Customer Reviews

The Connecting Church

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Randy Frazee gives us something to think about in this work. His diagnosis is solid: many people do not connect within the church, and attempts to connect are often, "contrived and forced..."; these words, "contrived and forced" are, in a sense, the heart of the book's agenda. Frazee wants to replace contrived attempts with genuine connectedness, and for that he is to be respected.

How can people learn to be social creatures again? Our society has lost its ability to connect socially, and many look to the church to provide the answer. When people do look, they are often disappointed.

Frazee shows how modern behavior patterns and mindsets sabotage the possibility of building deep relationships. His book is divided into three sections. The first, "Connecting to A Common Purpose" explores the problem of individualism and how discovering and agreeing upon Biblical purpose can (theroretically) address it. He offers practical suggestions, like limiting kids to only one sport, etc., so that families have time to get together with other families. The second section, "Connecting to A Common Place" talks about the need for stability: staying put in a church, in a job, and in a neighborhood. The third section, "Connecting to Common Possessions" is a very moderate approach toward helping and sharing with one another. Do not be afraid of this section: it is balanced and reasonable.

There are many quotables in this book. Here is my favorite from page 142, "Most pastors have come to realize that they can plan for new members to be a part of the church for only two to five years before these members move again. So prevalent is this mobility phenomenon that most people assume a new relationship isn't going to last long before one or the other of them (or both) moves away--so why bother getting started in the first place, the thinking goes."

Although I shouted a few "Amens" while reading this work, I disagree with Frazee's solution. The problem with this volume-- and others like it-- is that people who follow such approaches do not get comfortable with their humanity and that of others. Or, to put it another way, engineering relationships does not work. Even Frazee's program, if followed by people with this common "connecting deficit" defect, will still be contrived.

People who are social and value relationships will tend to stay put and build life-long friendships. The others can rarely be convinced. There is something dysfunctional about a person who cannot connect: the problem is not usually lack of structure. Though perhaps the majority of modern Americans do not connect well, the first step is to face the reality that they have the defect.

Tense people who long to connect often defeat connecting by their tense desire to do so. Connecting people are at ease with and enjoy people. And until a person is at ease with humanity and imperfection, he cannot be a connector. For example, one of Frazee's suggested social activity is watching videos together. People who connect (not because they are part of some contrived program) enjoy people so much, they'd probably rather play cards.

Additionally, better than connecting is becoming a connector. Since churches generally accept anybody, people with poor social skills get away with murder in a church context. We reward them.
If you really want to understand connecting, you are better off studying secular groups where people connect because they have relational depth, not because there is an ethic to include anybody and everybody.

Books like, "Bowling Along" (Putnam) are most illuminating here. Do you subscribe to and read your daily paper? Do you make the effort to meet a new neighbor? Do you watch the news and vote? Do you belong to clubs or civic organizations? Do you watch only a moderate amount of TV? Do you have people over for a visit at least once a month? Is your church attendance faithful, including dinners and special events? Do you serve in a ministry? Odds are those who said "yes" to most of the above are the real connectors.

Frazee is right in this regard: the church should provide opportunities for connection. But connectors will thrive even with few such opportunities, and most non-connectors will not genuinely connect no matter what the structure. Non-connectors, instead, need to realize that they have a defect and learn by imitating connectors how to overcome it. Opportunities to connect will train future generations and help those who are truly teachable and aware of their connecting deficit. And for these teachable people, Frazee's approach will work--if coupled with a desire to connect socially not only in church, but to the community as well.

I stumbled upon this book while browsing my favorite subjects at Amazon. The title was enough to move me to place an order though the book had not been released at the time. "Community" and "connecting" are the central subjects in this, another book which attempts to move us from our superficial satisfaction with hollow religious routine. I appreciate that Frazee does not lay down the how tos and steps, but puts his finger on the critical elements of healthy community life and leaves the reader to evaluate his/her own experience. He does a fine job of exposing the lonliness and isolation many churchgoers continue to suffer despite their involvment in small groups and programs. I recommend this book for anyone concerned about the health and welfare of their church, particularly those in positions of leadership who need to map a direction for improvement in Body life. My only dissatisfaction with the book is that he does not emphasize strongly enough the work of the Holy Spirit in drawing hearts, exposing need and inspiring life. He is the one element/factor/person without which all the church talk and activity is futile - wood, hay, stubble.

