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A Couple's Guide to Communication Paperback

ISBN-13: 978-0878221271 ISBN-10: 0878221271 Edition: 0th

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A Couple's Guide to Communication + The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships + The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 220 pages
  • Publisher: Research Press (June 1979)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0878221271
  • ISBN-13: 978-0878221271
  • Product Dimensions: 0.8 x 5.8 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (14 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #69,139 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

John Gottman, Ph.D., is world-renowned for his work on relationship stability and divorce prediction, involving the study of emotions, physiology, and communication. He was recently voted one of the Top 10 Most Influential Therapists of the past quarter-century by the PsychoTherapy Networker publication. His 35 years of breakthrough research on marriage, relationships and parenting has earned him numerous major awards.

He is the author of 190 published academic articles and author or co-author of 40 books. Dr. Gottman is the co-founder of The Gottman Institute where he currently teaches weekend workshops for couples and training workshops for clinicians. He is the Executive Director of the Relationship Research Institute, where programs have been developed for parents transitioning to parenthood and are beginning a new research project on treatment for Domestic Violence. Dr. Gottman is also in private practice in Seattle and sees couples for weekly and intensive marathon therapy sessions.

Customer Reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

187 of 191 people found the following review helpful By A D Heller on April 24, 2000
Format: Paperback
This book was recommended for me to read by my Sociology Professor instead of John Gray's work, Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, and I love it! I've delved a little into both texts and enjoy Gottman's work better since its suggestions are backed by years of clinical research on how thousands of couples communicate and presents the strategies that worked best for them, where Gray's are more based on observations. This book gives practical step by step knowledge of how to communicate with your partner and the little snags that you run into day by day without even knowing it. I consider my partner and I very open and able to communicate with each other, but reading this book showed us that even we could use some improvement; it has helped me to see where my ability to communicate goes astray and gave me ways to work on them. The language is easy to understand and there are even practice exercises you can do with your significant other to review the information he presents. The book presents a whole program that you can do to help you communicate better with your mate or even anyone you come into contact with. If you are the kind of person who constantly is searching to improve your life, then this is a book for you!
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42 of 46 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on December 2, 2003
Format: Paperback
This book helped me understand that we often do more damage to our relationships even when we intend to make things better. After reading this book, I see that there are so many things that I noticed in myself and my partner that negatively affected our relationship. We are now on the path to correct these things and our relationship is getting better month by month. This book as well as a very enlightening book called "The Ever-transcending Spirit" by Toru Sato are Godsends to us. They have saved our marriage and made us more positive and hopeful about our own lives! If you read these books, you will understand what I am saying. Good luck on your journeys together!
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41 of 48 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on August 3, 2007
Format: Paperback
This book was published in 1976. There are more current books by the same author that are much better. He is a researcher who was just "starting out" in 1976 and has since made new discoveries so that this book (examples for sure) are very out-of-date for today's world.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Galen Sather on November 9, 2007
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Although the book is now over 30 years old and some of the examples seem a bit foreign, "A Couple's Guide to Communication" helps partners take the emotional charge out of arguments and get to the heart of the issue. I am extremely impressed by techniques that help to check the intent of your message against the impact it makes on your partner, leveling and editing conversations, verification of each others feelings... and more! We now recognize that a single word used in an argument can change the entire message, how to remove the emotional charge when conversing, how to make our point without offending each other and how to succeed in validating and respecting your partners persons position without necessarily having to agree. This book puts daily bickering in perspective and gets to the heart of why the bickering occurs with activities and discussion directives to guide conversations that you and your partner would have had anyway, but are now productive and not destructive. I highly recommend it to anyone wanting to feel closer to your partner through real transcendental conversation - and may provide new fulfillment in your physical relationship as a result!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Rosie2U on September 12, 2009
Format: Paperback
I bought this book at a psychology conference in 1980 and it has remained a treasure to me ever since.

Yes, it is true Gottman wrote this book way back, but it still has much to offer and I find that it's straightforward style suits both myself and my clients.

Of course his later books have much to offer also. It is just that this is one I find myself seeking out and sharing its content with my clients. And what it covers is STILL very helpful. Old truths have no "use by" stamp on them. And Gottman has always had a lot to offer. I am very grateful to him for his assistance through this book.

But by all means seek out his other books; they are also helpful in their own way and maybe one of them will speak to a particular person better. Certainly, if one believes the most recent of something is automatically the best, that person should choose recently published books for the sheer placebo effect upon him or her. But I think there is are flaws/assumptions in the reasoning behind such a choice - think about it.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Robert W. Spradling on December 18, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I use this book to help inform couples about how to better communicate with each other. It is the book of choice that I use in pastoral counseling with couples.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By M. Farmer on November 20, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Excellent material with cases, observations, analyses and exercises. With a willing, open partner, communication between spouses (and others) can readily be improved.
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