Coping with Life after Your Mate Dies [Paperback]

Donald C. Cushenbery (Author), Rita Cushenbery (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: August 1, 1997

Written to be read easily at a stressful time, this book deals with grief and the practicalities of facing life after the death of a spouse.

Product Details

• Paperback: 110 pages
• Publisher: Baker Books; 2 edition (August 1, 1997)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0801057655
• ISBN-13: 978-0801057656
• Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.5 x 0.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 5.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,189,272 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Coping With Life After Your Mate Dies, June 11, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Coping with Life after Your Mate Dies (Paperback)

I work in a Health Care related job and deal with sickness and/or death everyday. This book came highly recommended to me by a customer who knew my father had recently passed away and my mother was in the biggest struggle of her 73 years. It seems we (my family) have tried everything to help to no avail. I purchased this book for her but she left it untouched for nearly 2 weeks when I took it and read it in 2 days..good for me..it takes me much longer than the average reader to grasp concepts. I strongly urge anyone who is in a similar situation to read this book FOR their parent who has lost their mate. It contains real-life examples of coping mechinisms and actual situations to apply them to. After reading this book, I understand why my mom doesn't want to be hugged or "pampered", which children (even grown ones like my brothers and sister) tend to do. It gave me tools to apply to my moms empty and apathetic attitude. It not only gave me sensible comments to follow up with when she was negative but most importantly the courage to comment. I do not feel like I need to tip-toe in my moms presence any longer and she has began to open up and talk to us. I owe these authors a big thank you for sharing their life experiences and now my mom has asked me to bring her the copy I purchased and I am ordering other books on the subject today. The best example of the content of this book is to understand grief is a normal but devastating response to the loss of a life partner not just a black cloud hanging overhead that goes away with time. It takes work and this book gave me tools to convince my mom she needed to be proactive and not just set in the chair counting days, dreading each one because they don't pass fast enough. She is going to her first grief counseling session tomorrow and not only would we not have even mentioned it to her that she needed to do this but she would have refused to even listen before I read this book and shared it with my family. After she reads it next, I would gladly share her thoughts with others needing similar help with something no one wants to think about but everyone will experience in their lives at some point..like it or not! As the book states (in my words) you can not "run away" in denial forever and expect to have anything close to a "normal" life again. Our lives will never be the same but we can now help my mom help herself and stop grieving for her, feeling helpless and watching the calender days pass with her. We are all looking forward to tomorrows session including my mother!

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Good tool for relatives helping loved ones with grief, June 11, 2000

By 

C. Smith "ljc22" - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Coping with Life after Your Mate Dies (Paperback)

This book is a very good tool for those who have loved ones that are grieving over lost ones. It is not so good for the ones actually grieving. If one were to purchase this book, it would be very helpful in understanding grief and how to help those you care about cope with it more easily. If you are someone in this position, I feel this book could be very helpful for you.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Coping With Life After Your Mate Dies, June 11, 2000

By 

C. Smith "ljc22" - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Coping with Life after Your Mate Dies (Paperback)

I work in a Health Care related job and deal with sickness and/or death everyday. This book came highly recommended to me by a customer who knew my father had recently passed away and my mother was in the biggest struggle of her 73 years. It seems we (my family) have tried everything to help to no avail. I purchased this book for her but she left it untouched for nearly 2 weeks when I took it and read it in 2 days..good for me..it takes me much longer than the average reader to grasp concepts. I strongly urge anyone who is in a similar situation to read this book FOR their parent who has lost their mate. It contains real-life examples of coping mechinisms and actual situations to apply them to. After reading this book, I understand why my mom doesn't want to be hugged or "pampered", which children (even grown ones like my brothers and sister) tend to do. It gave me tools to apply to my moms empty and apathetic attitude. It not only gave me sensible comments to follow up with when she was negative but most importantly the courage to comment. I do not feel like I need to tip-toe in my moms presence any longer and she has began to open up and talk to us. I owe these authors a big thank you for sharing their life experiences and now my mom has asked me to bring her the copy I purchased and I am ordering other books on the subject today. The best example of the content of this book is to understand grief is a normal but devastating response to the loss of a life partner not just a black cloud hanging overhead that goes away with time. It takes work and this book gave me tools to convince my mom she needed to be proactive and not just set in the chair counting days, dreading each one because they don't pass fast enough. She is going to her first grief counseling session tomorrow and not only would we not have even mentioned it to her that she needed to do this but she would have refused to even listen before I read this book and shared it with my family. After she reads it next, I would gladly share her thoughts with others needing similar help with something no one wants to think about but everyone will experience in their lives at some point..like it or not! As the book states (in my words) you can not "run away" in denial forever and expect to have anything close to a "normal" life again. Our lives will never be the same but we can now help my mom help herself and stop grieving for her, feeling helpless and watching the calender days pass with her. We are all looking forward to tomorrows session including my mother!