Individualism, isolation, and consumerism pervade American culture, says author Frazee, and they have invaded the church as well, undermining the church's call to be a loving community. The church's usual response to the cry for community--which is growing louder and louder with the mushrooming of postmodernity--is small groups. Small groups are a step in the right direction, but Frazee shows convincingly--to me, at least, and I'm a big champion of small groups--that most small groups fall well short of giving birth to authentic community. And, based on his extensive study of the elements that do produce authentic community, whether inside our outside the church, he shows why most small groups are something less than community.

Frazee's proposed solution is very tangible. In fact, it is being lived out in Pantego Bible Church in Arlington, Texas, where Frazee is the senior pastor.

His antidote to individualism is SHARED PURPOSE. His antidote to isolation is SHARED PLACE. His antidote to consumerism is SHARED POSSESSIONS.

Of course, his primary inspiration for this model is the New Testament church.

Most pastors won't have too much trouble with the idea that it is good for a church to have a SHARED PURPOSE. Not that that's easy to pull off, but there has been so much written about clarity of mission and vision that this is widely accepted, even if seldom put into practice.

But after that it gets a lot more costly to follow Frazee where he wants to lead us. He acknowledges that all three of these principles are very countercultural, and therefore they will not be easy to implement. But when the core values of a culture destroy community, the only way to nurture healthy community in that culture is to be countercultural.

By SHARED PLACE he means forming Home Groups within the church that consist of a few families who all live in the same neighorhood--defined as within easy walking distance. This is so that contact between the families can be frequent and spontaneous. It also means calling families to intentionally put down roots, to not pull up and move just because relocating can bring in another $5,000 to $10,000 in income. Building community will require making community a top priority in our lives. It also means simplifying life to have more time for relationships. Frazee suggests making the changes necessary to live on a single income (or one full-time income and a second part-time income generated from home). Countercultural stuff! But, Frazee believes, the price of recovering healthy community as a way of life.

By SHARED POSSESSIONS Frazee does not mean doing away with private ownership and pooling all money and property in a common treasury. Rather, he means internalizing and living by the New Testament attitude: "No one claimed anything he possessed was his own, but they shared everything they had." They still had possessions, but they no longer saw themselves as owning them, but rather as stewards (managers) of them. Which meant that when one member of the community had a need, and other members had the means to meet the need, they met it. As a result, there was no unmet financial need in the Jerusalem church. Frazee believes that is a mark of healthy community and that the church can relearn how to do that today.

Frazee's proposal is so countercultural that most churches won't consider it. We say we want community, but not many of us want to pay the price. We've become addicted to our two incomes, our excessive independence, and our self-sufficency. We aren't about to trade all that in on a simplified life and interedependence.

But a significant minority will welcome Frazee's example. I hope that some of those who do live within walking distance of my house.

It's amazing how many different methods and method-mongers are out there telling us, "This is the RIGHT way to 'do church' in the 21st century!" The methods range from chaos theory to a hierarchy so tight, one couldn't squeeze a pin head through the small hole bringing in the light.

Mr. Frazee falls into the middle category of those writers who have found a "new" way to "do church" in our 21st century. I believe he - in his zeal to accumulate data, opinion and facts - has found most of the truth why the church today is not effectively keeping people in the pews (or well cushioned chairs). I agree with Mr. Frazee on these points: We are not (as a church) teaching enough theology or Biblical doctrine or proper contextual/historical life application, and we are not (as a church) holding each other accountable to those Biblical doctrines. And I further agree the reason churches in general and small groups in particular are not "working" is a sore lack of teaching people how to love God and love their neighbor as themselves, asking them to show up more, demonstrating a changed life style, and modeling how to love God with all their heart, soul, mind, strength, and love their neighbor as themselves.

But I question how the whole testimony of Scripture can find its way into such a seemingly rigid worship and preaching/teaching structure (see the appendix in the book). A. W. Tozer - one of the greatest preachers and teachers of the twentieth century in America - bemoaned the current (pre-1963, but still current) lack of teaching the whole testimony of Scripture and Biblical doctrines. The possible danger I see in such a rigid plan, is those "pet" doctrines one becomes enamored with - because they're easiest to expound and so forth - are the only ones that the congregation is allowed exposure to.

And I question where the Holy Spirit is in Mr. Frazee's "new" plan? One of the greatest preachers and teachers of the twentieth century in England said that he never held to a preaching/teaching schedule, and never announced his sermon topic before Sunday (or any of the three or four other times he preached/taught during the week). The late Dr. D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones reported that he always waited upon the Spirit of God to direct him to his sermon topics. To Mr. Frazee's credit, his preaching/teaching topic structure is very thorough of the doctrines of Scripture and could, with proper guidance from the Spirit of God, help greatly in forming those "skeletons" Dr. Lloyd-Jones talks about that lead to solid preaching/teaching (see Dr. Lloyd-Jones' book Preaching and Preachers).

