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The Couple's Retirement Puzzle: 10 Must-Have Conversations for Transitioning to the Second Half of Life Paperback – April 5, 2011


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Paperback, April 5, 2011
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 306 pages
  • Publisher: Lincoln Street Press (April 5, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 9781936498079
  • ISBN-13: 978-1936498079
  • ASIN: 1936498073
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #367,942 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Roberta Taylor and Dorian Mintzer are experienced psycho-therapists, coaches, speakers and workshop facilitators who specialize in helping couples reinvent their relationships in the second half of life. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

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Customer Reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
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The book contains some great questions to ask each other when discussing difficult topics.
Janelle Winston, SpeechCoach Company
It's a must read for any couple wanting a satisfying retirement on their own unique terms, and I recommend it wholeheartedly.
Amy Wood, Psy.D.
The authors' sharing of their own life and retirement journeys adds to the warmth and accessibility of their writing.
Barbara Abramowitz, LHMC, LMFT

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

15 of 16 people found the following review helpful By William A. Sadler on September 1, 2011
Format: Paperback
COUPLE'S RETIREMENT PUZZLE
Retirement has become a puzzle, because it's no longer what it once was - a short stage after years of working before the end of life. Because of our greater longevity and vitality, retirement is being redefined; for many of us it is an evolving process of transition with surprising possibilities and challenges leading to personal fulfillment. But how can we make it something so positive? Couples especially need to address the retirement puzzle together. While many books have been sketching out principles and practices for personal growth in the retirement process, we haven't yet had a book that is specifically designed for couples. We do now, and this book by Dori Mintzer and Roberta Taylor is just what we've needed - practical, inspiring help for couples exploring the new terrain in positive aging to discover ways to converse that will promote a mutually supportive, deepening relationship that sustains their individual and joint growth. This book is based on the authors' personal and professional experience as psychotherapists and third age life coaches. It is packed with stories, examples, fun exercises, and coaching tips for starting and sustaining those crucially important conversations about when, whether, where, and how to plan your retirement transition to a more meaningful life. I find it a book that keeps engaging us as we read it - it wears well, like an old friend. In a decade of workshops and classes focusing on the principles for third age growth, I frequently have people ask me: as I change course, how can I get my partner to join me so that we can grow together?
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17 of 19 people found the following review helpful By Barbara Abramowitz, LHMC, LMFT on May 12, 2011
Format: Paperback
Taylor and Mintzer have created a well-written, comprehensive, thought-provoking and practical guide for couples at any stage of retirement planning. Particularly helpful are the case vignettes that inspire and showcase couple's creative thinking and problem solving around retirement dilemmas. Highlighting communication skills, the authors seek to help couples create a shared vision for retirement while honoring individual differences and needs. The authors' sharing of their own life and retirement journeys adds to the warmth and accessibility of their writing. This is on my must read list for all contemplating or in the throes of retirement planning.
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful By BestLifeFirst on April 24, 2011
Format: Paperback
Consistently, the most challenging aspect of a transition is being able to talk about it with all the different stakeholders in such a way as to promote clarity, momentum and to get results.

Whether you live in a traditional family environment or one that has become blended over time, whether your marriage is great or not so great... and even if you are single, the authors have chosen the "right" conversations. They have complemented these with other useful tools, anecdotal stories and summary sheets to encourage readers to plan more openly, effectively and authentically for what can certainly be the "best" half. Enjoy!
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Joseph Or on February 23, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Retirement is a life changing event (DUH!). The challenge? Entering into retirement with an understanding your partner's retirement expectations, or even if they want to retire. There's a natural order of time spent at work and at home. This routine allows many partners to go through life skirting important life issues. Retirement is an event that disrupts a 30-40, or more, year equilibrium.

This book provides a structured approach for discussing each persons view of the future. It offers the means of constructing a consensus vision of the future called "Retirement". The book offers several sets of retirement related questions for each partner to mull over and then share their answers. From each set of these questions common goals or expectations are identified and recorded in a "common vision" statement.

Be prepared! Working through these exercises honestly could surface very potent subterranean emotions.

Personally, I found the book to be a set of relationship building exercises with retirement as a central theme.
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By erphd on April 23, 2011
Format: Paperback
This book is a gold mine for those anticipating retirement and also for those already there. Each area covered is critical, but the non-financial topics especially are often overlooked by many as they think about retirement. The writing here is very engaging as are the quizes, exercises and "funwork" at the end of chapters. It is just the ticket to start meaningful conversations, complete with guidelines to keep those exchanges thoughtful and caring. As a psychologist who sees many folks anticipating this life stage, I am thrilled to have such a wonderful resource to refer them to.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By Karma B. Kitaj, PhD on April 21, 2011
Format: Paperback
Too few couples truly know how to listen to each other, especially when they have differences about how they want to live their lives at this crucial transition. Mintzer and Taylor wrote a well-researched how-to-do-it book, covering all the difficult conversations a couple might have as they approach retirement. They don't pose as experts; they acknowledge that they are works in progress themselves and share some of their vulnerable moments. Yet, as psychotherapists and life coaches, they have a perspective to share that is valuable to people from all different backgrounds. They explore topics that many couples find challenging, from deciding whether to stay put or move, to health and sexuality, to blended families, to money. They effectively make the case for learning healthy communication tools and model that in the varied vignettes that enliven the book.
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