isn't an instruction manual, but I think many couples can be helped and inspired by Raykeil's journey.

Raykeil has written a fun and very readable book about recapturing her libido after childbirth. I expect that this will interest about 99 percent of the adult population. She outlines how having a baby and facing all of the added chores of parenthood diminished her interest in things 'naughy'. Happily for her husband she set out to do something about it. Happily for us she wrote it down. She gives a funny account of how she introduced playfulness, risk taking, and libidinous time management into her marriage. Good book!

I loved this book! A person really can relate to the character in the book. Many of us just get so overwhelmed with the demands of parenthood that it is impressive how many families actually go on to have more than one child! The book does not offer a clear solution, but it is rather a diary of one woman's journey to revive her sexy self. It ends a bit unresolved, but leaves plenty of possibilities for one's own resolutions.

It was honest, blunt and to the point. It shed light on alot of things that "housewives" feel. I like that in this modern day "sex" book, it focused on how honest we should be with our feelings. And it also showed that even if we are not "feeling" sexy or great about ourselves, it's still important to try to see our partners point of view. Be honest, but not selfish. Be true to yourself, understanding that your partners feelings are important in that relationship. Also I liked that she spoke of the phases that we have in our lives, that the "mommy - prudish" stage, is only that.... a stage and that after the children get older, we can get the romance back into our relationship.

It is useful to read about the shared loss of libido and I'm glad that mothers are talking about it. I found it hard to relate however (and perhaps others will too) to her descriptions of the wild, delirious sex she and her husband had anyplace, anytime before children. How they meshed so incredibly perfectly and found eachother to be sublime after so many other sexual relationships. She goes on and on about these encounters that I wonder whether she really isn't trying to make people jealous. She talks about how "just this afternoon I wound up naked on my husband's black leather couch in his office". She also mentions in a few places in the book how her husband makes a substantial amount of money and she likes that. She has a wonderful trip to a spa by herself to rekindle her libido... It's hard to relate to unless you are a wealthy Berkley woman from a liberal background with lots of hot sex in your history and enough money in your future to permit some excitement. I'm not a prude, but I did find it hard to relate.

This book is an easy read and was exactly what I needed. I could relate to everything. It was like a pep talk from a close girlfriend. It helped me realize that I am not alone and that there will be sex again!

This book is very witty. I very much liked the writing style. It's perfect for long winter nights... It will probably be more popular with women than with men. Well priced.

My other suggestions for winter nights include:
Sexy Mamas: Keeping Your Sex Life Alive While Raising Kids
Great Sex for Moms: Ten Steps to Nurturing Passion While Raising Kids
The Complete Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex, Third Edition