I would urge Mr. Frazee to add one chapter to his book. He could call it Common Persecution. Because if this church does follow Pastor Frazee into this way of "doing church," persecution will come. Jesus and His apostles promised us it would. Any time a person who is justified in Christ begins to produce the fruits of righteousness and holiness, persecution will come. Not just from outside the church, but inside as well. We desperately need instruction on how to react Biblically to persecution.

All in all, Mr. Frazee has given us a great primer on changing some of the core infrastructure in our churches, with his sound research and reasoned arguments. I recommend this book, will quote from it, and implement some of the insights into my small group. Thank you, Mr. Frazee for your hard and good work!

Many will be attracted by the premise of this book: the loss of community and its recovery.

Frazee and his church have made significant research and effort into exploring the topic and beginning its recovery. The main culprits that have allowed community to be eroded out of the American scene are individualism, consumerism and isolationism/independence.

The solution they discovered from among "community" doers exhibited a given set of characteristics (fifteen in all) which can be organized into three central foci: common purpose, common possessions and common place.

The stickler here is that this necessitates being countercultural.

Frazee outlines one way how this idea of Christian community could be played out in a congregational setting. He must be credited with not being dogmatic about his ideas or thoughts on implementation, e.g. "I openly confess that this is not an all-or-nothing proposition. ... In my estimation, the application of any of the characteristics of community will dynamically enhance the life of your congregation." This is exceedingly well said and is the premium reading this book provides.

A Biblical study of NT fellowship and unity, i.e. koinonia will garner much more emphasis around the God given means of grace, Word and Sacraments. As this is where the Lord is to call, nourish and lead His people, this should be far more the emphasis than programmatic organizational schemes. For this to happen as the Good Shepherd proclaims, He gives the church "the called and ordained servants of the Word" which Frazee downplays severly (pg. 233).

Christ's body should rejoice as this reader for this fine work which addresses many of the inherent faults with church growth up till now. His diagnosis of the need for more common creed, etc. are commendable. Get's one truly thinking about what should be at the core of "church," i.e. community.

The book is a great step toward community. What Randy Fazee is writing about is not how to start a small group ministry or about church growth, instead he is describing how Pantego Bible Church is intentionally working at authentic Christian community. For that alone, I think the book is worth while reading.

There are good examples and well thought out strategy accompanied by a good analysis of American culture. I agree with the overall cultural analysis but it seemed overly nostalgic at times, remembering back to the good old days when the world was a better place to live in. I remember Socrates complaining about a similar situation in Ancient Greece.

The book also does not address what different challeges there might be if one tried authentic community in an urban and multiethnic setting. This is to be expected since the Pantego Bible Church is a suburban church.

All that said, the book is on the right track.

Very easy read, but a very good read. I could not put it down, as much of the advice in this book is an extension of most of the reading material I've been led to read of late.

This book is worthy of five stars when Mr. Frazee finds time to add one or two chapters on Suffering. Because when a church becomes countercultural, there will be those who take advantage of it. Mr. Frazee keyed on Jesus' foundational teaching of "Love God . . . Love your neighbor as yourself." Not all in the church will "sign up" and fully participate. Mr. Frazee needs to give us warning - just as the apostles have in their epistles - that even those in the church will persecute their fellow Christians. Turning the other cheek, walking the extra mile, giving in when it isn't fair is not always reciprical in the Christian community. Even though it should be. And we need practical advice on how to react when fellow Christians are not being Christ.

And this persecution will not just come from within, but without the church as well. Not all the principalities and powers, both spiritual and non-spiritual, will like what we're doing when we're building common purpose, common place and common possessions in such a counter-cultural way. Again, how do we react to such situations?

Some dissappointments: the lack of quality quotations from our church's past. This breakdown in the church is not just a late 20th century phenomenom. It's happened before. Looking deeper into our church history can help us "discover" how our forebearers "fixed" these problems, and what methods we can use today.

A small request is to eliminate Mr. Frazee's numerical growth goals for his church. Although I appreciate the need to strategize for church growth, and it is good to have goals, it may be better to keep these goals internal to his church. We must never be pictured as simply number crunchers. Mr. Frazee admitted his addiction to the ABC's of church management and growth early in the book (attendence, buildings, cash). But we should be quite content in allowing God to "add to the church daily those who would be saved."

Randy Frazee's "The Connecting Church" is a book not unlike a coin; it has two sides--hope and frustration. Reading it will find you both wistful and pounding the table. Unfortunately, you end the book doing the latter.

