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166 of 172 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars you need this book wherever you are; Even alone on an island
Coping with Difficult People is an amazingly useful book. Difficult people are all around you, even when you're alone: Most people don't realise just how difficult and unconstructive they can be! This book gives helps you identify difficult behaviour, and how to get around it.
WHAT THIS BOOK GIVES YOU
Difficult behaviour is not all that difficult to...
Published on August 6, 2000 by Mayer Goldberg

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32 of 36 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars I liked the concept of this book
The concept of this book is good. You can't change other people, and you can't always avoid them. The most realistic option is to have some coping strategies. I think the author outlined them well. I gave the book three stars, though, because the reading got to be tedious and boring. I've read similar books that are more enjoyable, either because you can identify the...
Published on February 4, 2007 by Book Goddess


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166 of 172 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars you need this book wherever you are; Even alone on an island, August 6, 2000
By 
Mayer Goldberg (Beer Sheva, Negev Israel) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
Coping with Difficult People is an amazingly useful book. Difficult people are all around you, even when you're alone: Most people don't realise just how difficult and unconstructive they can be! This book gives helps you identify difficult behaviour, and how to get around it.
WHAT THIS BOOK GIVES YOU
Difficult behaviour is not all that difficult to identify. That is, unless you're in the middle of a confrontation and you're either too annoyed or intimidated or distracted to realise what's taking place. This book won't turn you into a psychologist, but it will teach you how to identify difficult, destructive, problematic behaviour in people, and how to cope with it.
This book is about coping. You can't always convince someone, and when someone's determinsed to make life difficult for you you can't always win. But you can try to push ahead, keep your cool, remain focused and constructive and pleasant and not be trampled on. If you're experiencing a difficult time because of co-workers or friends or family members, having read this book, your life will not become all of a sudden easier and simpler and nicer. Difficult people will continue to make your life difficult. But if you follow the suggestions in the book you should be able to neutralise most of the difficult behaviour to the point where you can get things done.
WHY DOES IT WORKS WITH OTHERS
This book will help you because it's recipe oriented, and if you become adept at it, you will be able to use its suggestions under pressure -- the elements of surprise or helplessness in the difficult behaviour will be missed on you. Key phrases, key words, body language are used to identify a type of difficult behaviour/person. Then a basic approach is tailored around the type of difficult person you're dealing with, though you will need to adapt the material in the book to your particular environment, situation and style. The better you anticipate an encounter with a difficult person and plan for it, the less of a surprise will that person enjoy, the less a sense of inevitability and helplessness will he be able to instill in you. In that sense, this book is the equivalent to a book on Chess openings. It's very effective.
WHY DOES IT WORKS WITH YOURSELF
Almost everybody is a difficult person sometimes. This book will help you identify patterns of difficult behaviour in yourself, and will give you some rudimentry insight into why you're behaving that way. Becoming conscious of when you exhibit difficult, uncooperative, destructive behaviour -- with what people, in what situations, etc, is a first step to curbing these tendencies within yourself.
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161 of 168 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars the real difficult person is inside you, March 19, 2003
Most people have difficulty in dealing with certain personality types. An inability to deal effectively with others can cause very serious problems in morale, job performance and self esteem. It has been said that most problems related to losing one's job has more to do with human relations than with job performance per se. As a person who has been fired many times, I can attest to that statement. I've seen incompetent people keep their jobs, but I've seen several people (myself included) lose their jobs over inter-personal conflicts which seem silly in comparison. The more one is able to resolve and or avoid conflicts, the more successful they will be in the long run.
This book divides difficult people into seven different types namely "hostile-aggressives", "complainers", "silent and unreasponsives", "super-agreeables", "negativists", "know-it-all experts" and "indecisives". Each type of behavior is explained and real-world examples of each in action are given. The forte of the book is how it explains how to cope effectively with each type. In my dealings with others, I've found that the coping advice given is right on target. Chances are, any type of difficult person will fit into one of the aforementioned categories. If not, they will be a variation or a combination of two or more of them. The coping methods given in the book are not always easy to implement because they require a lot of practice and may require a great deal of courage. This isn't a book to just read once, the methods must be studied and practiced if you wish to benefit from it.

