I don't even know where to start. The sex scenes were oddly nondescript even with some graphic language, and lots of cut aways. There were times I'd reread a scene to try and figure out what exactly they were doing position wise.
And the vampires needing to get off regularly because if they don't their testicals will literally explode? lmao hilarious, but it's very unintentional. It's written very seriously.
Just your average, girl who has never had decent sex and her husband left her because he had ~the gay~ meets two vampires who live to have sex and feed, and also have a magic show, and she runs out on them, and one is painfully shallow, and one almost rips his poor peen in half it's been so long since he's had a, uh, release, kinda "love" stories.
I'd say pass, but I guess if you want a goofy laugh it's only a buck.