Frazee is one of a cadre of author/pastors spearheading a self-proclaimed renaissance within Christianity. Often called "postmodern Christianity" or "The Emerging Church," this trend seeks to recover the spirit of the early New Testament Church. "The Connecting Church" embodies one of the most prominent aspects of Emerging theology: recovering deep human relationships via a "satellite house/neighborhood church" model.

Tested within his own church in TX, the ideas espoused by the author take small groups to the extreme. Instead of traveling by car to a small affinity group of ten or so, the small group is your entire neighborhood. You reach your neighborhood by incorporating the people in it into your group through strong relationships and friendship evangelism. In a variation, a set of Christians moves together into a neighborhood and pursues the same ends.

The part that few people will object to is living out a Mayberry-like ideal of community. You open your homes and lives to your group. You socialize with your group daily, almost to the exclusion of other relationships, pouring yourself relationally into a set of people that will stay together for years. Its an accumulation of social capital now sorely lacking in most people's lives.

The larger church body itself works to enact a consistent discipleship program that supports the neighborhood groups. It has a distinct preaching cycle that repeats yearly. This program has measurable checkoffs for spiritual growth, meaning the church can see how effective it is in this area. The teachings aim to release people from a prison of consumerism, careerism, and isolation into a balanced love of God and love for others. In its purest form, this model moves into a semi-communal living mode that can even include shared possessions.

A superficial reading of this book yields an immediate desire to make it work. I know that I would love to try to make such a community possible. But problems exist. As much as Frazee insists that people stay in one place, the nature of work today means that a family moves nearly every seven years, usually as a result of work situations. With the last recession forcing many families to move just to put food on the table, unless the Church in America is willing to work harder to help Christians keep their jobs, the dream of staying in one place is elusive. Truth is, the small rural communities revered in "The Connecting Church" are progressively becoming ghost towns because the jobs went elsewhere.

There are other issues with idealizing small, tightknit, rural communities; in the book, the very model Frazee encourages cannot be applied to small, rural communities at all! It's inherently a suburban or city-only model. It's odd that Frazee cannot provide a workable modern solution for the very type of community he idolizes. I live in the country, and as much as I'd like to implement Frazee's model here, the basic elements of it do not play well in the countryside.

Lastly, the emphasis on keeping neighbors together creates an unintentional ghetto-ization of the Church. If the residents of a rich neighborhood are encouraged to stay together exclusively, as is the poorer neighborhood, when will they mix? They used to mix on Sundays at the church, but Frazee encourages hanging with your group even at the whole church meetings. And as much as the goal is to create multigenerational, multicultural communities, most neighborhoods are remarkably homogeneous.

In the end, the proof of concept is in the doing. Churches in my area that have adopted the model in "The Connecting Church" have been disappointed in the results, many abandoning it altogether. People are quite set in their ways, and the old small group model that is based mostly on affinity is not that creaky, yet. Like the Israelites who had to entirely die off before their descendants finally entered the promised land, this generation of Christians may some day pass on and allow Frazee's model to assume prominence in an upcoming generation that fully embraces it.

"The Connecting Church" is filled with great ideas and will definitely get you thinking. Hopefully, Frazee will work out the bugs and find an audience willing to give it a try.

The important offering this book makes to the Church in this day, I think, is how it recaptures the idea of Biblical community (which of course, fleshes itself out as sharing a common vision, common values, a common place...etc...). It speaks of "connecting" to each other, connecting to God...

I will be intrigued to see how Frazee's vision (no doubt God-inspired) fleshes itself out in other locales, as other leaders begin implementing like ideas. Even if you can't lead your congregation to do the things he suggests (going to a small group structure, etc.) there are still some valuable concepts you can take that will show you how to connect better with those around you at your church, your work, and in your home.

Face it, we're lonely people. And we need each other. This book is important in that it takes an honest look at that... the lost art of belonging...

I found myself excited and dissapointed as I read Randy's ideas of how we can create biblical community in today's society. Do I have true community in my current relationships? Is it something I can attain? The book helped me rethink my own understanding of what community is and what it's place is in the church. Many of the ideas in the book are very agressive in nature, and I found myself reflecting as I read on how they could be implemented in my situation (church planter of new church - 3 months old - in small town) The principles are totally transferable. I'd agree with Randy that people really want to be loved and cared for by others, and his book offers some of the best ideas I've read in a while. Classic example of eat the meat, throw out the bones. Teh whole Zone pastor idea is great, but would not be as effecive for us. However, I'm all over the concept of neighborhood.