One of the most interesting things I've discovered when reading this book is that I have fit into some of the categories of difficult people at times. The more effectively I can learn about and fight my own difficult behavior, the easier it will be for me to deal with others who possess the same traits. Regardless of how much one knows about dealing with difficult people, it can still be a battle to implement the methods given in this book. Therefore, coping with difficult people is not about using some simple trick, it's all about confronting the difficult person within each of us.
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86 of 88 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Resource, February 13, 2001
By 
Ms Diva "cycworker" (Nanaimo, B.C. Canada) - See all my reviews
Usually I don't like books of this sort because I find them simplistic. Admittedly this book is written for a general audience, but the author still makes an effort (and succeeds, in my opinion) in distinguishing between people who fit in to one of his types and people who can be difficult at times, but don't quite fit in a specific category. I never had the feeling of "oh, that could be anyone." And the techniques he gave to deal with difficult people were concise and easy to use. He really focuses on the fact that we can't change others, we can only change how we chose to respond, which is vital. A very positive, encouraging, readable book. I've already noticed a difference in my relationships after only a few weeks.
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46 of 46 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Coping Advice for the Workplace, September 14, 2004
I've read this book at least a dozen times since I purchased it, and it only gets better with each rereading.

Bramson provides an amazingly easy-to-read yet useful strategy for coping (primarily in the workplace) with difficult people. Rather than attempt to give advice on assertiveness training for the reader, Bramson instead encourages the reader to more carefully observe the situation and analyze the difficult person's behavior. Realizing that difficult people behave in a difficult manner because they have learned that such behaviors help them get their own way is a major lesson that Bramson teaches. Bramson not only covers overt bullying (he calls these people "bulldozers")but also equally difficult people who are overly quiet, sarcastic, procrastinate, or habitually nay-say. I suffer from several such people at my college department (a psychology department no less!) and I can vouch for the truth of Bramson's wisdom.

This book is not a quick-fix, but it can help you cope with other's difficult behavior. I recommend this to anyone whose job requires teamwork. This book is pop psychology at its finest.
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32 of 32 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An excellent and practical manual on how to handle anyone., July 25, 1999
I found this book (audiotape)to be an excellent and very practical manual on how to handle both difficult people in everyday situations as well as everyday people in difficult situations. What is really good about this book is that it gives the exact sentences, words, and phrases to use in various situations. It provides an actual script for what needs to be said when coping with difficult people.
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22 of 22 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Coping with Difficult People, December 9, 1999
By A Customer
The book has provided me with techniques and phrases which will stay with me forever. I have already put the coping methods into practice, successfully. The book identifies the seven types of difficult personalities. Awareness of these is of immense value - the words and methods build into a powerful tool for coping with all difficult situations. This book is a must!
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32 of 36 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars I liked the concept of this book, February 4, 2007
By 
Book Goddess (Northeast, OH USA) - See all my reviews
The concept of this book is good. You can't change other people, and you can't always avoid them. The most realistic option is to have some coping strategies. I think the author outlined them well. I gave the book three stars, though, because the reading got to be tedious and boring. I've read similar books that are more enjoyable, either because you can identify the different personality type with humor, or because they explained the personalities more realistically with better situational examples. This book seemed a little dry.
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Helpful advice, January 19, 2007
Bramson wisely uses the word 'coping'. That is he is not suggesting that one can really overcome or transform difficult people. He is speaking primarily about difficult people in the working place. The domineering aggressive abusive type should according to Bramson not be reacted to with anger and rage. One should also refused to be intimidated, and instead asset one's own views. The sniper who by little satirical remarks, and efforts at humor tries to hurt and diminish should be confronted and questioned as to his true intentions. The complainer should be opposed with positive ideas on the same project that the complainer is negative about. The know-it-alls, the silent- negative types, the indecisive also can in some way countered and dealt with.

Above all the aim must be to prevent these negative types from dominating one's own mindscape and action.

All of us confront in one way or another difficult people. And each of us is perhaps in a certain way a difficult person himself. This book is addressing a subject we all in some way know, and have connection with.

One other point. I have known and loved in my life very very difficult people perhaps beyond in a way described in this book.The fact is it is often what is difficult in them which somehow more strongly binds them to us.

This is a complicated subject about which there are worlds to be said.
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25 of 28 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars In Business maybe but not in Life!, January 20, 2009
Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Coping with Difficult People: In Business and in Life (Audio CD)
I feel that this audio cd's claim that "Coping with Difficult People: In Business and in Life" was false advertising. If you're looking for how to deal with difficult people in the business world, than this cd would be of help. However, if you're looking for how to deal with difficult people in a personal setting such as difficult friends, family members, etc., beware you won't find it in this cd. Since I was looking for help in dealing with how to deal with difficult relationships in my personal life, I was very much disappointed and let down that it did not cover this area as it claimed.
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Read and share with your co-workers, January 18, 2000
By A Customer
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After the second chapter I got on line and ordered more copies for my friends at work. The author captures it all. Highly recommended and well worth reading.
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Coping with Difficult People: In Business and in Life
Coping with Difficult People: In Business and in Life by Robert M. Bramson (Audio CD - July 8, 2008)
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