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Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman [Kindle Edition]

JB Lynn
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (130 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $7.99
Kindle Price: $3.79
You Save: $4.20 (53%)
Sold by: HarperCollins Publishers

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Book Description

Maggie Lee is not your average hitwoman. For one thing, she's never killed anyone. For another, after hitting her head in the car accident that killed her sister, her new best friend is a talking lizard—a picky eater, obsessed with Wheel of Fortune, that only Maggie can hear.

Maggie, who can barely take care of herself, is desperate to help her injured and orphaned niece get the best medical care possible, so she reluctantly accepts a mobster's lucrative job offer: major cash to kill his monstrous son-in-law.

Paired with Patrick Mulligan, a charming murder mentor (who happens to moonlight as a police detective), Maggie stumbles down her new career path, contending with self-doubt, three meddling aunts, a semi-psychic friend predicting her doom, and a day job she hates. Oh, and let's not forget about Paul Kowalski, the sexy beat cop who could throw her ass in jail if he finds out what she's up to.

Training has never been so complicated! And, this time, Maggie has to get the job done. Because if she doesn't . . . she's the mob's next target.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Besides being a writer, JB Lynn is a compulsive reader, a runner (of sorts), an enthusiastic cook (who doesn't get the appeal of the Food Network), and someone who has an irresistible urge to eavesdrop at all times.

JB has a great love of her husband, dogs, coffee, purple ink, spiral notebooks, running gear, hot showers, and '80s music. Given enough time, all of these things will eventually show up in her books.

Product Details

  • File Size: 509 KB
  • Print Length: 400 pages
  • Publisher: Avon Impulse (January 24, 2012)
  • Sold by: HarperCollins Publishers
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B006IY9C2O
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #24,718 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Absolutely LOVED LOVED LOVED this one! January 26, 2012
By Molly
Format:Kindle Edition
Oh. My. Friggin'. Gosh. This was AWESOME! I had a bit of a mix up, and got to read this a little later than planned, but again I say. Oh My Friggin' Gosh! It was so worth the mix up to be able to jump into this and spend a night reading this novel in it's entirety. I just could NOT put down J.B. Lynn's awesomely hilarious, suspenseful, sexy novel.

Margaret May Lee. Aka a neurotic hitwoman. Who talks to lizards. Yup. I thought the same thing. But, let me tell you. It was FANTASTIC! This lady is one bad butted woman. Her character was so complex and intriguing, witty, sassy and comedic all rolled into one. I laughed at her comments, her thoughts, her vocals when she was having her convos with the lizard. Which, mind you is NOT the gecko from the TV commercial.

After tragically loosing her sister and brother in law in an accident that leaves her niece in a coma, Margaret accidentally bumps into a man in the hospital and nearly clobbers him to death with a chair when she seems him trying to kill a young, innocent child. That is one of the many incidents that will change her life forever. She meets a man who offers her a proposition. Along the way, she finds herself confiding in this not a gecko lizard and bumping into sex cops.

Holy moly, I better stop there. I do NOT want to give this story line away. I'll say this...grab a copy of this book NOW! You'll laugh, laugh, laugh your head off as you follow Maggie on her mission of making a little cash to pay the bills. Throw in the talking lizard, the sexy cop, the up and down suspenseful twists, and you've got yourself one heck of a 5 Book worthy novel. I can seriously see this turning into a series....hint hint, Ms. Lynn! Maggie Lee would definitely make an awesome person to make come back in other novels.

This review originated at Reviews By Molly in part with a blog tour.*This review is based on a complimentary copy which was provided for an honest review*
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars LOVED IT January 24, 2012
By Dottie
Format:Kindle Edition
I loved this! I read it in a few hours! I'm not someone who usually buys into any sort of magic or make believe, but this was really engaging and funny! Maggie is a fantastic likeable heroine, and Godzilla (a.k.a GOD, a talking lizard) is hysterical.

I usually stick to contemporary commercial fiction because I, personally, rarely believe fantasy, but I'd read JB Lynn's "FIRST VICTIM" and loved it, so I figured I'd give this a shot! I TOTALLY bought it. Maggie finds herself in an impossible situation for all the right reasons, and I was really moved by her struggle; feeling stuck but having no real choice but to protect her niece.

