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80 of 83 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Gay Man Struggling With Out-of-Control Sex? Here's Your Guidebook...
As a gay man who came out early, but never had any guidance on how to explore my sexuality other than negative messages from my conservative upbringing, I was like a kid in a candy store when I gained my "freedom". The marketers in my community promoted, packaged, and sold uninhibited, no-strings sexual encounters like cheap lolipops. The "perfect" man was found on...
Published on August 30, 2005 by Daniel D

versus
3.0 out of 5 stars Quite good reading.
It is not as deep as I expected but it helps understanding some
of our sexual concerns and some prejudice we may feel agains our own feelings.
Published 4 months ago by SILVIO L DA SILVA


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80 of 83 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Gay Man Struggling With Out-of-Control Sex? Here's Your Guidebook..., August 30, 2005
By 
Daniel D "DJD" (Los Angeles, CA USA) - See all my reviews
As a gay man who came out early, but never had any guidance on how to explore my sexuality other than negative messages from my conservative upbringing, I was like a kid in a candy store when I gained my "freedom". The marketers in my community promoted, packaged, and sold uninhibited, no-strings sexual encounters like cheap lolipops. The "perfect" man was found on every page in every gay rag, and presumably, in every bar or club. An so this is where I learned about sex. "Relationships" were relegated to a small column on one of the back pages sandwiched between "escorts" and "one night stands". After 20 years of being encouraged to run from problems into the bed of the next, new hot stud, I realized my life was becoming more empty and isolated. My routine was work/gym/club/sex. I worked only to pay for the gym, the clubs, and ultimately, the sex. I slept when I had a chance. The internet made cruising easier. I spent hours each nite "setting up" encounters, perusing dozens if not hundreds of men online before selecting one or a few for a hook up. I ate and slept only when I found the time, or when my computer crashed. I could not go on a trip without setting up encounters while there, or cruising the bars, parks, bathhouses, etc. The thought of a relationship only brought on feelings of hopelessness. So it was back to cruising. This was my life.

There are other books out there on sex addiction, like "Out of the Shadows" by Patrick Carnes, but NONE written specifically by a gay man FOR gay men. If you are a gay man of any age and have had questions about your sexual activities, or feel a sense of hopelessness about finding the "right" guy, PLEASE read this book by one of the leading experts in sex addiction!!! Or at least, find someone who has it, or go to a bookstore and browse it.

The extremists on the right want to completely strip us of our equal rights and dignity that we have fought so hard to get, and now it seems the tide is starting to turn in their direction, yet many of us have no idea how to pull ourselves out of the bathhouses and chat rooms to fight back, let alone form stable, loving relationships.

This is a WONDERFUL guidebook to help lead you down a path to a richer, fuller, more enjoyable life. But it is only a guide... you have to do the leg work.

GREAT BOOK!!!!
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18 of 19 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Every gay man should read this, November 14, 2006
By 
Anonymous (Melbourne, Australia) - See all my reviews
As someone whose addiction only very slowly dawned on me - I knew I was unhappy and depressed but didn't really understand why until a friend told me about his substance addiction and how it went in six week cycles and another friend told me about his sex addiction - then I got the feeling that maybe I also had a problem. I had this book on my Amazon wishlist for months before I bought it - the act of buying it was an acknowledgement that I MIGHT have a problem and have to deal with it.

When it finally arrived I read it from cover to cover in an evening. I liked the way it looked at gay lifestyles from various angles and refrained from judging. I also found it very practical - for instance, the "30 day test" to determine if you have a problem with sex addiction. I went through the 30 days, and was convinced - I had a problem.

Since then, reading and acting on the advice in this book has been a lifesaver for me. I don't necessarily enjoy the AA approach it advocates, but found enough in it for me not to have to go to 12 step groups, yet still take positive steps to emerge from what has been a kind of hell.

And why every gay man should read this? In my community, sex addiction isn't even talked about. So to write an entire book about it - that's a great service. Buy it, read it, and pass it on.
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28 of 33 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Every gay male should read this book, August 6, 2005
Every gay male should read this book. If it doesn't help you, it could help you to help someone else. If you are spending alot of time cruising, but wish you could find a relationship, sex addiction could very well be your problem.

Much thanks to the author... this book saved my relationship.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars "One of the Best Books I Have Ever Read", June 29, 2011
By 
Terrance Richard "Terry Richard" (Fredericton, New Brunswick, Canada) - See all my reviews
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)   
Being an openly gay man for over 20 years now I have seen everything within the gay community. Like many gay males I know that a very large part of our culture is sex. This isn't really because we are gay, but for the simple reason we are men. It has been proven men tend to have a higher level of promiscuity than women as females tend to lean more on the side of relationships. I also must add that yes I do know many gay men who sleep around (myself included), but it is important to note that I know even more straight males who play the field searching for their next conquest.

In "Crusie Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men" the writer discusses when a gay man should know if they are having a problem with too much sex, if this behavior is keeping them from doing other things in their life, and how to seek treatment.

More importantly this book (published in 2005) couldn't have come at a greater time in gay history as more and more gay men are having unsafe sexual practices with numerous partners so it is intrical that all gays get a chance to read this book for it may very well save their lives. The author, Dr. Robert Weiss, doesn't knock down or ridicule gay men for having sex; if anything he applauds them for doing it after all having a healthy sexual life is important to anyone. He simply pinpoints if you are indeed a sex addict and how to go about seeking treatment for such an unhealthy way of living.

Hopefully the publisher will reprint this wonderful book as it is now out-of-print, but many used copies are circulating around.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Cruise Control, July 26, 2008
By 
Being that I am a gay man in SA; a sex addiction recovery program as well as having over 20 yrs sobriety in AA I am no slouch in terms of recognizing when something this informative and compelling arrives on the scene. I found this book to cover most of the tools and information that I have gleaned over the years in one concise presentation, I like the way that it is presentled in a non-pretentious sort of way that I occasionally find in this type of book, where someone writes about that which they have no personal experience. Thank you for inspiring presentation.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Resource For Gay Men Struggling With Compulsive Sexual Behavior, June 9, 2013
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There are quite a few books on the topic of sexual addiction that were recommended to me by my therapist, but reading them only made me feel less convinced that I had a problem. Most of the examples given and behaviors described were way outside of my experience. Luckily, I found this book and was able to truly understand my own compulsive behavior. Written specifically for gay men, and perfectly positioned within the 21st century gay male culture, this book is a highly enlightening read for any gay man struggling with compulsive sexual behavior. Highly recommended.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars You may find why your sexual life is so problematic for you, July 19, 2008
After reading this book you'll finally understand what was happening to you that motivaded you to endless cruising while isolated you from your friends, familiy, hobbies and joy.
What is great about this book is it not only makes you understand sex addiction, it gives you many information about how to recover from it.
I also think it is valuable reading for every gay/bi men since it helps in distinguishing to what degree one's sexual adventures are or are not an addictive behaviour.
This book must be translated to other languages fast!
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3.0 out of 5 stars Quite good reading., May 21, 2014
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It is not as deep as I expected but it helps understanding some
of our sexual concerns and some prejudice we may feel agains our own feelings.
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5.0 out of 5 stars fantastic, April 29, 2014
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Hi think this is a fantastic read for any gay man with a sex, porn addiction.
Easy to read book
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5.0 out of 5 stars I love this book on sex addiction, March 27, 2014
By 
Lance Larson (Marquette, MI USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
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Sex is an addiction. Manu feel it is not but it is. I really enjoy the author and the different perspectives.
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Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction In Gay Men
Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction In Gay Men by Robert Weiss (Paperback - May 16, 2012)
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