Overall, it reminded of a quirkier, funnier Janet Evanovich. If you like the Stephanie Plum series, but want something new- definitely pick this up!
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Fast and Fun Read January 29, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition
JB outdid herself with this one. The characters she wrote are real and fun and vulnerable and gutsy. The main character - Maggie - is someone I'd want to hang out with even if she is 'remarkably unremarkable'. Patrick - her hitman mentor/hot cop - could buy me a beer any day. And Godzilla is a lizard I'd love to have around, even if I'm not a lizard lovin' person. I can't wait to see what JB has in store for us next.

Because there has to be a sequel. Or I might have to join Maggie in becoming a slightly neurotic hitwoman.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Don't let the hit woman thing turn you off!! August 8, 2014
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I really liked this book. I have been avoiding this series based on principle because it is about a hit woman. I just couldn't wrap my brain around the concept of liking a woman who murders people for a living. But I read some reviews and decided to give it a shot-it's always coming up at the bottom of the amazon page about other books that are similar to the ones I purchase. So Maggie is a very lovable character-she is so damaged and has experienced so much loss your heart just goes out to her. She doesn't set out to be a hit woman and she isn't trying to be some badass, she is just trying to earn some extra cash to help care for her niece who is in a coma as a result of a car accident that killed her parents. She isn't out to just whack "innocent" people. She's trying to take out a man who threw his son down a flight of stairs and is all around mean scumbag. Then she is inadvertently put into a position of needing to take out another hit man who is trying to hurt her and her family. I am not sure how this is going to be dealt with in future books cause I don't really condone what she's doing but at the same time, it's not much different than military operations that take our terrorists-these guys have hurt a lot of people kind of got what they had coming to them. The story line is great-the talking lizard is actually pretty funny. I thought that was going to be a turn off too, but its actually pretty funny. I like the way her attraction to some hunky guys are portrayed-it's not head over heels love at first site type of relationship. I was glad that she didn't just jump right into bed with Paul-she was going to and the interruption was a downer, but in the end it was for the best. And she continued to keep her wits about her and didn't go all sappy and lovestruck over him. Read more ›
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I thought everyone talked to animals July 8, 2014
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Personally, I also talk to lamps, and I'm not nuts either. It's particularly helpful when they respond. Ah, but I don't kill people. Pretty fun story. Who knew a hit woman hero could be so engaging.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars What a fun read!
The talking lizard got me....the action got me....the humor got me....the characters got me. Book finished, had to immediately buy two more. Read more
Published 10 days ago by D. McNicol
5.0 out of 5 stars fun read.
Fast, fun read.
Published 10 days ago by Jan1950
1.0 out of 5 stars I hated it.
I really hated it. I didn't finish. Sorry
Published 12 days ago by Alice L. Ramirez
5.0 out of 5 stars A GREAT START TO A GOOD SERIES
I really enjoyed this book. it's funny and exciting. This is a story about a hard as steel hit woman - NOT! Margaret is an entire collection of neurotic feelings. Read more
Published 29 days ago by Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Published 1 month ago by Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Remember the Rules!
I enjoyed this book so much! The characters are spot on and the plot kept me guessing. sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a hitwoman. Read more
Published 1 month ago by April J. Rosenthal
3.0 out of 5 stars Not my favorite book, but not too bad
It was kind of a fantasy book, in that the main character was able to talk to animals and they could talk to her and she could understand them! Read more
Published 1 month ago by Connie Moser
5.0 out of 5 stars Outstanding
I started reading this series with book 6. I realized I needed to restart with the first one. This of course gives you the reason and how things got started. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Kindle Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
laughed, then ordered the rest of series
Published 2 months ago by NancyKohout
4.0 out of 5 stars Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hit woman
I read this entire story thinking ...OMG... What the heck is this??? A woman training to be a hit woman??? The characters are all just a bit strange... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Carlotta
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More About the Author

When a fan told her that she's a "fabulous author", a "great sport", and a "very cool chick", JB Lynn immediately thought, "that's what I want my obituary to say!".

A Jersey Girl transplanted to the Sunshine State, JB (you can call her Jen) writes laugh-out-loud suspense and mysteries, along with goosebump-raising thrillers.

She also guzzles coffee, spoils her dog, wastes endless hours daydreaming, and does her best to be a "cool chick" (but if you ever see her running, swimming, or biking, you'll know how dismally she fails).

Find out more about JB and her books at


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